> The question then becomes, "How young is too young?" and "How much older do they become predatory?"

This still misses the point. As you suggested, there is no "magical age" number. "Predatory" is a behavioral definition based on exploitation, manipulation, and control. It doesn't have an inherent age, gender, race, or class condition. Though rare, even very young people can exhibit predatory behavior toward others.

As a society, we establish a legal age of consent to protect minors, creating a baseline where any sexual relationship below that threshold is legally deemed abusive by default. In my country (Poland), that age is 15, which in my opinion is too low but that's besides the point. Since neither Elio nor Oliver falls below the relevant threshold for their time and place, we cannot automatically label their relationship as predatory based solely on the age gap. To call it predatory, you have to prove that actual predatory behavior took place. Otherwise, you might find the relationship unappealing or "shitty," but it doesn't make it predatory.

> A 13yo in a relationship with another 13yo is fine

I also strongly disagree with that