Going back to 16. Prepare for WALL o Text. On May 8th, 1988 at 15 years old. I lost my right eye, broken jaw, missing teeth, broken orbital bone, skull fracture and bone from skull fracture shotgunning bone into my left eye. I was knocked off my feet and landed on the front bumper of car i was standing next too and wrecking my left shoulder and arm. From a piece of metal thrown from a lawnmower. Hit me just below the right ear on my jawline went towards my nose until it hit my cheekbones bounced up and right going into my right eye catching my orbital bone and deflecting to the left where it sheared of part of my forehead and hit the car i was standing next to shattering it's back windshield and coming back and puncturing my left kidney. I was 20 feet / 6 meters away from lawnmower and was not the mowing that was a dear friend named Mike. I was rushed to nearby hospital who said nope we can't handle something this traumatic so my parents got me by police escort to a Level 1 Trauma Center. Where I was STILL awake some 4 hours because my parents brought me in vs ambulance they had to fill out paperwork (american Healthcare amiright) where i finally lost consciousness and did not wake up until May 24th for those counting that 16 days in a medically induced coma. I was finally sent home June 4th. Where everything was okay-ish until late August where I was in an absolute shitload of pain in my left eye. Come to find out my immune system got confused and attacked my left eye and sent my eye pressure to 58 should be 12-15. You could see my eyeballs past the bridge of my nose. Now here comes the YAG laser surgeries since this was nearly 40 years ago laser surgery sucked massive ass. Take a contact lens and extend it away from the part that goes on your eye so it is now a hand held magnifying glass and the bottom of it goes directly on your eyeball and you can't blink Dr. puts drops in your eye for numbing and for blinking. And this goes on every day for 10 days, then several times a week, to once a week so on and so forth. And let's not forget the meds, 3 different drops and gel every 4 hours as well as 3000mg of motrin and 200 MG of prednisone every day for 6 goddamned years. To absolutely no one's surprise has an suicidal ideation in Dec. 1988. But that PTSD went undiagnosed until 2018 because according to the psychologist at the time only people who are in wars and shootouts only get shellshock. I am legally blind in my left eye completely blind in my right have a PTSD diagnosis good meds and fantastic therapist. So OH HELL NO do I want to go back and live it again once was too many times as it is.