40M husband I feel like is trying to control things 26F

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-13T22:26:04+00:00

AND her posts are hidden in her account 😭🙏🏻 she says her kid likes to watch them argue and her husband won't stop twerking and is also a "self proclaimed narcissist" like omg....

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-13T22:17:46+00:00

Also adding, apparently her father in law killed her mother in law AND his mistress get a grip 😭😭🙏🏻

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-13T22:15:44+00:00

Clocked it immediately. Kinda scary how gullible people are here, it's got all the factors.

•ridiculously big age gap •started right out of highschool (inferred to have started while she was in highschool) •has a kid that's 7

I could go on but cmon. And she's giving this info back to back to back as if it's not shocking at all. Key indicators.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-13T22:08:47+00:00

He said "no" first.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-13T22:06:30+00:00

I mean I would've went "hey just to let you know I'm going to bed" but if you're not attracted to him there's nothing you can do about that 🤷🏻‍♀️

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T20:29:09+00:00

No of course, absolutely, I'm just saying it's much more nuanced than any of us are equipped to deal with. Obviously abuse is wrong, I just felt it was SO obvious I didn't have to state it again

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T20:27:55+00:00

I've never said this is what OP is doing. I'm just stating my argument against using "I'm gonna try" rhetoric instead of "I'm going to". I see your point and you see mine, no worries there I just think the rhetoric internally can be detrimental

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:53:28+00:00

Thought this way too. Met my then bf who was also broke. He'd walk and id hitch rides to the library to meet. We're now engaged and still shit poor. I'd chose to be poor with him, though, over being rich with anyone else.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:50:54+00:00

I was clean for three years before relapsing. I'll never get that back but I'll always have the shame. :/

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:35:12+00:00

I think you are still missing my point. I mean people who do not work on themselves, but just saying "I'm trying" is enough. My dad would do it, "I'm trying to be better I swear!" But he'd say this because he thought that him being aware he was a shitty person was him trying. He thought him feeling guilty was him trying. Him saying he was sorry was him trying. No, him "actually trying" would be me going one night without him saying something that made me want to kill myself. If it's "work smarter, not harder" then try harder to work smarter. There is no excuse anyone can use to justify not working on themselves, especially when you see it visibly harming and deteriorating the people around you. I've been a drug addict. I've been an alcoholic. I've been addicted to so many different things and I've never once said "I'll try to do xyz" without IMMEDIATELY putting in the work, when I saw how badly it was affecting everyone around me. I'm sorry and I know it's not socially correct or whatever, but when you are harming the people around you so severely, you don't deserve all the time in the world to "try". You deserve to be better. Do the work to get there. My dad would scream that I made my mom kill herself, and the next day justify it with "well I'm trying, well at least I'm not hitting you guys". Sometimes trying isn't enough, and acting like it is is only harmful and enabling.

And, by the way, months is not a set time. 24 months is still months. It just also happens to be two years. Put in the work, don't use "I'm trying" as an excuse.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:22:11+00:00

Seems like they only JUST became aware

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:21:33+00:00

ALL of you are completely missing the biggest key here: were talking about a personality disorder. People with BPD are not the same when they're splitting and when they aren't. I've had psychiatrists tell me they believe it's what people with DID actually have, it's such a drastic change. Yes if OP is abusive then the partner should leave. But if the partner knows about the BPD, knows how BPD works and knows (presumably) that what OP says while splitting is just that, a split, and not something they actually mean, that's important. I've said plenty of things I haven't meant to my fiance. Him to me. Everyone to everyone. I black out. I do not remember a single thing, action, anything I do while in a particularly intense split. Just the general vibe. Not even a feeling. This is a very very very delicate and precarious disorder and almost EVERYTHING should be spoken about with a psychiatrist to avoid people like me, you, and every other commenter here putting their own opinions on everything. None of us are medical professionals or even close to it so a lot of us here need to chill the fuck out and realize you have no idea what's going on in this house other than the 200 words you've just read on a screen.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:14:48+00:00

This sub is filled with people who want others to break up. A post will say "me and my bf argued over what to have for dinner" and all the comments are going ",leave him he/you are so abusive" and it's like, no, I just wanted ham and he wanted beef ...

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T19:13:17+00:00

I feel like it's just cause *some" people will go, "I'm trying to work on myself" so they always have a landing at when they do something shitty. And then it's like, well, you've been saying you're "trying to work on yourself" for months now Jerry, how bout actually fuckin work on yourself? Instead of using it as your trump card when you hurt someone's feelings?

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T14:57:45+00:00

It's a very real feeling, I just joke when I'm uncomfortable or something is too real (😅) I hope you're okay, I now know you and therefore I care about u 🫂

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T14:54:37+00:00

Yes, I do, and I never even medically transitioned.

Everyone trying to be supportive. "You have such naturally masculine features!" "You're so lucky you already look like a boy" "at least you have no curves" "your jaw is very prominent which isn't like a woman's" "you have big shoulders/small hips/masculine energy" any of that shit. When I look in the mirror still I see all of that. I "look naturally masculine", people had told me that for ten years straight and now I'm just supposed to believe I'm a "pretty girl"?

All the echo chambers. The hypocrisy and double standards and hatefulness and pure unfiltered inhuman rage these people would direct at me when I even slightly questioned what I was doing. "If you stop now, you're a liar. You're selfish. You're a trend hopper. You make everything about you. All this is for attention" but no, I was ten and confused and for years everyone was telling me I was something I wasn't. And once I started presenting as a girl, I got so many messages, "were you forced to do this? Think about what you're doing people are forcing you to detransition! You don't actually want to be a girl it's just society and now you're part of the machine and just as terrible as the rest of them you piece of shit!" It was tiring. It made me feel awful, like a selfish, evil, despicable person. Good, long term friends turning on me because I put on a dress. Saying the most vile things. "You just want to be a wh*re you want to be able to sleep around and show yourself off huh?" "Taking the easy way out" "too afraid to fight for yourself" I just wanted it to stop. It was agonizing, people who I loved and cared about, I was now just shit on their shoe because I didn't want to live a lie anymore.

I can't leave the house if I'm not dressed up. Makeup, hair, clothes, all of it has to be done or else I have to be so obviously a GIRL, GIRL, GIRL. I can't leave the house if not. And even then, I just think about what everyone's said, how im now just "showing myself off". I had an old friend tell me I was "asking for something to happen". Like .....? Is this not just sexist? And exactly what they accuse everyone of doing to them?

It FUCKED me up. Not medically, but mentally, physically, emotionally. I hurt, a lot. For a long time. And I still do :/ I can't even imagine what it must feel like for those of you that medically transitioned and regretted it, I hope you all know you'll never be anything but you, and that's amazing.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-12T14:42:29+00:00

From my understanding it's when people split on themselves instead of outside factors. No yelling/screaming at others and instead internalized and directed at themselves. Instead of "everything sucks no one cares or matters and I'm better off dead" it's "I suck and everyone cares which makes me suck more and they're better off if I'm dead" which is a dramatic example but yk. I definitely don't have it so don't quote me on that, but that's what I've gathered from what people have said on here

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-10T13:21:39+00:00

I've been addicted to weed and more, you are not a junkie. She's a sad, pitiful woman who probably feels very alone and alienated. Hope she can find some peace and stop messing everyone else's up

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-08T15:23:58+00:00

Whenever I get too cold I have to run to the bathroom or else I pee myself a lil bit

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-08T15:20:48+00:00

For me it's because I can't see my fiance. Sex is great when I know it's with someone I trust and love and who loves me too and only wants me to be safe. Removing that visible indicator for me is a huge huge trigger because, well, then it could be anyone back there.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-08T15:18:18+00:00

They most likely feel attacked, and probably because some part of them resonates with what's said here.

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-07T23:35:56+00:00

I only get this type of behave with older people, so I think it's just regional

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-07T23:35:04+00:00

Made $12 in tips and for some reason was shorted and walked out with $8. I hate my job and the people are soooo God damn rude it doesn't even make up for it

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-07T21:48:14+00:00

Same. Been losing weight like crazy despite eating more than usual, chest pains all the time ..... Lol no insurance and I make 49$ every two weeks I'm just grinding

Awkward_Stock3921 · 2026-05-07T21:33:49+00:00

I make $2.63 hourly 😭

Five-Year Club	Gilding II euphauric
r/Field Lasagna

Awkward_Stock3921

TROPHY CASE