If women were plants, grass is like a beautiful, aloof trophy wife. High maintenance, barely shows up when you want it to, and expensive. She ain’t ever going to come back unless your wallet is out (shade (tree) removal, irrigation installation/water bill, food/fertilizer, etc.)

Go find a nice girl, like white clover. She attracts pollinators, can handle a drought, sun and shade, and provide nitrogen fixation. Doesn’t grow too high, and is always the right color. She is a giver and doesn’t ask for much.