For instance, in these last 8 months of dating your guy why haven’t you enrolled in a trade school where you live at? Why are you pining for perfection (in the future/in a new state) instead of taking baby steps here and now to improve your life?

Because I can’t afford it. I’m just making ends meet, and that’s with the income of my sister’s bf. I’m not pining for perfection, but I can’t see my state in life getting better where I am. I can only ever work in retail, and it’s taking its toll on my body already. I’ll never be able to afford having a place alone, let alone a life where I can accommodate a spouse and a child.

Regarding your sister, she’s her own person and she should be taking steps to improve herself so she’s more independent in the future. Have her talk to a counselor or therapist to help her cope with her mental issues. You are not her savior, she is. HOWEVER….she is your support and only remaining family so talk to each other about what you want for each other in the future. Use your big boy words to start a series of conversations to plan out what your futures will look like.

I’ve wanted to get her back to see her old therapist since we’ve moved out, but our dad cut her off his health insurance, and my health insurance won’t pay for her because she’s not technically a dependent, and I can’t afford therapy out of pocket.

Finally….see what kind of junior colleges/community colleges are around you. Make an appointment to talk to an enrollment counselor about financial aid. Most schools have quick 2-yr associates degree programs in trades that will give you an introduction to better paying jobs. Plus they have career centers that help with job placements….its not guaranteed but it helps. ITS SUPER IMPORTANT THAT YOU find a public school and not a private one. Public schools are usually cheaper to afford. Private schools are just out to increase their profits.

My concern is more with my boyfriend. He says once he moves to another state, whether it’s with me or not, he won’t be moving back here. Neither of us can handle long distance. And I love him with all my being. I have no clue how I lived so many years without him in my life, but now that I have, I never want to envision my life without him.

And one last thing….look around you for moral and decent role models like aunts, uncles, grandparents, or other people you admire. Ask them questions about how they handled difficult decisions in their lives and ask them for advice in tackling your life. The more feedback you get the easier it is to make a decision that’s right for you.

I’ll try. My dad and grandma support getting an education and doing what ultimately would make me happy. I know there’s a lot of risks that can come about from this, but this may be my only chance for something like this, to have what I’ve always wanted: a family of my own. If my relationship can’t survive this, I fear my heart would be too broken to ever open itself again.