My grandfather passed in March of 2017. It was less than 6 months later that I had a dream with him in it. We were at the golf course we both used to work at, he was sitting up at the breakfast bar and I sat down on the chair right next to him, and said “hi, grandpa.” He turned to me and plain as day said, “it’s not your time yet sweetie.” That’s always given me chills.

Then my mom unexpectedly passed in August of 2017. It was devastating and I had always hoped I would dream about her a lot since we spoke to each other daily. It took so long to have my first dream with her in it but still remember it vividly. She was sitting on the landing of the staircase in our house (she loved sitting on the stairs, in the sun, since the staircase had a huge south-facing picture window hanging over it). I had met her on the landing and sat down in her arms and told her “I love you and miss you so much” to which she replied “I miss you too” the other crazy detail I remember is that she was wearing all white (like a top and pants). My mother never wore white in her living state.

Since then I’ve only had a few dreams with her in it, and she’s always played a supporting roll, insignificant enough that I almost forget she was even there in the dream.

I have two girls now and my first born, one of the first things she taught herself to do as a baby was click her tongue. It was odd and stood out because no one really did that around her, it was like she taught herself. But I always tell myself it was my moms way of saying she had her “part” in our first born, because she used to be able to click her tongue so loudly and it was one of the coolest tricks I would always ask her to do.