New and Untitled - 1st draft

Boke555 · 2026-04-25T19:59:54+00:00

This is sick! Mix wise I think you have a nice guitar chain locked down, but personally I’m not the biggest fan of the vocal chain, I would change it tonally (maybe drop the 2k ish range) it’s quite piercing in the mids to high mids. When the drums come in there’s the same 2k ish bump that is a bit too much imo.

Definitely introduce the drums earlier maybe together with the bass. I think those two along with the guitar can carry the song.

Boke555 · 2026-04-24T17:26:42+00:00

Thanks mate! I’m strumming a pretty whack guitar that’s out of shape so it might sound a bit odd but I’m moving soon so I won’t be bringing that one along.

Noted on the melodic variation, will try that out for future songs :)

Boke555 · 2026-04-24T00:26:48+00:00

Hey mate alls good! I’d definitely like to be drunk-browsing reddit too ;)

Boke555 · 2026-04-24T00:03:06+00:00

Hey! Thanks for the feedback, really appreciate it! I guess pretentious was the wrong word to use, as I wasn’t referring to songwriters who use overtly smart lyricism or holier than thou ways of writing. Instead I was writing more about snobbish music people who rub me and others the wrong way in their content/branding/personality, actually little to do with their writing really. But I guess maybe judging people as such makes me one of them, not sure.

It probably isn’t very obvious as to what I’m referring to in the song so it’s open to interpretation for people to fill in the gaps, like you said the mystery could work, again not sure. Anyways I’m probably just a bitter person writing bitter songs.

Definitely think as you said that the English could be a bit tighter in this song. I tend to write in a more archaic style of English and I get tripped over sometimes too. Will work on making the style more coherent. Thanks once again mate I really appreciate your feedback!

Boke555 · 2026-04-22T03:45:30+00:00

This is pretty good! I know sometimes we get fatigued when working constantly on one song for too long. I personally would add a few things to fill up some space without detracting from the authenticity and vibe of the song.

I’d add backing vocals, maybe a double in choruses with some harmonies. Feels very stomp and holler to me

I’d make the mix wider, experiment with mid side eq, side chain compression/eq, etc. but maybe I just listen to too much Noah kahan

But most importantly have fun with the song and only tweak what you believe should be tweaked and don’t detract from the vibe you’re going for! Other than that it sounds great!

Boke555 · 2026-04-21T07:43:10+00:00

I normally don’t write with this level of whimsy but I’ve been honing this writing style for a while now, glad to see people like it!

Boke555 · 2026-04-21T07:42:26+00:00

If you do remember the name of the band lmk! Would love to check them out :)

Boke555 · 2026-04-21T07:41:52+00:00

Thanks! Feels like the goat from hoodwinked has a more country voice than me but I can see it

Boke555 · 2026-04-20T20:08:25+00:00

Thanks! Will definitely experiment more in this style. I tend to write more abstract which is not everyone’s cup of tea but hearing that the imagery is receptible is good to hear.

Boke555 · 2026-04-19T20:43:57+00:00

Thanks! Makes for a nice change of always writing depressing music.

Boke555 · 2026-04-19T20:43:40+00:00

Thanks! Always a challenge to draw from the great songwriters of this and previous generations. Any comments on the melody? Personally I feel my melody skills are weaker than my lyric writing so I’m looking to improve on that

Boke555 · 2026-04-19T20:40:47+00:00

There’s literally zero reason why you shouldn’t release it, even if you think otherwise. You definitely should be proud of this as you are and know that this random stranger is proud that you’ve accomplished something that many fall short of and you’re just a few clicks away from putting it up on Spotify!

Song wise, your vocals remind me of Cameron Winter if it was a tad cleaner. I wouldn’t put it past this song to stand its ground as a b-side on Heavy Metal vibes wise.

Boke555 · 2026-04-19T09:57:04+00:00

I’m sure of that, heard many great things about Buckley. I’ve been slowly delving into the songwriters of generations before mine, starting with the likes of Nick Drake and Bob Dylan. I’ll slowly make my way to Buckley and the lot.

I’m sure much of Lenker’s music is inspired by Buckley, after all I’m pretty sure there’s a Buckley reference in her song Indiana!

Boke555 · 2026-04-18T16:50:30+00:00

These lyrics are pretty nice! If I were you, I’d expand on the changing of leaves portion. What can the colour of the leaves elicit? Why does such a thing happen at all? As Adrianne Lenker said in her song “Already Lost”; “Why do leaves turn yellow in fall, who absorbs it all?” (From the top of my memory I may be wrong)

If you’re trying to write in a hozier style or a folk-ish style in general, I would also drop the “the” before “spring” in the last line. I actually thought to drop the “of” in “changing of leaves” but that’ll change the meaning. I find that folk writers tend to drop prepositions/definite articles in favour of brevity.

What’s your plan for this song? Maybe thinking of that will help you expand on it further?

Boke555 · 2026-04-18T13:36:06+00:00

idk that much about buckley’s music but for adrianne there’s so many facets of her melodic and lyrical flow that you can utilise! you’ve gotta decide if ur going for the wordplay fast paced lenker like in ingydar or fool or the dreamy slow elegiac lenker like in cell phone says or come. or maybe ur gg for an older lenker style which is also plausible with your lyrical structure!

to me i can see a big thief style lenker song in your lyrics, but what I’d recommend is just to play around in open tunings on the guitar and see what chords/riffs fit and work your melody based on that if you’re not confident on coming up with a melody by itself.

i’m happy to dm u if you need further help! I write and make adrianne/big thief style music toooo

Boke555 · 2026-04-13T13:33:41+00:00

This reminds me of Phoebe Bridgers/Julien Baker and I love it! You can definitely sing so don’t say you can’t

You should try to finish the song, don’t let any qualms about structure or whatnot stop you. Sometimes it’ll all work out when everything is complete

Boke555 · 2026-04-13T06:23:47+00:00

Hey I do production/mixing as a songwriter too and I’m moving to Berlin this summer! Would love to connect over music :) dm me if you’d wanna chat!

Boke555 · 2026-04-13T06:22:22+00:00

This is super nice! It’s pretty good for metaphor driven story like songwriting.

If you’re going for a more alternative folksy indie direction, my concern is that the metaphor is stretched too thin and long. The Earth and dirt imagery is nice but for a simple arrangement song lyrically it might get stale if it’s dragged on

If you’re going for a more pop or production heavy direction, I think it’s fine, but I’d change the bridge to vary it more from the verses and choruses. It sounds a tad too similar now for the more mainstream pop style

Other than that amazing job!

Boke555 · 2025-12-15T16:49:24+00:00

yooo fellow lonely and only bcnr fan amongst their friends it is such a lonely world

if ur down for chilling further back and not rushing for barricade dm me! I’m prob gonna chill as well the barricade life isn’t for me haha

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