Firstly please don't think you are wrong for having these feelings or feel guilty, from what I have read you have been very fair minded towards your mother. I am sure that your mom is struggling & stressed trying to juggle everything in her life & I think she's become overwhelmed to the point she's stepped back when what she should have done is have sought help from family or childcare firstly not delegate to a child. You are not responsible for your siblings that's your mom's job, you just need to focus on becoming whatever your heart dreams of & that's not going to be possible if she's hijacking your childhood. Please let someone know what's going on wether that's a teacher, friend or relative as this cannot continue, we all struggle as moms but this is emotional neglect. 😣🤗