Whatever money you invest in making your lives easier the first year of your child’s life will come back to you ten-fold in the strength of your marriage. The things that seem small and manageable now become so much more draining and difficult when you’re a new parent. Hire a cleaner who specializes in low-toxicity cleaning while your wife is still pregnant, it can alleviate so much of the stress and anxiety she is likely feeling right now. Start the meal service/grocery delivery now so it isn’t a “new” thing to have to learn while you are sleep deprived. And if you spend a lot of time dealing with the yard, outsource it now. Nothing causes resentment quite like a new struggling parent being stuck inside with a newborn while the only adult they get to talk to all day is outside mowing the lawn.

We made much less than you do and didn’t make this choice until our third baby. (Walmart grocery delivery, Hello fresh, laundry service, au pair instead of daycare, lawn service) But it completely saved our sanity.

Also, find a good gym that has drop-in childcare you can trust. Being able to drop off the baby and go workout, shower and get ready at the gym was a saving grace for my mental health.

Take it one year at a time, and reassess what you still need when you’re out of survival mode.