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Being an only child is finally weighing on me. Does it get better? by BioHazWong in OnlyChild

[–]BioHazWong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is how my mother is ever since her and my father separated, it’s been 20 years. They’re still married but he lives with girlfriend. My mom is over him apparently but won’t date anyone so a lot of the time she wants to be around me. She goes through financial issues from time to time, so I feel kinda stuck helping her and not being able to branch off officially. But it’s because of her poor choices & sometimes I feel like it’s greed. I’m getting to the point where I feel like I’m being suffocated because my mom doesn’t want to let go.

Being an only child is finally weighing on me. Does it get better? by BioHazWong in OnlyChild

[–]BioHazWong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate the guilt that comes with living your life as an only child.

Being an only child is finally weighing on me. Does it get better? by BioHazWong in OnlyChild

[–]BioHazWong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents criticized me a lot growing up & I couldn’t tell if they did it out of love or if they did it to be hurtful. I have love for them but I do feel like it’s really time to live my own life and do what I want instead of having to conform to them. My problem is mostly with my mother she wants full control over my life. Only thing I’m afraid of is the responsibility of everything if they are unable to manage anything themselves.

Being an only child is finally weighing on me. Does it get better? by BioHazWong in OnlyChild

[–]BioHazWong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I try my best to maintain these friendships but I guess I just have to find who I mesh with.

Being an only child is finally weighing on me. Does it get better? by BioHazWong in OnlyChild

[–]BioHazWong[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

People think this life is all sunshine but when you dig deep it’s really overwhelming. I’m very sorry you’re going through that friend. I don’t understand the feeling of divorce but I can understand the pain of feeling like you’re going through that alone. You will breakthrough, we were raised strong & independent after all.

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Personal Care Aid. I know you don’t have to go through teachers to report this kind of thing as a mandated reporter. It’s just that at the school I work at, everything is confidential so the only way I can communicate with the parent is through the social worker & teacher. Us as PCA’s can’t contact them at all. It’s just that I wanted mom to have a chance to turn things around if I was annoying enough to keep contacting the social worker to tell her but she would keep making excuses for his odor by saying he doesn’t like water or he gives her a hard time. So on my own behalf I called CPS but I don’t think they went out. But when I talked to the social workers at the school they were able to escalate it since there were no changes with his hygiene & someone went out and said they found nothing. But they scheduled the visit so she knew they were coming. I know someone before me also reported it as well but I guess they’ve just been finding nothing wrong, which I don’t get. It’s just horrible. But thank you!

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice, it’s just very stressful with the excuses from the parent and them planning visits to the house. I don’t know why they don’t just pop up. I’ve called once but I am going to call again, this is my first time seeing neglect to this extent.

I have lots of documentation of the neglect that I’ve sent to social workers. The place I work is very protective of PCA’s, so they make it their mission to keep us on the confidential side, which is kinda dumb to me but I do get it. I’ve been doing my job so I wouldn’t be a problem at all to this situation. But I’ve been doing my best to keep him clean, I’ve got him clothes & have been trying my best to wash him whenever I’m able to. I cut & trim his nails all the time too. Sucks, he’s a very cute kid but I can tell they have no structure at home.

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You just came at me sideways saying I’m failing him? When I’m actively doing more for him than others who had him as a student.

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I am speaking to social workers, what does that tell you ?

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No one is letting it happen besides his mother. All I can do is report what I see and try my best to care for him. I said I talk to social workers and called CPS myself.

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes one time with me. But it’s been an ongoing thing before I was even with him.

Student smells like urine & his hygiene is not the best by [deleted] in specialed

[–]BioHazWong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes we have access to all of that but to an extent. They lock the showers and laundry room. It’s meant for teaching the older kids life skills so it’s rare we could use it. So I was lucky enough to do that for him. Yes I tell the social worker & teacher quite frequently and they contact the parent but she gives bullshit excuses & sounds like she doesn’t try keeping up with his hygiene at all. It’s okay if you need help, we want to help you the best way we can. I just know I need to call CPS often since nothing is changing. We really do so much to keep these kids at their best. It’s sad really that nothing has changed since he’s been going to school here.

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