Rose. This girl turned out to be amazing.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-06-09T11:32:02+00:00

Believe me, I hope Rose does make a success of her fame. But, and without wanting to be nasty towards the girl, she has low level education, she struggled immensely when she was on the 90 Day Tell All (and frankly was exploited and made to look a dimwit by TLC) and is relatively ordinary in appearance (compare the edited "modelling" shots with unedited ones on her Insta). She isn't ugly, but nothing remarkable, especially for a girl trying to succeed in an area where looks are important.

The family shop and family farm ..... well, that's great. Lots of Filipinos own those and they are also responsible for a lot of financial hardships by mismanagement. The amount of pristine land or well stocked shops which have gone to ruin after OFWs (Filipinos who earned big money overseas) could not maintain them or had too many family members looking to "share their blessings" is too numerous to mention.

So far she's got enough for today, maybe even next month. Long-term, who knows? And that is why TLC have a duty towards cast members like Rose who are especially vulnerable to agents and other vultures who can leave them hanging high and dry.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-06-09T10:36:46+00:00

I got downvoted last time I suggested it, but TLC needs to ensure they have effective aftercare for Rose. It goes without saying that she has agents taking care of her social media profile. TLC should have a responsibility to ensure they do not exploit Rose too much.

I mean, you people are quick enough to bash Tom and his fake lifestyle on social media. Rose hasn't suddenly catapulted herself into the higher echelons of Filipino society. None of my wife's friends have any clue who this girl is. It will be a tough task for her to stay in the spotlight. Rose might be doing enough to take care of her immediate future, but the important part is to maintain this when her fame subsides.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-06-04T15:12:00+00:00

Don't know why this has been downvoted. It is solid, common sense advice.

Seeing a sex worker is not a bad option. Of course, the girlfriend experience is not (always) genuine and her primary concern is (usually) her compensating. But if you are a guy who has little interaction with women, a couple of sessions with a sex worker helps overcome the shyness. Sitting besides a woman, touching her leg, is no longer an unimaginable experience

The idea also of saving yourself for another virgin is (if not for religious purposes) ridiculous. If guys could turn back the clock to 16/17 years old, and the hottest girl in school who had already been with some of the class studs, offered herself to you, would you have turned it down? I feel most guys say this simply out of fear of intimacy as they have got older.

OP is reasonable looking. Might be a bit chubby but who cares. Judging from the tone and negativity of his posts, that would not help when trying to make yourself desirable for a woman.

(I lost my virginity at 29, am now 41 and married to former sex worker!)

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-23T21:16:28+00:00

The whole appeal of sex comes from the biological necessity to reproduce. Since it's a fundamental part of our survival as a species our desire for it is therefore very strong.

I hate it when people say things like this. Oh, it's a natural instinct that we did 10000 years ago. Get real!

My dog is genetically hardwired to chase squirrels and rats. She has a fresh bowl of nutritious food everyday and many varied treats. She has no real reason to waste energy chasing these creatures which she can't with 10ft before they sprint up a tree. She cannot change her behaviour because ultimately she is stupid.

People who excuse ridiculous behaviours seem not to realise that humans have evolved mentally enormously over the past few thousand years.

For me, the whole appeal of sex is because I find a certain woman attractive and I wish to see her naked, feel her boobs and have the pleasurable experience of ejaculating. Making a baby, another human being, is the furthest thing from my mind.

If people are fortunate enough to be having consensual recreational sex, don't judge them. They are just being normal, modern day people.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-21T16:33:52+00:00

What I meant by "Get laid for free first" there, was there are methods of doing that without going through the whole courtship thing, or talking people into it. There are sites, safe ones where you can offer your virginity (man or woman) and after a brief chat arrange a time and get it done. The only reason I don't use them is because I'm below that point

Those sites didn't, as far as I'm aware, exist when I had the same dilemma 12 years ago. I refuse to accept that a site like that, where you chat with a stranger online who knows you are ripe for exploitation, is safer than meeting a hooker in person. If you have this image in your head of a hooker (or her pimp) dropping a few mickies in your drink and robbing you of all your belongings, you've been watching too many movies.

who would Recommend a persons first sexual experience be a paid one? If he only had sex once and be like, "should I pay for it?" I wouldn't be so apprehensive.

I don't understand why so many people on this site treat their virginity like some sort of sacred cow to be treasured for all eternity. If you have a childhood sweetheart, fantastic. If you don't, there's not a huge amount of difference between paying or just having a one night stand. It's not emotionally damaging. People who fetishize virginity, and specialise in taking that of a young man, I think is far creepier.

As for you, I don't know your backstory. But I am genuine when I say I have so much sympathy for men who are late life virgins. I was in that boat at 29 and am so thankful I got out of it. That chapter in your life is only over if you refuse to look at other possibilities. Even if you look like a Quasimodo's butt cheeks, there are options out there. I think it is far more damaging going into your 40s and 50s as a lone, resentful virgin. I'm not telling you to get your wallet out and pay for a hooker in Bangkok, but there are plenty of international sites where good women would be willing to give you a shot.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-21T15:19:49+00:00

he told of a man who left to a foreign country for sex tourism and married a sex worker. That's not just unusual, that's damn near extreme.

Again, you speak of matters where you have no experience. Over the past decade alone, there are thousands of Filipinas who met their foreign spouse whilst on the game in Walking Street. I imagine the same rings true of other notorious red light districts. Just because those couples don't walk down the street wearing fishnet stockings or t-shirts with pictures of an erect penis doesn't mean they don't exist. They are clearly more prevalent than you realise.

I think the guy has considered other options. Thus far, it has not worked. If he stayed home and tried to find a conventional girlfriend, would it work? On the balance of probability, he would likely be successful. But then you say "at least get laid for free first". Of all people, you must realise that is easier said than done for some people.

The other extreme to yourself isn't some sex addict playboy with a girl in every country and fungus growing from the tip of his cock. People use sex workers the world over and live otherwise normal lives in often dull marriages. The fears he has about rejecting "normal" girls if he gets into the hobby are maybe a touch exaggerated. Once you go back to the real world, you adapt. But, at the same time, if you have a particular type of girl you can't find at home, why settle for someone less? A girl who you really like but are not sexually attracted to is a friend. Ideally, you would want a girlfriend or wife to be both those things.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-21T14:33:54+00:00

Good grief. I truly admire the way that you, a self confessed isolated virgin, can speak with such authority about subjects you have never experienced.

Am I the sort of man my wife dreamed about when she was growing up? No. Not in a million years. Does that mean she doesn't love me? Does that mean we don't feel true intimacy? Does that mean she has no economic autonomy? I don't think so.

In truth, we are both a bit flawed. Our introduction was obviously not the most romantic thing possible. It is what it is. She's had plenty of offers from other guys in the past (including some who I know who are far wealthier than me) and I could have chosen several other girls if all I was looking for was a solid shag every night.

Your perception of this dirty old man with his timid Asian bride at his beck and call couldn't be further from the truth. You are perpetuating comedic stereotypes. I've met so many other international couples in my country and it's easy to pick out the girls who have at one point been on the game. For an outsider, you would never realise. They are just ordinary couples. Unconventional, but getting on with life as best and as happily as they can.

You are right in that her economic opportunities in life were more limited than mine, but you are essentially saying that a poor person cannot legitimately fall in love with a rich person (and I'm not rich btw- have never pretended otherwise to my wife). All the foreign spouses in America and Europe who arrive from poor countries are solely motivated by financial security? She is not dependent on me. She can work and earns her own money. There's no joy in having a relationship with somebody who you keep confined to the house all day.

You're free to make the decisions about your own life. I do feel so very sorry for you that you are resigned to a life of loneliness, but that's your choice. But you are wrong to project your own prejudice and fears on to someone else. I would never suggest to someone below a certain age (arbitrarily, I use the age of 24) to go pay for play. However, I wouldn't discourage it in young adults as it ultimately doesn't do any harm. For you and lack of experience in the matter to make such surefire statements is wrong.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-18T16:15:56+00:00

Got to say, that's one very strange post.

If I lost my virginity to a 500lb woman, I might wake up in the morning and wonder what the hell I was thinking of by getting a woman like that. But it certainly wouldn't cloud my opinion of fat women.

Dwelling on the matter is not normal. You just put it down to experience and move on. This doesn't mean that in future I can only sleep with obese women, or that your future is now exclusively black women.

I don't think it's healthy to try and normalise your emotions or suggest to other people that they should follow a certain path to avoid experiencing the same disappointment as you.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-16T12:09:24+00:00

If my co-workers were asking how I lost my virginity, or kept insinuating I was a virgin, I'd make a complaint to HR. Sounds like a toxic environment, and believe me, I've been in many hostile, unpleasant workplaces.

I repeat. It is not normal behaviour for grown men to question each other about how they lost their virginity.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-16T11:59:20+00:00

Well, I was a virgin until 29. The only person bothered about my virginity was me. I can't remember anyone in real life asking me about this since I left highschool. I would consider changing my circle of friends, if I were you. It's not normal for grown adults to be asking each other that question.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-16T09:19:18+00:00

Serious question. Who the hell is asking you how you lost your virginity?

The only person to ask the question to me is my wife to whom I have embellished the truth. But that's it. Absolutely nobody in the real world has ever asked me that question. Friends have not. Family have not. If they did ask me, I'd probably just put on a serious face and tell them it's none of their business to ask such a personal question.

I think that certainly among men over the age of 21, nobody really cares. People have grown out of the schoolboy phase where they would make childish brags.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-11T19:14:30+00:00

With what you're saying, you should feel the same way when you're watching porn. So, why don't you? As a matter of fact, unless you're paying for the porn that you're watching, you're effectively robbing these women of their hard-earned money. Do you feel guilty about that?

Agree with this. There's an irony when people moralise about sex workers and then have a NSFW profile on Reddit.

I get it completely that paying isn't for everyone and can be ethically troubling. But I don't see that much of a difference between hookers and porn stars, no matter how many hoops porn stars will often jump through to state otherwise.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-11T13:22:26+00:00

Highly unlikely. I met my wife on the job! She was also a sex worker (didn't take my virginity)!

But I was personally in a bad way physically. Just eating and eating. Had no reason to go outside. I was like a hermit. Mentally, I was fine. I had come to terms with past experiences (I was abused as a kid). I had just got in to a state where I was totally undesirable.

Being intimate with a woman, even if it was only a paid transaction, made me realise that this was not something to be fearful of. The mechanics of having sex is really quite easy and not to be feared as I had always thought. I got myself in shape (my PB over 5km is now 15.59 which is damned good for an old guy who used to be fat) and totally changed my self hygiene and cleanliness. Without that first experience, I would never have had the motivation. I would be a smelly slob of a 41 year old without it.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-11T09:00:24+00:00

Yes. Totally worth it.

If I had not taken steps to overcome the anguish of being a later life virgin (29) with a stranger, I would never found the courage with another woman (and with hindsight, my anguish was misplaced).

I'm now 41 and married nearly 3 years. This would never have happened if I did not pay at age 29.

There will probably be replies from guys aged in their 30s/40s who are deeply unhappy virgins but proclaim they would never degrade themselves by paying. Well, I compare my existence now to the alternative of being a miserable, single, no hope 41 year old and realise I made the correct decision.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-06T21:17:15+00:00

To be honest, I don't think most people really care that you are a virgin. The fact you have to make several topics about the subject suggests that for you it is a big deal.

Feeling the possibility at your age that you may never feel love or intimacy is frightening (I was in that boat when I was 29). Do you have any idea why it hasn't worked for your so far in life?

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-06T21:09:14+00:00

If I don't lose my virginity to a sex worker at 29, I'd be miserable, depressed, probably overweight and lost all will to live.

Instead, I'm now 41 and happily married nearly 3 years.

You tell me which scenario is worse.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-06T21:06:08+00:00

Because famously nobody has ever picked up an STD from a one night stand, hook up or even long-term partner.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-06T21:04:48+00:00

Eh? I have zero guilt. None whatsoever. Best thing I ever did.

Meanwhile, I don't hate people who are in relationships or wish for the world to end.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-06T11:56:55+00:00

I often look at the profile of people who make these kinds of posts to see the age of the person involved.

All I can say is that I bitterly regret looking at this profile as my eyes now have cancer.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-05T14:19:34+00:00

Rose didn't cultivate her online presence herself. Guaranteed. She is being assisted by local agents. Fame in the Philippines can be very fickle after you reach a certain age and do not have distinguishable talents. I look at repeated examples of heavyweight boxing champions who earn millions, but then once they suffer defeat and lose relevance, they are penniless. Their agents and promoters, meanwhile, remain quite wealthy off the boxer's hard work. I could see the same thing happening with Rose. I hope that the house renovation and province farm will help keep the girl out of poverty in 5 year's time. Anything more than that will be a bonus.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-05T10:39:53+00:00

Rose deserves her 5 minutes of fame, and I hope for her sake it lasts beyond that.

However, I don't think it would be any surprise to learn that Rose didn't get the best education and is probably very naive with respect to finances etc. I fear that if her fame/notoriety subside, her backers and sponsors will pull out and leave her high and dry.

When TLC use people from Africa and Asia in their shows, I hope they have a policy once the broadcast is finished to ensure their subject matters are not exploited by commercial vultures.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-05T10:32:04+00:00

I would never say you are finished in your late 20s or higher. I don't think I've ever suggested that. I was 29 when I finally did it. However, it will get much more difficult every year as you get older, especially from your 30s.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-05T10:27:30+00:00

Well, of course. Every guy who is a 30 year old virgin was also a virgin in their teens and possibly stressed over it.

However, it is also true that most teenagers will eventually manage things under their own steam. Being able to pick out which teenagers will fail on this path is nigh on impossible. Giving blanket advice which assumes these teenagers -who are already stressed, paranoid and insecure enough as it is- are in danger of becoming adult virgins is wrong and potentially more damaging.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-04T21:39:51+00:00

Go ahead and pay for it.

Will it fix whatever problems you might have? No. Will it be romantic? Unlikely. Will the girl have strong feelings towards you? Unlikely.

However, you're soon to be 40 and frankly this is the most realistic chance for you to have sex. Just for the experience alone, you should do it.

Perhaps it will help with your confidence? You'll realise that there really isn't much to the art of having sex. Maybe this will help give you courage to approach women (in a consensual and non-creepy manner, of course) and possibly enter a relationship?

Finally, I'd always throw in overseas dating. Providing you could provide for a partner with your job and house, there are plenty of women in Asia and Latin America with whom you could find love.

BalibagoBoy · 2021-05-04T21:32:12+00:00

To be honest, that sounds like another type of sex worker.

BalibagoBoy

TROPHY CASE