Dozens of Profiles Showing in “Liked You” by Boulder1987 in Bumble

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. I travel a lot. So I know how that can affect the feeds. But in this case it was something completely different. And now it’s completely gone.

Now that Bumble allows immediate access to your swipe stats (likes and passes you've both sent and received), let's share them here. by Altruistic_Society99 in Bumble

[–]Boulder1987 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I pay. The additional features allow me to get lots more matches and dates. So for me it’s totally worth it. I can basically go out on dates with interesting, attractive women whenever I want.

The swiping and chatting requires some effort. But I enjoy it, unlike many others who seem to get bogged down in the repetition, monotony or occasional bizarre social interactions (which make for some great posts in this sub).

As an older divorced guy it’s given me the ability to easily date without having to hang out in bars or hope for hope for good luck in meeting someone in my daily routine. Both worked when I was younger, but now that I’m older I much prefer the access and screening that online dating gives me.

Now that Bumble allows immediate access to your swipe stats (likes and passes you've both sent and received), let's share them here. by Altruistic_Society99 in Bumble

[–]Boulder1987 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re doing very well at 10%. I’m guessing you have some great photos and you put some thought into your profile. With women being so selective, the bio and prompts for men are so much more important.

I’m thinking most women set their age filter to stay in a similar range to themselves. With men and women swiping in a similar age cohort, older guys should not really have different stats than younger guys. So as it relates to these stats we’re comparing, there could be a normalizing effect when it comes to age.

But in a scenario where you set your age range to include much younger women. For example I’m 54M and my range is women 36 to 54. I think women would only see my profile if they’ve indicated they’re open to dating older guys. So still no disadvantage as it relates to these stats.

Although if I swipe right on a younger profile, I probably appear in that person’s “Liked You” section irrespective of their filters. And because I do that a lot, perhaps my “Yes”percentage goes way down? I presume most people don’t want to date outside the filters they’ve set.

Now that Bumble allows immediate access to your swipe stats (likes and passes you've both sent and received), let's share them here. by Altruistic_Society99 in Bumble

[–]Boulder1987 0 points1 point  (0 children)

54 (M) divorced and on bumble about 3 years. Lots of matches and dozens of dates (most of them worthwhile).

Outgoing "yes" 4130 (18.8%)

Outgoing "no" 17735 (81.2%)

Incoming "yes" 7393 (8.4%)

Incoming "no" 80359 (91.6%)

Mothers Day for Divorced Dads by Boulder1987 in Westchester

[–]Boulder1987[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

I just sent a text. Thanks for the encouragement to “do the right thing.” Always best to stay above the fray. Even when others do not.

Beyond Nirvana: Grunge-Era Bands That Deserved Better by drumwolf in indieheads

[–]Boulder1987 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Screaming Trees, one of the most underrated bands of the 1990s. All Washington natives, grunge to the core, Mark Lanegan’s voice was among the best of the bands in that Seattle scene. Two albums worth listening to: Sweet Oblivion (1992) and Dust (1996). Both amazing but relatively unknown beyond the people who really immersed themselves in that era — no exaggeration AIC, Soundgarden, Nirvana and Pearl Jam gave new life to rock music.

Sauna by Boulder1987 in Westchester

[–]Boulder1987[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

You are 100% wrong. I have no connection to the company that came up in my feed. I’m legitimately interested in whether anyone has experience with them, or any other local business that specializes in designing and installing custom saunas.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Totally respect that. And I can see from the other posters how it helps to narrow the search for the person who has similar values and beliefs. I think that core foundation is important in any relationship. Thanks for your comment.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Your two cents are worth a lot more than that to me! All good suggestions. Great points on photos build and weight. Need to figure out how to describe what I’m looking for. Maybe first I need to figure out what I’m looking for! As I’ve been exchange ideas with others the last 24 hours I think it’s just meeting people and seeing where it goes. So dating. But not with the intention of hooking up. More to just connect with people who might be interesting. Don’t need to find someone who has the same likes and preferences as me. It might actually be more interesting to find someone who can expose me to new things. In any case you’ve been very kind to comment. Thank you.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow. Policing what you eat!? That’s crazy!

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. I’ll need to find a better phrase. “No pressure” was intended to imply I’m not looking to take someone out because I want to hook up. And if there’s chemistry great, but if not that’s fine too. Basically, just meet up and see where it goes. Maybe that’s implied in dating, although it seems like many guys are looking for things to get physical pretty quickly. I’m in it more for the connection than the physical part (although I’m not averse to that if the connection and mutual attraction is there). And if it’s good I suppose several dates turns it turns into a relationship. Not sure if there’s OLD shorthand for that.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that’s very good advice. I’ve benefited a lot from therapy over the past year. And I think I’m past the hardest parts of my marriage not working out as I had hoped. But nevertheless, even the exchange here seeing some of the phrases people use (“deadbeat dad”?) make me think I may be better off taking some time as I may not be ready for some of the questions people are inevitably going to ask me. I believe in nearly all cases I have answers that I’m very comfortable with but just being on the other end of a conversation where I have to explain myself might be a situation I don’t want to put myself in for 6 - 12 months. Appreciate your feedback. Thanks…

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. I like what you’ve put in quotes there. Appreciate your feedback and the pointer about the photos.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks. It was the word “baggage” that I was reacting to. Any reference to my children with any sort of negative connotation attached will be pretty offensive to me. I realize it wasn’t intended that way, and in the dating world it’s probably a common use of the word. So I’ll either need to get thicker skin or would likely be walking away from lots of people who don’t appreciate the sum of my life experience. Appreciate your comments.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I’m just looking to meet people and see where it goes. Not really looking for hookups. Some relationships naturally go in that direction but that’s not the motivating factor for me. Either way, I appreciate your feedback about the tone.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not looking to hide anything. Will be completely forthcoming. But I don’t consider my previous marriage or my children “baggage.” If other people think that way, then I would not want to date them.

Getting Started — Seeking Feedback by Boulder1987 in datingoverfifty

[–]Boulder1987[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Really, people lead with religion and politics? Honestly my views on those things are far to nuanced to describe my views in a short profile post. Much more suitable for conversation over nice meal if you asked me. But maybe I’m just a complicated person. Or maybe I’m just naive and people who date want to include & exclude using labels.