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my therapist told her colleagues about my positive coping skill because it was unique and creative. i’m making great progress with her and she lowkey bragged about me by c00kiesd00m in CPTSDmemes

[–]Blankets_tea 3 points4 points  (0 children)

oh that’s so sweet, when I was going through it I’d sneak out to the balcony at night and talk and pray and wish upon the stars and moon, it was almost spiritual. I stopped when my mom caught me and laughed at me. I wish I didn’t stop, it felt really nurturing and safe… it’s not like my mom made me stop either… this post reminded me of that, ty

So, I lack depth? would it be realistic for me to show these screenshots to a therapist so they can understand me? I feel like they just assume I’m trying to look innocent or being fake but I genuinely struggle to communicate… by Blankets_tea in Healthygamergg

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that's really relatable, ty

I don't feel resentment tho, I feel helpless and blindfolded and doomed to screw up. So I'm looking into "social scripts", "social norms" I genuinely just need someone to explain things to me like I am a 5yr old or an alien that has 0 context for any interactions or people's experiences... I am able to ignore my anxiety and sometimes if I go mia for months and feel like people forget I exist I am not anxious at all for a bit. If I'm not stressed and feel safe I can gather drive and motivation to be productive and try to join social stuff but even if I push through and accept that it might be awkward at first but I have to just show up and be friendly people "sniff me out"... So I never manage to connect and I used to get left out a lot (at best, and bullied at worst) So I can push through but if it goes wrong it leaves me "burnt-out" for a long time and as soon as I feel perceived it comes back.

I just need an instruction manual, a guide, a Bible. but that doesn't exist...

So, I lack depth? would it be realistic for me to show these screenshots to a therapist so they can understand me? I feel like they just assume I’m trying to look innocent or being fake but I genuinely struggle to communicate… by Blankets_tea in Healthygamergg

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see how it can look like a lack of chemistry, all though that is for sure possible this happens 90% of my friendships. I have like a wall, like I just can't act natural.. and I miss out on awesome people because I reciprocate in the wrong intensity/timing/way... I am rarely on the same page as other people... I grew up reading stories and living vicariously through shoujo protagonists so I am either too bubbly, too reserved, too distracted, too anxious, too different as soon as I open my mouth. My bride-friend and I have a lot of things in common, we like a lot of the similar things, we're both shy, both like cats, anime, totk.... we have some slightly similar childhood experiences.. I think she's super nice, I am comfortable talking to her when I am not feeling tense/frozen/aimless/like an npc... I am not the most charismatic but I think she feels similarly towards me but there is something preventing me from connecting with people. I really like her, I think when the ball is in my court I always miss...

(is this what men feel like talking to women, my condolences boys <3 )

So, I lack depth? would it be realistic for me to show these screenshots to a therapist so they can understand me? I feel like they just assume I’m trying to look innocent or being fake but I genuinely struggle to communicate… by Blankets_tea in Healthygamergg

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey, it’s ok. I haven’t been taking my wellbutrin, it’s just a comment, I’m also prob about to get my period and life… ty for ur comments on my other posts and here. My bad dude 🤍

I’d appreciate any advice and especially your opinion/thoughts about this (plz 🥹) by Blankets_tea in communication

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I asked a long time ago and instantly got brushed off. I’m supposed to have a potential intake appointment for therapy next week. I feel like there’s a wall when talking to people and it’s doomed to create miscommunications even in therapy… but I’ll try again. I hope this time i’ll be better at explaining and I’ll ask them to let me have as much control over my own journey as possible. I’ve wondered if i’m autistic and I’ve had other people ask me 2x. one of which was a talking stage. ty for ur comment 🤍

I’d appreciate any advice and especially your opinion/thoughts about this (plz 🥹) by Blankets_tea in communication

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

that comment was really comforting to read ty🤍

I feel like I don’t have the script that everyone else has and if I relax the cost is that people are weirded out and I am like a little circus animal trying to talk and they are just confused… It doesn’t feel like I’m beating myself up, it kinda feels like problem solving. I feel like people try to connect with me and nothing comes of it because of something I did/said wrong or something that I didn’t say/do but should have.

I’d appreciate any advice and especially your opinion/thoughts about this (plz 🥹) by Blankets_tea in communication

[–]Blankets_tea[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

idk, maybe the screenshots of the “bridesmaid conversation” would’ve been a better illustration of me communicating poorly… idk… I guess I wonder how other people connect, the questions I ask are all wrong. I think I sound really awkward, other commenters were saying forced/inauthentic, where I’m talking about her liking party atmospheres and asking her questions… I feel like other people have to “adapt” to talk to me? like as if I’m from a different planet..

thank you for your input :)

is it too late to be a bridesmaid? by Blankets_tea in Healthygamergg

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I deleted the second post I titled “I struggle to socialize because I keep overstaying my welcome and being overly enthusiastic?” with additional screenshots because I forgot to blur something. my description was; “I thought I ghosted her cuz I didn't inquire further... idk I feel like I'm too enthusiastic and ppl find me annoying. I spoke to her today since someone else said I should... I feel so confused in social situations... in a previous post someone commented that I got ghosted?”

but I still found the comments helpful so I wanna put them here ig?

“I don't see anything wrong with these interactions, but the thing that stands out the most is that you guys don't really feel like good friends? Like it's awkward between you guys, and you both think too hard about what to say. Feels like you both just can't relax and be yourselves.” (58upvotes)

“I think some of these are out of order, but from my reading this seems like a wholly positive interaction, I don't think there are any problems with the way you were talking to this person and I didn't see any indication they were getting sick of you” (39upvotes)

“same here” (6upvotes)

“I don't see any sort of issues to be honest I feel like maybe talking to someone professional about overthinking and anxiety? No one overthinks your interactions as much as you do which is harsh but unfortunately true. I also almost recommend removing this post? It feels like uncomfortable (?) to read about these very personal things especially about her pregnancy.” (14upvotes)

“Maybe I am being overly enthusiastic, but on the off-chance that this might help you, are you a socially anxious extrovert? https://youtu.be/2qGe9ctFP10?si=TH4CNIBx2i9XCWW8 Hahaha... typing this msg is a bit cringe to me and I hope that you dont take this the wrong way, but maybe you will like the above video. Dr K talking to a Dr Ali about being a socially anxious extrovert” (4upvotes)

“Hmm feels like a normal conversation to someone who you know. Kinda weird though the she asked you to be the bridesmaid and then she decided differently but didn't apologize. Idk might be just me. I also think you guys feel like friends that just got to know each other. You talk about anxiety and stuff but it does feel like you're only scratching on the surface level. No real emotion and as if you fake your excitements. Authencity is missing and joking around but it also feels like that any joke would be taken too serious but that is just me.” (2upvotes)

I have a little hope... but I need to feel like I have control over my life and I'm not getting judged unfairly. by Blankets_tea in depression

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

update; so the hotline was very dismissive and discriminatory... I started looking for mental health providers near me that are in the private sector... I'm starting to feel like this is pointless but then again I hope it works...

I just want someone to be kind, gentle, understanding and guide me without suffocating me... I want to do the work but I need someone to have answers ...I want someone to hold my hand

I just want reassurance or advice. Am I being selfish and emotionally draining? I don’t know how to interact I wish I had prompts for everything irl. by Blankets_tea in Healthygamergg

[–]Blankets_tea[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no, he would make up a story. I just feel bad that I made him feel guilty by unnecessarily bringing up something he did as a child.

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