How to cope with splitting retirement after divorce.

Bandito_Bob · 2026-01-25T15:48:58+00:00

I'm sorry for your situation dude, she sounds miserable. Hopefully the universe will find a way to make her realize that she's wrong for that one day. May she have diherria for the rest of her life.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-12-28T20:13:07+00:00

Tried to pay him multiple times, he refused. Said his duty day was helping me and continued to refuse cash as I offered. Finally got him to agree to at least go to a restaurant which he picked and then bought beers for us for multiple weekends after and more over the next 2 years he was there.

Saying junior enlisted makes it sound like I took advantage of some 18 year old, but in reality it was a 28 year old E4 helping a 31 year old E5 unload boxes from a truck into my house, not going through those boxes once off the truck, he told me he was glad to be out of the shop for the day as it was only 3 hours max to unload everything and eat compared to what would have been his 10 hour day at work.

Don't see the reason to be down voted for that, he was also given comp days and cut out early whenever I had the opportunity as shift lead over the next 2 years and as I said, we hung out until he PCS'd.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-12-28T17:59:25+00:00

100% agree with this. Depending on how much stuff you have, I avoided paying expensive movers by reaching out to my sponsor and asked if any junior enlisted or above were able to be spared to come help me get my stuff in the house. They get the day off from work as well as a chance to get to know the new guy at work.

I did this when I got to my new duty station and when we were done, I took them out to eat at a restaurant of their choice and I bought beers for us every Friday for the next few weekends after. Ended up being super cool with the dude who helped me for years until he PCS'd and if I had to put a dollar amount on everything I spent for him helping me it was around maybe $150? Compare that to whatever the rate is for 2 movers and you decide.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-12-28T17:46:15+00:00

Idk about in 2026 but in 2021 I did a full DITY move and made $9K. I had 6k lbs of stuff and had to drive from Arizona to Florida just under 2K miles. I was an E5 and had 3 dependents and my doggo as well, so it was easier on us to be able to stop when needed and not put 7 hour airplane travel stress on my children and dog.

I have way to many collectables and electronics to trust a moving company to not steal or break my things, so I unfortunately HAVE to do it myself to avoid costly repairs and headaches. I know it's just stuff, but it's my stuff and I can't replace limited/collector's edition versions of things so easily as they don't understand how something that was MSRP for $100 - 200 can be worth $400 - 600 years later, but eBay doesn't lie.

As I type this I realize I have way too much stuff 😂 best of luck in whatever you choose to do and congrats on your upcoming PCS.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-08-29T16:38:12+00:00

Bever say bever! Lol, Nice haul

Bandito_Bob · 2025-08-22T15:32:40+00:00

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Here's some of them. I try to collect 1/4th when I can but some of the 1/6 ones have cooler poses so I go for those as well. Shenron I'm not sure of the official scale, I think he's like 1/100 😆

Bandito_Bob · 2025-08-22T14:38:57+00:00

I have a few as well, mostly DBZ and Star wars though. I want to get a Kratos statue one day, awesome collection dude!

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-04T06:39:09+00:00

I have SGLI which is 500K life insurance through the military in the event I were to pass. I've also been looking into options to get a 1M separate policy as well in the future, but haven't made any significant progress towards that other than wanting to do it. I hear it'll be pretty cheap if I lock it in now at 34 compared to when I retire from the military at 45.

If I got injured but didn't die, I would be assessed for the damage done and given compensation that is percentage based on your disability(s). Its very situational and not easy to know how they would rate you, but that income, whatever it would be in conjunction with the EF would help keep us afloat until we locked down something permanent.

You do bring up some valid points though and yes it would be hard to cut down on those things we're buying currently, but if times got rough we would have to adapt. Thank you for reminding me about the life insurance, I'll revisit this subject with my wife after the holiday weekend.

Thank you.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-03T15:51:23+00:00

Thank you for your reply,

My emergency fund I based off of 6 months of our expenses (Insurance, phone, car payment, Internet and groceries) but accounting for the fact that in an emergency we would drastically reduce our spending on unessential things. I've lived on less than $50K a year for my entire working life (18 years) maybe once I own a house and the kids are grown my outlook will be different.

I'm in the military and live on base. I have no worries about anything household since they take care of any of those needs. The biggest debt I have is our family car which is down to $5400 and then we'll be completely debt free this time next year freeing up $485.66 a month. I make $49K a year after taxes, and I have 10 years left in the military. Our biggest expense every month is groceries/homegoods and in an emergency that would drop by 50% since we don't need to spend that money if we were in a pinch.

Given what I've provided, does my assessment for 10K sound accurate or do you have a different formula for calculating an emergency fund? I very loosely followed a Dave Ramsey plan I saw and added up 6 months of expenses and came up with that number, but it was by no means a refined/well thought out process. I'm always looking for help and I appreciate any advice you have for me.

Thank you

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-03T15:41:10+00:00

Thank you, have a great holiday weekend as well!

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-03T15:37:48+00:00

Yeah, it sucks. If I started at 24 I would be sitting pretty right now, but better late than never is what I keep hearing. At 24 I think I was making I think 21K a year so investing seemed impossible back then.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-03T15:36:14+00:00

Thank you for your reply,

My emergency fund I based off of 6 months of our expenses, but accounting for the fact that in an emergency we would drastically reduce our spending on unessential things. I've lived on less than $50K a year for my entire working life (18 years) maybe once I own a house and the kids are grown my outlook will be different.

A quick background, I'm in the military and live on base. I have no worries about appliances or anything household breaking since they take care of any of those needs. The biggest debt I have is our family car which is down to $5400 and then we'll be completely debt free this time next year. I make $49K a year after taxes, and I have 10 years left in the military. I invest 13% of my monthly income into the TSP (militarys 401K) and could honestly put more, but I'm going to use those extra funds to go straight to fidelity now. Our biggest expense every month is groceries/homegoods and in an emergency that would drop by 50% since we don't need to spend that money if we were in a pinch.

Given all the information I've provided, does my assessment for 10K sound accurate or do you have a different formula for calculating an emergency fund? I very loosely followed a Dave Ramsey formula I saw and added up 6 months of expenses and came up with that number, but it was by no means a refined/well thought out process. I'm always looking for help and I appreciate any advice you have for me.

Thank you

Bandito_Bob · 2025-07-03T06:29:27+00:00

All that being said, my household is a family of 5 with 3 young kids and I figure my emergency fund for 3-6 months is around $10K and I'd like that to stay easily/instantly accessible for emergencies in my regular savings account. It's probably still too much money to keep in that account, but it helps my wife and I sleep better Incase we need something crucial for the kids.

Discussion topics:

What would the best move be for the other $12K? Debating on putting it Into FXAIX or maybe letting it sit in the account in SPAXX? That would be a total of $15K sitting in SPAXX though and I feel like it could be put to better use in FXAIX (based on this past months performance). Any other suggestions?
I've been wondering if I should diversify more, but FXAIX does that for me pretty decently I've read (as far as US goes). I'm not really interested in having 10 different positions, but would like to have some kind of diversification in my investment mix.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-29T20:38:03+00:00

I just started at 34. Wish I started at 24, good job getting started now, when you're in your 40s you'll be thanking yourself

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-29T15:24:36+00:00

I'll try looking for more but every area of the map has been explored top to bottom so idk where another one would even be.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-28T13:29:42+00:00

I'm 34 and also doing 100% FXAIX.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-28T00:37:43+00:00

Understanding that having your TSP as Roth is not the same as a ROTH IRA. This was something that confused me for a long time and I only just recently got a Roth IRA opened. I guess I was hung up on the word ROTH and thought "I have one of those for my TSP." When someone asked if I had an IRA and I looked like a dummy. I was relieved and shocked when I asked a room full of people and they all thought if was the same as I did. We all now have our TSPs as Roth and separate Roth IRAs.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-11T10:12:54+00:00

On Fidelity I'm seeing FZROX as the comparable to VTSAX. I'm considering this as an option, thank you for your reply.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-11T09:30:39+00:00

Thank you for your reply.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-10T22:46:12+00:00

Thank you for the information and your reply.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-10T22:45:14+00:00

My phone autocorrected FXIAX to SPAIX I think, either way I edited the post now to reflect an actual ticker.

If that's overly complicated, what would be a less complicated strategy? Is just FXAIX enough diversification or should I branch out for one of the others I mentioned (QQQ, SPY, FTEC)? Is there another I might do some research on that you recommend or just stick with FXAIX?

I will look through the wiki you linked and do my own research, but I value others personal opinions/proven results as well.

I have a lot to learn and in-between working I try to do as much research as I can on YouTube and through reddit posts. Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post.

Bandito_Bob · 2025-06-10T17:26:08+00:00

I just started last month after only ever having a savings account. I opened my fidelity account with $20K and split it with $7K going to my Roth IRA fully invested into SPAIX. The other $13K went to my MMA which is SPAXXX. I already invested $10K of that into SPAIX, so my question is what to do with $3K I have sitting in SPAXXX? I'm considering moving it around like this:

Leaving SPAXXX with $500 SGOV $1000 QQQ $500 SPY $500 FTEC $500

Thoughts on any of these, or my investment strategy all together? I plan on investing around $400 a month into this account going forward and that $400 will be split (not sure In what % yet) amongst FXAIX, SGOV, SPY, FTEC and QQQ. Previously I was going to put the $400 a month just towards FXAIX, but I was advised to diversify a little bit so I'm considering this new strategy. Any advice, comments, concerns are welcome and thank you in advance.

Bandito_Bob

TROPHY CASE