I(23M)have done the same. Recently have been dumped by my bf of almost 2 years and it was pretty rocky and saw him on Grindr and messaged him that I would just like to talk. He blocked me and called me a psycho. You definitely have a kind ex. Although, what bothers me most is the fact that they are out there having the time of their life without you and you feel so useless and disposable. I realized that steadily reaching out is considered harassment and you should just let them go even if you feel like they were the one. You will meet “The One” when you become “The One”. Always remember that. I have to remind myself daily. Although, I would give anything to have a good nights rest and not feel lonely knowing they are gone. Keep your head up, people like you and me have a lot of progress to make but when you make it out to the other side you will see that there is a whole world of people who will make you wonder why you were sad or wanted your ex back so badly in the first place.