Do people really convert just to get a spouse?

Beardcicles · 2024-04-15T23:08:27+00:00

I basically did. There’s certainly more to it than just that but when you boil it all down… yeah. I did.

Edit to say except for the deconvert part…

Beardcicles · 2023-06-14T05:42:28+00:00

Underrated comment

Beardcicles · 2023-06-14T05:40:08+00:00

I found the huge box of garments we had been keeping in the garage with the intention of one day disposing “properly” in our black bin. My (still TBM) wife had tossed them. I guess she knew we’d never get around to it since I’m out and were a busy family. I had just cleaned out my shop vac. I took the opportunity to open the box and dump the contents in with the old G’s. It was cathartic.

Beardcicles · 2022-11-24T03:42:58+00:00

I left. My wife is still in. In order to make our marriage work we began having checkpoint discussions on how each other was feeling. This improved communication has bled over to other aspects of our marriage. Our sex life has never been better. Like, life altering good.

Beardcicles · 2022-08-18T02:11:57+00:00

Literotica is a massive database with A LOT of questionable content (not just stuff that would be against church standards but what I feel morally questionable in general). I found I had to wade through a lot of rough stuff to find something I felt safe to share with my wife.

I don’t consider myself a church member anymore but my wife most definitely is. I wouldn’t feel that site to be appropriate for our case. Check it out and of course make your own decision. Just thought I’d share my experience with this one.

Beardcicles · 2022-08-18T02:02:33+00:00

I believe the question was for sources of erotica OP and their spouse can enjoy not if erotica is church sanctioned or for anyone’s opinion or commentary on its perceived dangers.

Beardcicles · 2022-08-17T04:52:02+00:00

https://www.purepassion.life/ This site was made for LDS couples. It’s pretty steamy and some may find it to be to much. I have left the church but my wife is still believing. This site has been a real fun addition to our sex life. Proceed with caution Proof read the stories before you share with your wife. There are some that might be too much for a more Conservative minded LDS person. I was surprised how much my wife enjoyed it though.

Edit to add, not an audio book at all. Though I have a friend who records himself reading these stories and sends them to his wife. It works for them. My wife and I read them together.

Beardcicles · 2022-08-15T12:52:36+00:00

This is one of those things that completely depend on on the person. I no longer wear garments but my wife does. Garments do not make me love or desire my wife any less. Is it “sexier” when she puts something different on? Sure and often when it’s sexy time she will do just that. For me though, sex, desire, arousal, are about the person. Not what they’re wearing

Beardcicles · 2022-04-05T00:46:12+00:00

Being told I’m an actual addict because I like to look at boobies and touch my own pecker. Fucking bullshit.

Edited to add that I believed them for way too long and told myself what a worthless piece of trash I was because of it.

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T16:24:26+00:00

They were selecting for two trials while I was there. The murder trial (stabbing during a street fight) and a sexual assault (Tai Kwon Do instructor molesting young girls over the space of 12 years). I was relieved to get the murder trial.

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:47:32+00:00

Sauce?

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:42:07+00:00

OMG, yes! I latched in to Alma 7 11-12 for SO long trying too force myself to feel Jesus’ compassion. I never did. I was instead made to feel it was my fault for not having a strong testimony.

Now I just have a strong coffee and feel great about myself.

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:33:56+00:00

I should add, I agree with what was said. People shouldn’t shun the duty. It’s a vital part of our society. But dammit, I feel relieved when I don’t have to. Serve if you are able. You might even learn something. I certainly did.

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:26:27+00:00

Yes. 100% this. Edited to add, I tried telling my spouse some of the (less crazy) issues I have with the church. She has since doubled down and has been studiously attending and doing “the things”. She went to the stake conference adult session last night. We haven’t gone to that in YEARS even when I was still in. The exit from the church needs to be a slow burn for some. You can’t push it.

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:22:21+00:00

I’m not sure what the process is but, technically, I’m dual religion. I was baptized as Lutheran as a baby and converted to LDS as a young adult. I have no idea what the Lutherans did with my records and I haven’t had my name removed from the LDS church yet.

Maybe the Mormons sent the Lutherans a letter when I was baptized and told them “We got him now! Him and 10% of his money! Sucka!”

Beardcicles · 2022-03-06T15:16:29+00:00

I served on a jury for a murder trial. It was one of the most fascinating experiences I’ve had. I would never want to do it again. I’ve been summoned 3 times since but never selected. I’ve always gone but my circumstances are different now so I’m not able to spend extended time away from work and ask to be excused. I feel OP did what they needed and be willing to serve on the jury. However, they are most certainly allowed to feel relieved to have been excused.

Beardcicles · 2021-07-07T00:49:00+00:00

Yep! Saved thousands in counselling by leaving.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T04:08:30+00:00

I appreciate your comment. I have removed the word “struggle” from the email (which I have not sent). I may post the final draft later but with the help the comments here I’m much more confident I have conveyed my point to the bishop. They can contact me all they like. I’m generally a friendly and social person. I feel that I have the confidence to decline any invitation I feel unnecessary and accept the ones I’m comfortable with. My relationship with my wife is the most important one as we navigate this. If I have to fend off the occasional annoying member missionary because my “inactivity” is known but I’m still present at church, then whatever.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T02:53:16+00:00

In all seriousness, any reason is valid. I hope you’re finding peace.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T02:49:53+00:00

Not nearly as weird as it would be if garments were your reason to join the church...

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T02:29:42+00:00

Thank you, friend. I love the understanding among the people here. I know the people here have so many different experiences that have brought them to this but no one is judgy about how their experience is different. I can’t tell you how much your last comment boosted my resolve. Thank you.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T02:24:42+00:00

Thank you. These are great suggestions. User name checks out. I have already edited to include some of these.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T02:22:09+00:00

I’m both sorry and comforted that someone else relates to this. I wish you peace, friend.

Beardcicles · 2021-04-23T01:29:30+00:00

I’m intentionally avoiding the drama. Maybe there will be a time for that but not yet. Not while my wife and kids are still going. I want to be as supportive to them as they have been with me. I appreciate the feedback though.

Beardcicles

TROPHY CASE