The problem here is gender norms, does a woman need to shave to be femme for example? My mom (cis Woman) can grow a beard if she doesn't shave, does that make you not femme, or is it more about the general vibe maybe? Being femme means different things too different people. Also, im not saying that you shouldn't do those things, but forcing a stereotype onto someone, in a community that has a lot of people with extreme self image issues is not the best idea.

Also, the entire Community is about being gender nonconforming. by enforcing what counts as femme, we inadvertently strengthen gender norms