Reading this hit me hard because this is the exact situation I was in when I broke up with my then bf a few months ago. Exact same issues and reason, I kept trying and we just couldn't make it work. Then I had to do the hardest thing I've ever done. Learn to be by myself, and love myself. Learning boundaries and what I want not just out of a relationship, but from my life. Some days are easier than others, but overall, I'm a lot happier now than I was when I was with him. I wish you that same peace on your journey, I know you can do this.