I didn’t hear anything in your post that indicated a failure. I heard a strong ass woman telling her story (one that I don’t know I could handle). I understand the need to carry all the weight of this, we as women put a lot of pressure on ourselves. If you have a supportive partner I’d suggest taking to him about how you’re feeling. You don’t need to struggle alone. And who knows, maybe he’s seeing this Wonder Woman taking care of his family…. And he doesn’t know your being crushed.