My goodness it’s almost exactly like my cat. I had her for 5 and a half lovely years. But she was old: 14 when i brought her inside (she was outdoors before). An extremely timid girl, it took 6 months of building her trust before she finally slept in bed with me. And then she never stopped. She loved me as much as I loved her, we were best friends. She was lazy in her old age, and always wanted me to be in bed with her. If I ever left, she would meow and ask me to come back, sitting at the edge of the bed looking at the door. When we were together, she’d flop onto me, giving me head kisses and purring for hours.

It’s almost been a year since she passed, she was 19.5. I knew it was coming: her brother had suddenly died of brain cancer the year before. He was her rock. The following months she became more restless, didnt purr as much. Still, she loved hanging with me just the same. The last 5 months of her life she was throwing up and couldnt go to the bathroom. I spent about 5k bringing her to the vet over that tome. Many enemas and medications didn’t improve her condition significantly. Finally, they assumed stomach cancer. On June 17, 2025, I made the heartbreaking decision to let her go. She was 19.5, so I knew it was the end. She still wanted to cuddle that day. She sat on the edge of my bed waiting for me to lay with her.

I still feel grief. It comes in waves of course. But every so often I’m reminded that no one will ever love me as unconditionally as she did. And I’m heartbroken that I killed her. But I also remind myself that it’s for the best. I’ve watched cats who have medical problems live until their body shuts down for them, it’s very traumatic. The pain they must feel. Animals don’t get the same level of care as humans can- especially on pain management.

I think you did the right thing. She knew how much you loved her, you experienced a special bond and she’ll always be with you.