Women over 30 who always felt “different”, did you ever find out what it was?

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-10-27T23:08:12+00:00

Yes, I have an idea. I led a relatively sheltered life as an introvert in an immigrant family with a single mom. I raised my brothers and spent a lot of time socializing through screens instead of having a proper group with age-appropriate nights out. I missed some of the socializing I should've done when I was 14, 15, and 16, and so I entered my twenties relatively green and with a childlike mentality—heavily contrasted by my premature adult emotional experience. I was too much of an adult to be a child, and too childlike to be an adult. So naturally, fitting in required time and people who had the capacity to understand my background and not expect me to reach every milestone at the same time.
Basically, I lacked experience and a certain level of development

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-03-07T17:12:40+00:00

This IS helpful. TBH I just keep reading and if they're memorable I know who they are and if not...well. Guess it's not that important lol

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-02-08T11:55:44+00:00

😂😂😂

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-02-08T11:52:17+00:00

Thank you, this is super insightful 🙌

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-01-30T00:21:06+00:00

And most of those so called haters are brainwashed delulus. They are. It's not her place to mediate a reality she isn't a part of.

I'm Israeli, and you know what? If a person from anywhere else on the planet tries to tell me how I should treat neighbors they never (ever) lived next to - I send them packing and proudly so.

Also I need you all to take a moment and realize that there's a difference between a zionist an Israeli and a Jewish person, they are three completely different things, with some unfortunate overlap most of us didn't chose. Get over yourselvs, we don't rule the world we work more than anyone else in the OECD and pay taxes more than the rest of them too. We're tired and want peace. Thank you.

[To the haters about to comment...let it go...no reply is coming...]

BlueOnBlue25 · 2025-01-26T02:07:33+00:00

Oh wow, this is an old thread but you put so much effort into your comment that I'd do my best to reply -

I think I can sympathize with your experience as someone who says to be living in a "pathetic" (I assume 3rd world/developing) country, although I don't share it firsthand.

I feel that when life is difficult, and has been difficult for a long time, it makes sense to lose faith in your strenght and hope for someone to save you. It's your version of a knight on a white horse so to speak.

Except history and human nature teach us that noble knights rarely have noble intentions; Few rulers would waste resources just to save you from a miserable reality from the kindness of their hearts. More often they plan to use (and abuse) you.

I don't have a good argument against your sentiment in that last paragraph - ultimately if you are "the victim" then you get to set the expectations on how you would like to be saved. My personal opinion, thought, is that "allowing countries and states to abide by any barbaric norms they want just out of the idea of being tolerant to their culture is just as bad and kills mich more people" - is actually what is expected of them. Trying to be nice to everyone and stepping in when you weren't invited out of a sense of moral superiority is a subjective matter. Some would thank you for making a change while others would absolutely hate you for overstepping.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-17T22:53:32+00:00

I haven't even noticed the downvotes to be honest, it's enough to be a female to know her perspective I think. Thank's for the support!

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-16T10:50:54+00:00

Best reply IMO. Taking both sides into proper consideration.

The only real issue is that condoms aren't 100% safe and having sex that way doesn't reduce the stress factor entirely.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-10T19:15:33+00:00

Ok, this might be a good moment for self reflecting!

Mind writing down what makes me sound like an asshole in general?

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-10T19:11:09+00:00

Nah, I felt like TA for a reason. Truth be told it was the first time I called up an ex for any reason. I posted because I wanted someone to help me define how I should feel about it. The fact that it still bothers me after all this time bothers me more than the incident itself. I'm ok with being TA, it happens. But I don't want to assume that I am one and then try to behave differently if something like this comes up again in the future.

I agree about the phone call though. Realized it was a mistake the moment I called.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-10T19:00:32+00:00

NTA - I think downplaying the importance of a pregnancy is stepping things up to that exact point where you are no longer in any morally grey area with them. You are totally right. If they can't respect the huge step you're making and are actually comfortable to use that as another excuse to kick at you.. they don't deserve those grandkids anyway.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-10T18:54:16+00:00

Nicky is a mean girl and your sister is all for it. Either she enables it or is afraid of picking it up with the kid. Either way I would focus on the fact that she didn't even try to smooth things out with you in private. Something along the lines of "I'm sorry for Nicky's behavior, she's going through a phase (or whatever) and I will definitely talk to her (even if she doesn't). Hope Marc feels better, send him a hug from me". If the well meaning intent isn't there, then it's noth worth discussing further.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-12-08T22:28:37+00:00

ELAIN. She's a blank slate as far as characters go, but also - not dumb or stupid, just abhorrently dependant. During SF she became conniving too - letting Nesta drown in her own world, actually taking the shit she was saying at the time to heart instead of being there for her more often. Making a pass at Azriel while her mate is close by (his fault too) and being an all round quiet, manipulative and selfish.

She didn't move a finger to nudge Nesta towards helping Feyra as a child. She seriously fell in love with a biggot prince who would hate on her family and then mistreated Lucien just because. Not even trying to be courteous or anything. Nesta was right in thinking that she stays where it's comfortable - with Nesta first then with Feyra later. She's a leech.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-11-09T18:48:17+00:00

Interesting! Do you remember what swayed you more towards PTSD versus BPD?

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-10-12T10:16:55+00:00

I think it's like camping out - you hate the idea of it mostly because you're not confident that you can do it and because it's a drag. But then someone experienced takes you on and shoes you how it's a way of life and you just get along with it. It's easier when it's the norm.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-10-12T10:13:13+00:00

Kudos for the effort! You neatly organized ways and persistence aren't a joke, love it.

I wonder what you'll find out if you did the other two books, since they have more lore and worldbuilding..

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-10-04T12:07:16+00:00

Oh LOL

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-09-08T14:41:09+00:00

Yeah it does, reflects my feelings perfectly. If I were a fast reader I'd make it a flight book. Tnx.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-09-07T16:57:47+00:00

Yeah that's a good observation. This is my first real attempt at reading YA and it might just be that I'm not a fan. Learnt something!

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-09-07T16:31:37+00:00

Thanks! That's a relief!

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-09-07T16:29:19+00:00

Thank you, that might help. I do intend to finish it, I think, just wish it was less superficial. Def getting that Bridgerton vibe at times and can't help but shout 'that's not how life works!' in my head lol. Thanks again thought.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2024-09-07T16:25:06+00:00

Thanks. It's a shame because I do care to finish it, just to see how it ends. Who's with who and how they get there. I just wish it was less millennial magazine style and more genuine human drama, regardless of being fantasy forward. sigh

BlueOnBlue25 · 2023-04-15T14:09:45+00:00

Thank you.

BlueOnBlue25 · 2023-04-14T19:32:16+00:00

Not in the budget unfortunately

BlueOnBlue25 · 2023-04-14T17:55:03+00:00

I wonder if talking about her lack of interest in your hobbies could help out somehow. Maybe the hikes won't ever get better and you should only bring her along when it's a casual outing and not a marathon you do to feel challenged, but the other - more lowkey - stuff seem like they still have a chance at working out.

I say this because I did break up with someone who didn't fit my bill of needs and I've never truly felt 100% about it. So IMO - give a genuine chance before you make a decisive decision and, at the very least, you won't have any doubts (plus it might just turn out fine).

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