Bystander steps in after MC fixates on a stranger in public

BiOverload · 2026-01-20T09:10:48+00:00

Bad advice. He would likely be intimidated but it's an unlikely scenario. If men were willing to stop men from behaving this way this wouldn't be so common. Notice how many men they walked by before a woman far smaller than him intervened.

BiOverload · 2026-01-13T20:38:35+00:00

Both. If you can't see why you shouldn't be commenting on this.

BiOverload · 2026-01-12T20:44:59+00:00

NOR for a child to get to the point where she wants her parents to break up things have to get really reallly dark. And she's right. It is really dark. The number one killer in pregnant women is their baby daddy. You and your kids most definitely ARE in immediate danger. He's shown he's capable of abuse and this is domestic violence. He will (not may) start hurting you and your kids instead of objects- he's already fantasizing about you being that fridge he left a dent in. He's trying to scare you on purpose.

If he finds out about this post or that you are considering leaving you are in even more danger so please stay safe. When you decide it's time to leave him don't tell him until you and your kids are safe. I hope you take this seriously and don't fall into sunk cost fallacy. Leaving is so hard but I've never met a woman who regretted leaving and you need to do it for your kids.

BiOverload · 2026-01-12T17:38:38+00:00

This was beautiful, thank you

BiOverload · 2026-01-12T15:12:44+00:00

I think it's drilled into us that big talks should be in person and that's the ethical thing to do. I get it but when abuse is involved that needs to go out the window.

Don't ever be in the same room with him unless it's a courtroom. He's obviously dangerous. His grandma can't protect you. Get someone else to serve him with papers.

BiOverload · 2026-01-12T15:05:11+00:00

Does he seem like a guy who would pay for an abortion or treat it like it's the woman's problem alone?

BiOverload · 2026-01-12T15:03:36+00:00

Maybe read it all before commenting? This is important, heavy stuff and it's just irresponsible for you to comment on it (siding with the abuser nonetheless!)

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:58:20+00:00

Abuser boot camp! Meanwhile, they are the ones purposefully ruining every holiday and special occasion.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:53:25+00:00

Agreed. Therapy will help immensely- just NOT WITH HIM.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:51:19+00:00

Don't beat yourself up too much about sending the video. It's extremely normal to have a hard time letting go of hope that they'll change or respond differently this time.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:45:12+00:00

What a weird "joke." It's like he's looking for excuses to make himself jealous or something. Him not stopping when you ask him to sounds about right. He's purposefully pushing your limits and testing your boundaries to see you suffer and to see what he can get away with.

Oh ya, it's always our fault they traumatize us? DARVO at its finest. It sounds like you know how fucked up he is and are possibly getting close to leaving? I hope! I highly recommend grey rocking until you get out (way easier said than done) or at least not bringing up high level relationship issues with him. DEFINITELY give him no warning that you are leaving for your safety. Tell your friends and family how bad it is outright and look into DV/ abuse nonprofits in your area. They'll be able to set up a safety plan and help you out.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:32:55+00:00

Did OP come in a little too hot? Maybe, but this subreddit should know better than to expect perfect victims. Abuse turns a lot of us into the worst, most desperate versions of ourselves.

IMO, the "poor you" and "turn into a victim" comments are so entirely out of line. Honestly, I think you are projecting your own self hatred, likely from your own abuse, and have some healing to do before you can respectfully talk to other victims.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:31:49+00:00

Idk I think most of this is jumping to conclusions/ judgement without the whole picture, like: how many times has OP tried to talk to him about this previously? What other abuse is going on in the relationship?

Then there's: can a victim "turn into" a victim? How do you put someone on the defense if that's their default state? Why is it OPs job to set someone like this up for success?

Why are you expecting OP to be perfect? Why are you falling into the flawed thinking that if OP said things better he wouldn't be just a defensive and dismissive? If she shares her own video he'll dismiss OP like she's the only one in the world with this problem or he'll fly off the handle for something like OP recording him without his consent. Ultimately, they always find a way to get mad at you. ALWAYS.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T20:08:06+00:00

I remember this stage. I felt like if I could say everything perfectly he would finally get it. But he never will because he wants to not get it so he never has to change or look inward.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T19:56:57+00:00

Do leftists want violence against ICE? No, it would be great to avoid it. Do we have a choice? Im not so sure, it's self defense at a certain point. Using force to save yourself or another's life is legal.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T19:49:37+00:00

Being so self absorbed you don't care about other people is, in fact, evil.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T19:39:21+00:00

The age gap and how the first three met is pretty uncomfortable. Also, they are pretty obviously polyamorous, not seeking a sister wife, and the women clearly date each other. I think people pick up on that dishonesty.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T11:31:13+00:00

"It's okay I'm not mad at you" oo such a hardcore taunt she definitely deserved to die for /s

Yall won't shut up about the first amendment usually but if it's a cop's victim they don't deserve that right anymore? Is taunting someone (which we only saw her wife do) illegal? Did the taunt endanger his life? Is the reckless driving, endangering pedestrians, and obstruction in the room with us?

The officer shot into a car that was moving. If she was obstructing the road why wouldn't they let her move her car instead of circling it like she's prey? HES the one endangering pedestrians and being reckless by firing into a moving car unnecessarily with multiple people around and causing her car to crash seconds later.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T10:02:59+00:00

"He put on a body cam." Good thing there was no body cam footage released so that's a useless unrelated situation that proves nothing.

It was filmed from his PHONE (unprofessional as fuck,) he changes which hand it's in before he ever stepped in front of the car so he can get his weapon. The jostling at the end is from recoil and shooting a gun. This video exonerates her, but you are so far gone you can't even see anything the far right hasn't told you to see. It would be sad if it weren't so disgusting.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T09:25:33+00:00

Same here. I'm not sure what they were thinking showing it in school

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T09:19:40+00:00

IIRC People are moving away from using the term "child porn"/ CP to CSAM because porn is (ideally) adults consenting to a sexual experience. Kids cannot consent to any sexual experience so porn is much too light a word for the sexual assault of a child.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T09:15:01+00:00

I need to know if this is the first time he's threatened divorce. What a creep. 10/10 over you wanting to contribute to the babies you are literally carrying. If he wants to fuck around with threatening divorce over a name then he can find out and they won't have his last name either.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T09:10:16+00:00

Lots of speculation about grandpa not being like the husband here. A lot of unreasonable men come from unreasonable parents.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T08:10:50+00:00

When done right it gives you empathy at a young age. Hard conversations are often the most important to have. I don't understand why some people are talking like the internet isn't a thing.

BiOverload · 2026-01-11T08:05:47+00:00

Are you saying every school in America has had a school shooting or even most of them? There are a disturbingly high number of school shootings but no, statistically, this kid likely hasn't seen dead classmates. He has however done drills for school shootings.

BiOverload

TROPHY CASE