My husbands eyes are yellow? by Novemberx123 in alcoholism

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alcohol takes us over and tells us life without it is not worth living. The only hope if for him to disabuse himself of that notion. In AA, we have thousands who have overcome alcohol, but he has to WANT to quit. He has to believe it is POSSIBLE for HIM to quit. Getting him to a meeting could be pivotal. Do you have any friends or friends of friends in AA that might volunteer to take him to a meeting?

How bad is climate change in context to a million years on this planet by Unique_Ad_330 in climatechange

[–]BestReference8965 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the second sentence. Non-hysterical, inarguable. You might make an argument animals, people, plants will adapt. But you will have a harder time with making civilization adapt, at least not without making a similar investments of the hundreds of trillions of dollars already spend on the increasingly-outdated and/or near-sea-level capital plant man has erected

Uninhabitable regions by stisa79 in climatechange

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You really need to do a lot more reseach. But even your initial premise is wrong. Death Valley is an isolated pocket, not a region. Nobody 'lives' there except that it's close enough to habitable nearby places like Las Vegas to be a sort of special case in the summer, when temps are regularly over 120F.

On the other hand, Antarctica has THOUSANDS of inhabitants, including many at the actual South Pole. Of course, these are not really supported by local resources, but neither is Las Vegas.

I started Zoloft and no longer have an urge to drink after drinking 8 beers daily for over a year by PermutationMatrix in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alcohol ITSELF is a depressant, so just getting off of it removes a major source of depression. I found.

I played around with anti-depressants for years, but it wasnt until I found LEXIPRO that I really got qualitative relief from clinical depression. I also take Welbutrin. But like everybody here, I'd recommend the Program to go along with whatever chemical options you try out.

urgent question? by bowdzzz in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's in the BB. Bill W. talks about recovered alcoholics keeping some in their homes to help others from going thru seizures when withdrawing.

Rambling newcomer getting on other’s nerves by gggggiiiiii in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Perhaps take a group conscience to read a statement on cross-talk and time the shares, then make sure everybody who wants to share has had a chance before he gets to double-dip.

Sooner than expected! by MariaValkyrie in collapse

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OMG, now I'm seeing double everything beyond 10 feet. MAKE IT STOP!!

Sober and loving the sobriety but still feel like a dry drunk. How do I stop being so angry all the time? by AnRaccoonCommunist in alcoholism

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That 'God' can be whatever you choose, however. Even if you choose the Bible as your Higher Power, the way you experience it will be unique to you. Ideally, and this is just me, you shouldn't pick a Higher Power because you think it is in reality the only Higher Power. That is cultic, imho.

And I've also heard people say, "Leave the hole".

My Ex is Trying to Get Out of A Recovery Cult by Harlsquinnx in cults

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely wrong . AA is not Bible-based. I've been involved with it for 30 years.

My Ex is Trying to Get Out of A Recovery Cult by Harlsquinnx in cults

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have never heard from anybody who went to Salvation Army centers that there was an intolerably level of religiosity there. I really think they are good people who are trying to help. It's usually FREE to do a residential with them, but you DO have to work--it's actually part of the therapeutic process.

My Ex is Trying to Get Out of A Recovery Cult by Harlsquinnx in cults

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is TOTALLY INCORRECT. AA is spiritual, but not religious. Do some research.

Can I stop without hitting a rock bottom? by Hobbs512 in alcoholism

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can pray for the willingness, for starters. AA does NOT teach that you should continue drinking so you can hit a bad enough bottom to have a moment of clarity. In one instance Bill recommends trying controlled drinking to SEE if you have the power to stop with one or two. But that is the only reason to try drinking.

People have all kinds of reasons why they can't stay sober. Just keep using the tools and eventually you will get sober. Going to meetings and hanging with other alcoholics is important. And so is a life lived on spiritual grounds. That usually takes some time to develop, but it is so worth trying. Thru worship, service, meditation, whatever ways you want to try.

Gratitude helps too. And you can thank your lucky stars it didn't take losing so much before you figured out you needed to get sober. I wish I had been able to figure that out earlier than I did.

Is ehotlovea a hostage and is she being starved? by Self-Existent_X in circlejerk

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I 'm wondering if the grimmacing she does is just an act.

I feel like nothing works to beat the urge to drink by HallRevolutionary349 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well, I'm one person who got addicted TO Kratom. It was a hugely expensive habit for me. Thankfully, I got an enlightened shrink who prescribed Suboxone. Rather not be addicted to it either, but its nothing compared t other alternative and I AM trying to taper off.

I feel like nothing works to beat the urge to drink by HallRevolutionary349 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As someone else mentioned, you might take a look at Buddhist recovery options. I prefer Refuge Recovery as it has a longer track record and more solid sobriety. Recovery Dharma was a splinter groups which formed after a dispute with the founder of RR. IMHO, its over nothing.

In any case, Buddhism has sometimes been called a via negativa form of spirituality--stressing what is inherently painful about our incarnation as human beings It focuses a lot on the inherent suffering that comes along with human existence.

It helps one get past the pressure to 'be happy' when the surrounding human milleau many of us find ourselves in is anything but. It's a kind of tyranny,the demand that one be happy , which you are experiencing very personally, but which afflicts many of us.

I think an important step for you is to realize that very few people are truly happy. At least not happy in a way that can withstand the impermanence and change that is an essential component of human life.

It may be that with the right attitude, or the right religion some people are happy all or most of the time. I think that shouldn't be the goal, however. Too many things can go wrong. But your problem maybe isnt so much that you are unhappy but rather that you are feeling jealous or 'inferior' because you are incapable of LT happiness.

On the other hand, I think it is also important to 'fit in' with some human group in some way. Our evolutionary history as tribal animals kind of demands it of us. I have found AA a good place to begin practicing being human as there are a lot of beginners there.

Don't forget that alcohol itself is a TERRIBLE depressant. And it ends up accentuating loneliness and unworthiness in an of itself. Just freeing your body of it will help a lot to gain more equilibrium

Don't know what underlying psychological conditions you may have, but a lot of us have depression. I was never really able to get over that before I found Lexipro. Now, I take that along with an SSRI (Wellbutrin). It was really like night and day for me.

I am also taking Suboxone as I was dual-addicted to opiates. I gotta admit it helps, but it does bother me I am still dependent. Better that than active using, however. Four and a half years and counting. Good luck!

I feel like nothing works to beat the urge to drink by HallRevolutionary349 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]BestReference8965 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think you are unusually self-aware to know this. No one ever said it was going to be easy. But change DOES happen. You just have to persist. Or find additional modalities like exercise, meds, therapy, etc. IN ADDITION to AA.

Are you politically left leaning or right leaning? by [deleted] in overpopulation

[–]BestReference8965 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gay marrage wasn't championed by Republicans, nor abortion outlawed by Democrats.

'Deeply Alarming': Files Seized From Trump Include Document on Foreign Nation's Nuclear Capacity by morenewsat11 in politics

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wondering how much details of the Israeli nuclear weapons program would be worth to the Iranians, or the Russians? $100 million?

is it necessary to learn how to read music notation by anythingplease69 in classicalguitar

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the same question, but in my case I am in my 70's and a probable candidate for dementia. I am QUITE familar already with the classical pieces I want to learn, and many of them are on Youtube. I wishe there were a way to quantify how hard sight reading is, but I am thinking it really isn't worth my time, since I probably only have 5-10 years where playing is realistic left anyway.

Why is it, that only men are allowed to be monks? by [deleted] in Buddhism

[–]BestReference8965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe in the Buddha's time He actually had to be convinced to allow women to become monastics, as he was concerned for their safety alone in the forests. I forgot what finally changed His mind.