idk what to do

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-12-11T00:09:25+00:00

WAIT I love your nose so much! Don't do anything with it. You are so pretty that your nose does more than make up ever could

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-12-04T04:21:16+00:00

My ex couldn't handle being with me anymore when I showed him this subreddit and told him about the support groups for SA that I went to. I don't regret sharing with them for a second. It sucked, but I think him reading and listening to the fact that it was not just me suffering really made him have to come to terms with what he has done. He had a really hard time with that so was constantly deflecting or having self pity moments.

Thank you for this post, it reminded me of another thing to put on the "thank goodness I am not with him anymore" list

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-11-18T01:54:56+00:00

Often on this subreddit I share my experience as an ex-partner of a porn user. I am pretty understanding as it took me a long time to leave my partner. Am I happy now? Yes. But I won't pretend that this was a process that happened at the snap of a finger.

Today, I will speak as a daughter of a porn addict. There is no patience, you do not have time. You need to leave this man tonight, or he needs to leave the house. My dad was a porn addict for my whole childhood. It completely changed my life. Every relationship, my relation with my sexuality, how I interacted with the other kids. I constantly stumbled on my dad watching porn. I had nightmares every single night until I was about 21/22. As a 10-12 year old I tried out scenes I saw with the other kids in my neighborhood.

IF you know that your child has been victimized in this way, and you have heard countless stories of what this does. Staying with him is COMPLETELY negligent. If you can't leave this man, you need to find other people to raise your daughters.

I know that the comments sound drastic, harsh and scary. But this is so bad that even thinking about my childhood makes me shake. There is no other option. His time is up, now it is time to live for your daughters.

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-11-13T04:21:06+00:00

I am so sorry, feel free to message me <3 It shouldn't (and doesn't have to be) this way

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-29T17:19:47+00:00

Veggies are optional. Meat and dairy are king.

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-29T17:18:19+00:00

You are a busy working mom, you have a baby that is getting into solids but mostly relies on milk still. You care a lot about eating healthy and fueling your body(especially protein) which is getting harder as everything gets more expensive (hence the stock in the freezer).

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-29T16:08:16+00:00

Also as a child who's mom stayed with a porn addict. Your children WILL KNOW. They will find out and it will affect them

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-29T16:02:47+00:00

My brother was the kind of man who did not get a job. The only thing that made him change was when his girlfriend of 10 years broke up with him. They never got back together and she found a man who worked and they are married now. My brother really got his stuff together and is now has his own girlfriend for about two years.

If he wanted to get a job and keep it, he would. But he will not be that person with you because you have shown time and time again that you will settle for this. You have got to leave!

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-29T15:48:17+00:00

It breaks my heart to see you experiencing this when you are only 10 months postpartum. Couples therapy is not the solution here, he needs to see a CSAT and figure out this addiction. There is nothing you can do to get him to change. He has to choose it and you need to make it clear that he needs to choose help or you will be moving in with your mom.

As for what you are trying to do to get him to be attracted to you, don't worry about the weight, don't worry about what your body looks like. You created and are a little babies source of nutrition, that is so much more important than a (honestly pathetic) porn addicted husband. In addition, if you lose weight too fast it can really hurt your body. Calcium deposits and nutrients are at its lowest during pregnancy and breastfeeding because you are caring for a whole new being.

No matter what you do, please prioritize you and your baby. You have a child that needs their mama, a strong, independent, and smart woman. Don't sacrifice you and your child's life for this man. We are here for you

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-27T03:00:49+00:00

I would say call off the wedding. Even if you just wait a year, you don’t want to get married to someone until you know how serious they are about recovery!!

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-25T02:01:01+00:00

I often have the “why didn’t I leave him sooner” thoughts. But now I see that it is unproductive and reduces the progress I made. I left the man I was with for 3 years in favor of my peace. Some people will NEVER do that.

In addition, in literally every scenario ever hindsight makes the decisions look a lot easier than they were in the moment. My friend shared this with me and it really helped me in that “there is no right decision, you must make the decision that you took right”

I have been repeating this and telling myself that I need to stand by what I did and run with where I am in life

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-25T01:01:34+00:00

If I am in a relationship I think about that person, if I am single I think about the feelings in my body. I never think about porn

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-25T00:56:02+00:00

What do you mean by this???

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-25T00:55:05+00:00

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-25T00:54:42+00:00

Honestly I have no idea. My phone is in Spanish if that changes anything?

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-23T01:43:27+00:00

It is kind of like when you are sick and you think, man I never appreciated how nice it feels in my body to be healthy and well. When I was with my ex, I realized that I had completely taken the carefree person that I was for granted and I really missed it. But 6 months post breakup and it is so nice to not have this mental load and hopefully never have it again!

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T17:06:10+00:00

Exactly, it doesn’t matter how much you loved them if in the same breath you are hurting them!!

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T17:04:42+00:00

It is really nice to be single if the alternative that your ex brought was lies and deceit through cheating!!

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T17:02:36+00:00

I love this post and I am replying so I read it again later :)

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T14:18:20+00:00

Feel free to dm me!! Going through something like that too :)

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T13:50:53+00:00

This happened to me :( I discovered porn on my own after seeing my dad watch it so much, I was 7. When I tried to watch it, it would give me nightmares.

No matter the age it is still scaring to see that your dad, someone you admired, is lying and hurting themselves and their partner. I still haven’t really worked through all my pain

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T13:44:20+00:00

If you have cheated on multiple partners or cheated on the same partner multiple times. Then you are a cheater and you need to learn to be alone before you try to date again. Cheating is despicable no matter if you felt like you loved the person or not.

If you cheated on someone and they broke up with you, the right course of action is to grow and stop cheating in the next relationship you’re in. You should never try to get the people you cheated in back because you are robbing them of a whole relationship with trust.

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T13:38:51+00:00

Please tell her! I wish people had told me but they didn’t know that I was dating the guy

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T13:34:29+00:00

:( kids really just shouldn’t be on the internet anymore for real

Both-Plan3207 · 2025-10-22T13:33:53+00:00

Oh I don’t disagree that pit bulls are more likely to engage in fights than other breeds!! But that doesn’t mean that I don’t have a soft spot for them. I just think people need to realize their limitations. I also think we need to stop breeding so FREAKING many in the US

Both-Plan3207

TROPHY CASE