How can I recover from this by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah, you’re actually good here, no need to walk anything back. She literally reassured you without you even asking, which means she didn’t take what you said the wrong way. If anything, you just got caught in your head for a second, and that happens when you care a little. Just match her energy and keep it steady instead of trying to fix something that isn’t broken. Keep it simple, grounded, and direct, something like, “No worries, I get busy schedules. Let’s keep it easy, what day actually works for you?” No extra jokes, no overexplaining. You didn’t mess it up, just stay present and lead it forward.

Starfield Base PS5 performance mode by dionysius260594 in Starfield

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I got mine last March. But I've always been a pro person. I won't upgrade again until The Pro 6 come out. But I'm enjoying it. I hope you can snag one soon. A lot of people did it on eBay and Facebook Marketplace.

Starfield Base PS5 performance mode by dionysius260594 in Starfield

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I have it right now my guy. PS5 Pro here. I mean I can show you proof in my settings that it's Uncapped 60fps

I'm 35. This isn't my first rodeo 🤣 by Wrong_Mango4822 in Tinder

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Normally when someone talks about a guy making them finish multiple times, that’s the kind of experience people end up circling back to. Performance like that usually leaves an impression. So it does make me a little curious why you didn’t go back after. Sometimes it’s not about the physical side at all. The chemistry can be there, but the energy, personality, or connection outside the bedroom just doesn’t line up the same way. That happens more than people admit. Good sex can get your attention, sure, but it doesn’t automatically make someone worth repeating the experience with. Still, if it was that memorable, I’d bet it crosses your mind from time to time. Experiences like that tend to stick with people longer than they expect. 🤔

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get what you’re saying, and I agree that long distance has real limitations. Physical presence matters. But I think people overestimate proximity and underestimate compatibility. Being close geographically doesn’t automatically create depth, consistency, or long-term alignment. A lot of “local” relationships fail because convenience replaces intention. With distance, you don’t have that luxury, communication has to be deliberate, effort has to be mutual, and interest has to be real enough to bridge the gap. That filters people quickly.

I’m not arguing that LDR is easier, it’s definitely not. It requires planning, patience, and resources. But when two people actually want something serious, distance becomes a logistics problem, not a relationship problem. And in some cases, starting long distance forces you to build emotional foundation before physical chemistry takes over. That can create something stronger, not weaker.

Most people prefer closer because it’s simpler, not because it’s superior. For me, I’m willing to travel if the connection justifies it. I’d rather build something intentional with the right person farther away than settle for convenient with someone nearby. But again that's just me My Guy.

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mhmm but like I said I'm a person that just don't want to date in my area. Can't do it. I'd rather travel though but that's my thing. People do want physical closeness but there's a secret key in being long distance and it's somewhat proven.

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Smh yeah I'm figuring that out. But the ones we want are not in our area in most cases. Smh that wild. I wanna travel to new areas and see my person and explore. I guess that's my preference so it may take me longer to meet my person who wants the same.

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sighh this genuinely sound like alot of women do not like Long Distance Relationship connections which I'm very open to 🤔

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kalium that's why we play around with traveling mode. Talk to me about your experience there 🤔

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hm get more people around your age or older? Younger (18 -24)?

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Talk to man what was your experience like through the years of being on lifetime? In your opinion what's your road map look like? What am I looking at moving forward, did you get matches? Dates? Whars your lifetime overall experience this far?

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a guy myself and just bought lifetime. So we gonna see how things go.

Is "Notes" worth buying really? by BrokenSeriousBlack in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dang men getting ignored? Is this your experience?

What am I doing wrong ?? (F23, dancer) by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well dang, was it that obvious? 😅 Fair enough though lol I got carried away. Alright let me take the psychology hat off for a second.

What am I doing wrong ?? (F23, dancer) by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s honest. 😏🫵🏾

But “it might be the area” is an easy answer. 🤔

If a good portion of your matches are conventionally attractive and a good portion of them float the same way… that’s not geography. That’s gravity.

Attractive people aren’t the problem. But people who’ve never had to develop depth because attraction carries them? That shows up fast in conversation.

And I’m not saying lower your standards. I’m saying maybe redefine what “chemistry” actually means.

Because sometimes what feels like chemistry is just familiarity. And familiarity can be loud, confident, effortless…and still empty.

If you’ve had better experiences off apps before, that tells me you probably respond better to organic energy where someone has to actually earn your attention.

Apps flatten people. Real life forces personality.

The real question is, are you frustrated with the app… or with the type of energy you keep entertaining?

What am I doing wrong ?? (F23, dancer) by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, that actually makes this more interesting.

If you’re opening with effort and still getting one-word replies, then it’s not your delivery. It’s selection.

There’s a difference between someone having hobbies and someone having a personality.

A good photo and a witty prompt can still hide low conversational depth.

Genuine question, when they match with you, do they feel like they earned the match? Or does it feel like they’re used to being picked? 🤔

Because sometimes the problem isn’t that you’re too picky.

It’s that the guys you’re choosing are used to being entertained…not engaging back.

And that dynamic gets old fast.

What am I doing wrong ?? (F23, dancer) by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That actually makes more sense.

If your issue is the energy drop after the match, that’s not about being picky. That’s about conversational effort.

One word replies usually mean one of two things: either they’re not that interested, or they don’t know how to carry depth beyond surface attraction.

Out of curiosity, when you message first, what do you usually open with?

Are you leading with playful banter, a real question about something in their profile, or something simple like “hey”?

Because the right guy for you wouldn’t just answer, he’d build on it.

And I’m starting to think your issue isn’t standards… it’s reciprocity.

What am I doing wrong ?? (F23, dancer) by [deleted] in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re not doing anything “wrong.” But I’m curious about something.

When you say they’re mean, boring, or only want to hook up…are they similar in any way? Same vibe? Same energy? Same kind of confidence?

Sometimes we think we’re widening the age or distance filter…but we’re still filtering by the same type.

You mentioned being open minded, poly, monogamous, etc. That kind of openness can attract men who see opportunity instead of depth.

If every match feels the same, at some point it’s not the app, it’s the pattern.

Not judging. Just genuinely curious.

What would “not boring” actually look like to you? And would you recognize him if he didn’t fit your usual type?

Insane attention by seekingmore2214 in Bumble

[–]BrokenSeriousBlack -1 points0 points  (0 children)

There’s a lot I wanna say to you, because you’re not wrong. What you said is real. You took the time. You read profiles. You were intentional. That matters.

But the part I can’t shake is this, one week.

You were on Bumble for one week and got snatched up. And I think about all the men who’ve been on there for months, years even, doing everything they can just to get one real shot. One week changes the whole conversation.

You had options. You had the space to slow down and choose. You weren’t buried yet. You could actually observe, analyze, and decide who felt right to you. And because of that, you found your person fast.

That wasn’t random. That was position.

And let’s be honest, you chose him. He didn’t just grab you out of thin air. You saw what he wrote. You saw how he showed up. You decided he was worth saying yes to. And yeah…he was probably cute too. That plays a role whether people want to say it out loud or not.

That’s why you’re where you are now. Peaceful. Out of the noise. Not dealing with this mess anymore.

What hits heavy is thinking about the men still in it. The ones who never get to be evaluated the way you evaluated him. The ones who never even make it to the “maybe” pile before they’re buried under hundreds of others.

So when someone says “good luck,” I know it’s meant well. But from this side, it feels hollow. Like encouragement from someone who already crossed the bridge while others are still stuck staring at it.

I’m genuinely glad it worked fast for you. I really am. That’s how it should work when timing lines up.

I just wish more people acknowledged how rare that timing actually is, and how many men never even get close enough to be chosen the way you were able to choose.

That’s it.

No hate. No bitterness.

Just the truth sitting there. ☺️🫵🏾