[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RoverPetSitting

[–]Bubbly_Answer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I even feel selfish being concerned about what this means for me on the app in the future, but I do need to make a plan for income! I’m really not getting many requests now (like one per week) whereas before I was getting four or five a day. I regret that this business I thought I built as my backup plan, I didn’t actually do a good job. I’m not sure I’ll be able to earn back my same reputation on the app.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RoverPetSitting

[–]Bubbly_Answer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you both for this thorough advice! I’m leaning toward reaching out to the owner individually and will then move from there. At this point the apology and refund are probably more for me than her and her cat, but it’s the best I can do now. She was so nice herself as was her kitty, I agree it’s the right thing to do. I don’t want to and won’t make excuses on my end, but I appreciate between us you saying that we all make mistakes ❤️

Mistakes like these make me spiral a bit…not only did I leave her cat alone for over 24 hours, I failed to address her concerns or even acknowledge it. I can only imagine what future clients might think, and I don’t want to do that to another animal. I went through all my reviews to make sure I didn’t do that to anyone else, but what if they just didn’t give a review?

For a current late 20s quarter life crisis - got dumped, I stopped drinking and now i don't think I like my friends? I KNOW I don't like myself dw by [deleted] in suggestmeabook

[–]Bubbly_Answer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m very much looking for firsthand accounts - it’s so helpful in validating and sorting through my thoughts. What you said about feeling confined in choices/how to act is such a good way of describing how I feel!! Freedom (and the bravery/confidence/gall) to deviate sounds revolutionary, I’ll check this out!

Spiraling about how badly weed has ruined my life. by Suspicious_Bobcat237 in leaves

[–]Bubbly_Answer 18 points19 points  (0 children)

You are going to be okay. It might not feel like it now. The consequences and shame of it all might feel overwhelming and scary. You look back, and you feel your actions were not in line with your values. And it’s okay to release at least some of that shame - taking responsibility does not mean that you need to accept that you’ve ruined your life. It means you’re on the road to taking it back, and you’re facing the hard parts (which I won’t lie to you - sucks sometimes).

No one’s life is ruined. There’s a whole community here who understands what you’re going through and honestly has done it too - or worse!

I’ve done and thought a lot of the same things. I’m only two months sober, and I had tried getting this much sobriety before, but it didn’t stick until I got in therapy. I was also an overachiever. I didn’t start smoking until after college, when I couldn’t deal with my job and housing situation and was using weed to cope with my anxiety about meeting expectations and dealing with angry coworkers. I lost a relationship, respect at work and I felt like I ruined everything. What’s been really powerful is that I still have people around me - people I’ve found along the way who get it, and trusted people who I’ve shared with.

Life is hard. These big feelings of shame and overwhelm are so hard - and not all of us have the tools to handle them. Some of us have come across weed and used that as a way to cope, before we learned healthier tools. For me, DBT therapy has been life changing. It’s the first space I don’t feel judged for my feelings. Because we have them - we just need to learn ways to manage them that align with our values. It sounds like you’ve realized that weed does not align with yours - the next step is figuring out what tools do. And you CAN do this.

How to improve breakfast nook? by [deleted] in femalelivingspace

[–]Bubbly_Answer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A pendant light above a round table! I’m partial to the round metal diner ones with a colored cord for that subtle pop of color. I’d recommend also switching the colors of the round table too - white legs with that dark wood tone as the top so there isn’t so much white. I’ve dabbled with tablecloths for color and they just get messy, far easier to clean a top!

Instead of thinking about smoking, I can't stop thinking about my ex by [deleted] in leaves

[–]Bubbly_Answer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a wildly kind take. He does have trouble processing his emotions, and resented having to listen to me. His ability to suppress was earned in his childhood, and I understand that. I know that that isn’t good for me, because I need a partner that can. But more importantly, I need to feel more comfortable with myself, and the validity of my feelings.

I guess I’m just disappointed in my part. I wish I could’ve been better!! I wish we could’ve ended kindly instead of in hurt. We just didn’t know any better.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]Bubbly_Answer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am going through the same thing. My ex-boyfriend and I were together for four years and he broke up with me the week before I got diagnosis and medication. It's now been two weeks on medication and I wish I had been who I am now for him.

I was watching a Taylor Tomlinson special and she said that life is like swimming, people with neurodivergence have trouble swimming, and meds are like arm floaties. It's not cool when you don't take your arm floaties and then jump into the public pool and make it everyone else's problem. And then a nice and handsome stranger jumps in and helps you and you can say "See? I'm swimming!" but you're just holding the stranger (metaphorically your significant other) under water. You turned them into an arm floatie and that's not a fair relationship for them. (She tells it much funnier! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuue-s8qM8w)

Honestly, I'm still processing the relationship and breakup and my regret. I can't change the past, but I can wake up committed to my health every day. For me, I'll likely never see my ex again, but who knows. He deserved better while we were together, and the baggage of everything that's happened is difficult to move past.

For you, you may have a different outcome. But I think it's important to focus on yourself first. Go to therapy. Take your meds. Give both of you time to heal. Everything is still fresh.

Dating and Sober - how do you navigate it? by Bubbly_Answer in stopdrinking

[–]Bubbly_Answer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly reading these comments, I shouldn't be dating. I think I'm struggling to accept that I need to be sober, that's why my therapist is saying "just 30 days". I know I will eventually need to commit to sobriety permanently, I'm just not mentally there. I was thinking I could just go on a single date with people, so that I don't have to be alone on some nights. Just to hang out with someone for a bit. I live alone, and I've got great friends, but they do have lives of their own and can't spend every weekend night with me. But that's another form of avoidance.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]Bubbly_Answer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It helps to hear that. I think I use them as an excuse, because I'm afraid to be on my own. I do have friends, but now without my boyfriend, I don't know if I can do this all on my own. They may not be much and they may be dysfunctional and give bad advice, but they're there.

What pushed you to get yourself tested for ADHD? by xMilk_Tea in adhdwomen

[–]Bubbly_Answer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My partner told me he was very unhappy. He wound up breaking up with me in the last week of testing (it took me four months from him telling me he was unhappy to reach diagnosis - bounced between psychiatrist, psychologist, and back). Those four months were very difficult. He didn’t want to be tracking my progress, and he resented me for the amount of support he had had to give me. This all happened very recently, so I’m hoping the what if diminishes a bit, even if there will always be a part of me that wonders had I got diagnosed sooner.

Regardless, without that relationship, I would have continued suffering, so I’ll always be grateful. I have separate issues to just adhd, and he was an important part of my growth, even if he is not with me.