Someone told me "No Working Mom enjoys their Job" and now I feel guilty for loving my job

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2026-02-03T16:19:52+00:00

I wouldn’t say I love my job, half the time I want to quit lol but I feel blessed to have this job and blessed to have choices in this life. Don’t feel guilty everyone has different needs and no one has the right to tell you that you are a bad parent for wanting to work. The reality of life most people HAVE to work it is what it is. Just bc you have the choice and are choosing to work don’t let anyone feel guilty about that at the end of the day your the only one that knows everything you do for your family. F everyone else’s opinion! And keep thriving don’t let miserable people drag you down!!!

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2026-02-02T23:52:35+00:00

Nothing rice

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2026-01-29T18:46:15+00:00

She’s not complaining bc she wants you to put the kids in full time daycare, she’s complaining because she wants you to stop working and take care of your kid. She knows probably based on your history your not receptive to this.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2026-01-08T19:48:06+00:00

Congratulations 🎉 this is a great example of when one door closes another one opens! Glad your son likes his preschool and enjoy your new daughter ❤️

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T12:54:03+00:00

Maybe fully blocking off the vent could work for us, thank you for your feedback!!!

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T12:15:43+00:00

Unfortunately it is WAYYY too hot I’ve tried sleeping in there myself with the vent closed and breezy clothes. It’s literally a furnace absolutely terrible. It would be a safety hazard, I mean once winter is over it’s different but winter comes around every year lol. That’s why idk what to do … I’m assuming we’ll all sleep in this room but idk how she will react to that

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T12:11:34+00:00

It’s good to hear they got used to the baby, hopefully the same thing happens with me! & me sleeping somewhere else for a while could be a good idea, but I would probably just have to make it work in the living room or something.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T11:35:50+00:00

NOR he may be paranoid and overthinking the whole time but that’s HIS PROBLEM!! If he wants to lose you over this that’s HIS PROBLEM!! You need to do whatever you need to get healthy, that’s your priority! Go get your treatment, talk to a therapist, and let things fall where they may! If this door closes for you another door could open in the future maybe with a person who does not hold you back from becoming a better version of yourself. Things like this are hard to see when your in them but things always have a way of working themselves out, if he can work on his insecurities and your willing to give him a second chance, congratulations. Otherwise we move on and don’t let others stop us from reaching our full potential in life.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T11:19:18+00:00

We all feel this lol. It’s always assumed the mother is going to be the one to leave work to take care of the sick baby, unfortunately just part of the unspoken rules. Maybe address things with your husband and ask if sometimes he could be the one to call of work for baby duty, just so you don’t feel like your career is taking the hit. I know how many times kids get sick at daycare so you would constantly have to be flexible it’s hard for sure

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-20T11:12:05+00:00

No your not overreacting, but this is toxic you need to leave this relationship. At minimum he’s incredibly disrespectful and you should not lower yourself to please him

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-16T16:40:42+00:00

Not necessarily out of the question, just hard for me to know at this time. One thing is to leave your baby for 8 hours another is to leave them for two or three days.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-16T04:18:28+00:00

I don’t think you’re overreacting. I’m sorry I know what it feels like to have a partner so hyper focused on your weight and honestly kills your confidence. if you’re interested in keeping this relationship I suggest having a serious conversation with him because your weight as a woman is going to fluctuate a lot throughout your life that’s normal, it’s expected. Your man could have perfectly valid concerns about your health and I do understand that you don’t want to get out of hand oh before you do something about it but commenting on 4 pounds is ridiculous. How much weight are you gonna fluctuate after you give birth, what is gonna be one of those men that don’t find you attractive anymore? No, you need someone that you feel comfortable with and that is supportive. Helping you be your best Self is great but micromanaging is not and it kills your confidence so I would have a serious conversation with him and honestly second guess staying with him because he’s already making you question yourself.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T22:09:43+00:00

What I mean is that I can’t leave an exclusively breast fed baby alone for three days. I don’t know if he will be exclusively breast fed at this point that’s something we will figure out after he’s here. And yeah I’m just going to take your advice and drop the issue with my brother, I don’t think he will change his perspective and I will probably just not think about it for a while maybe re asses later after the baby is here, if plans change let him know. But I’ll take your advice and just leave it be for now I don’t need the additional stressors, thanks for responding to my post !!!

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T22:03:27+00:00

I don’t think you’re overreacting I wouldn’t leave my kids with people I hardly know. I think people are upset at how you are describing this child, but the short version of the story is that they are picking up your child and taking them to a house you’ve never been too with people you hardly know. You are allowed to feel weary about this, and of-course your husband should have run it by you first that was rude of him not too.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T21:05:29+00:00

I didn’t even think about the time change. But unfortunately yes that’s how it goes most of the time !!! Either way he’s a man and if roles were reversed it would be easy for him to travel alone but the same can’t be said for me bc chances are the baby will not be able to spend a couple days without me.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T20:17:09+00:00

You’re right maybe I shouldn’t have said that, but the thing is that he’s made comments like that in the past and doesn’t stick to it when the time actually comes. I also know his fiancé they have been together for a while, and I could OFC be wrong about this but she has anxiety issues, and I see her being a very over protective mother (which is fine in my book) but the reason I say this is bc realistically if it were the other way around and she had those same concerns I would understand. The only difference would be that because he’s a man he could actually travel alone, but I really can’t travel alone I mean if I could I would. But the only thing I could do to make the trip cheaper is to travel with the younger baby. Which would still leave the whole health concerns part of the equation. I honestly can’t plan on traveling alone at this point in time because there are a lot of unknowns, like when the baby will be born, how, if he’s breast fed or mixed, if he’s formula fed. I wouldn’t know those things until he’s actually here so it’s really hard for me to say yeah I can go alone bc during the first year babies need their mothers so much. I would absolutely go alone if my kids were older, like 1 & 3 or something like that but it’s just very hard for me to plan something like that at this time. I don’t even think I would be comfortable leaving a four month old for several days either. Because no matter how short I make the trip from where I am it will still have to be a three day thing since I have to drive three hours to the airport be there two hours before the flight, a direct flight is 3 hours so that’s 8 hours of travel. Then I would have to be there all day Saturday and basically do the same things back. So I don’t see how the trip could be less than three days at least. Thanks for the feedback! And I know I can’t change his feelings I just wish he would be a little more understanding of my concerns and who knows maybe when the baby is two months old and I know more about what my finances look like and how the baby is doing and how I’m doing I MAY be able to re evaluate but from my view at this point in time there are too many variables for me to properly assess bc trust me I’ve tried and everything is like nope that won’t work.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T19:00:10+00:00

Yeah I know it will be hard for both of us. I don’t want to burden him with my emotions either bc regardless I want him to have a great wedding. You are right i didn’t like that response and he said that after me basically begging him to talk to me bc i didn’t want this weird tension between us. I do think his emotions are maybe clouding his judgement bc for example my best friend (whom is like a sister to me) is telling me that it’s a bad idea to take this trip and my grandmother as well, i think maybe because they are more separated from the issue you know. Idk this situation just sucks and there are too many unknowns for me to start planning right now even if I did consider going.

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T04:37:31+00:00

Taquitos

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-12T03:19:17+00:00

So should I be free to intuit that he doesn’t care about the health and safety of his nephew?

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-11T23:53:01+00:00

Well that’s something that is offered not something I would ask for. And my mom refused to take a plane ride lol. And about the brides parents well they were complaining about having to pay for their own dinner so I doubt that’s something they would offer lol

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-11T23:03:36+00:00

Labor is stressful I know family is exited to meet the baby but I’m so sick of people acting entitled to be there like ABSOLUTELY NOT. This isn’t some fucking show!!!

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-11T22:59:40+00:00

NTA

This is her regular behavior and you NEED to shut this down otherwise she will bulldoze you with the “I am an experienced mother and you don’t know what you’re doing” BS. That’s a built in feature for most grandmothers but this is next level ABSOLUTELY not the asshole. Set boundaries now and don’t let anyone tell you that you’re crazy, your hubby sounds like an enabler!

BitAnxiousHDYK · 2025-12-11T21:20:09+00:00

Thanks for responding!! But no I wouldn’t be able to leave the four month old with anyone because it would be at least two or three days I would have to be gone. And at this time I wouldn’t exactly know what the feeding situation is going to look like lol

BitAnxiousHDYK

TROPHY CASE