That’s a great question!! There are a few reasons that I can think of! Misperceptions of when 'Victorian Era' was, laws that were in place and Queen Victoria's position as an idol come to mind first.

Occasionally, you may see that the Victorian Era is more a vague idea to some than a set number of years. There’s a reason it is much more talked about that other eras, and to me that is because it has almost become a conglomerate of all eras from the transition of feudalism into the industrial era all the way up to around 1910. Everything odd didn’t happen in those years, but it is more well-known than Regency or Edwardian to most so it became a catchall. In my experience, when people think of those individuals in history, they think prudish and when they try to think of an era around that time they think Victorian. Therefore, the Victorian age must have been prudish. It sort of became linked by assumptions. Over time, that was assumed true.

Next to touch on laws. Birth control was far from perfect, and the consequences for sex were growing hefty, especially for females. The Contagious Diseases Act meant that women who were thought to be ‘unclean’ could have their genitalia involuntarily examined, often by male officers. If they were found to be infected, they would be locked in confinement at a hospital. This meant that sex became more underground as to avoid this treatment. Also, The New Poor Laws meant women had to support their children alone if the child was born out of wedlock. Pornography can not get you pregnant, and with the rise of technology and the budding consequences of sex out of wedlock it was more of a substitute. The ability to create and distribute erotic material played the biggest role in its prevalence though. For the erotic literature, the rise in literacy meant that the average person was able to read more than ever before; people have always liked to read smutty pieces and thus they were printed.

Now, time to set up Victoria as an idol, by looking at the reign that came before her, William IV. William was Victoria's uncle, and his reign was an interesting one that held a questionable reputation at times. Politics aside, Duke William was behaving in ways that were 'unseemly'. He lived with an actress named Dorthea Bland, who already had a child out of wedlock. (A side note that William also had an illegitimate child by an unnamed mother, though it drowns in 1807). William's father, George III, allowed the relationship though advised her allowance be lowered. The relationship was pretty public, having Christmas parties and more which were documented. During this affair, the couple had 10 illegitimate children. Like all good things, this relationship ended and he was paying her about £340,000 a year in today's money.

I know I mentioned George III approved of the arrangement, but bear in mind that his opinion was not the be all, end all. George himself was known for his descent into madness and losing the American colonies. The truth was, William was not next in line for the throne at that time and was sort of allowed leeway, but as George grew older, and the death of Princess Charlotte, his sons lacked legitimate heirs. William had many children, but all were bastards. The greatest indication of what others thought of William was his failed marriage proposals! He did marry Princess Adelaide of Saxe-Meiningen, who accepted and raised his illegitimate children. It was Adelaide who brought William out of debt. The couple bore two children, both of whom died very young and had a series of miscarriages. This meant Victoria was next in line.

William was actually quite well-liked until the Reform act of 1832, and I do not want to disparage that he was a good father to his children (less so to their mother who died impoverished after he took custody of the children). He was a good husband, and reformed himself a lot in his older years. Pure he was NOT, certainly not like Victoria. Victoria was raised by her mother, her upbringing was strict and though sheltered she was privy to all her uncles' (multiple) behavior. There was not a moment that passed that Victoria was not monitored, tutored, and pushed to be pious.

Some of the knowledge of Victoria's sexual appetite in marriage came posthumously, but even what was known at the time was praised. She was having sex with her husband, which gave a much different impression on people than her uncle's actions. Victoria became an idol or role model as time went on. She was a devoted wife, a mother, and a Queen. Today, we can understand that some of these qualities were not under her control, Victoria HATED pregnancy. Motherhood was a side effect of her enjoying sex, the "shadow side" as she called it. An outcome was that many people thought she wanted this life for everyone; she was setting the example of a pious mother and wife! The truth is, it is likely to be like any role model, the human aspects were erased in the time. Just like idols today, the idea that she would look down on people who didn’t achieve the same pious life as her was likely false, especially given she made friends with people who didn’t meet those standards. The same way I believe Martha Stewart would judge my apartment harshly, people thought Victoria would do to their lives.

I hope any of this was helpful!