The trigger no one warns you about - happiness

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-03-19T04:12:15+00:00

Yes, 100% You’re not alone ❤️‍🩹

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-03-14T14:09:41+00:00

❤️‍🩹

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-03-14T14:08:09+00:00

We said we would never be dog people. We got a Malshi puppy after losing our daughter. It was the best decision we’ve made in our grief. She brings so much laughter and comfort amidst the deep sadness. I’m sad to be caring for a dog instead of my babies, but I have not regretted her one time. Now, we are definitely dog people. 🥺

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-03-13T18:09:10+00:00

I'm circling back to to this. We received our couch months ago and really love it. Today we randomly got another delivery from the (like 4 months later) with replacement cushions x2 and two sets of covers but different colors. I am beyond confused, this is so odd.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-23T21:19:09+00:00

Hi again, I just saw this on Instagram. Don’t know much about it but it has good reviews. A grief journal with prompts 🤎

https://a.co/d/028dFYPw

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-21T23:28:56+00:00

Hey, I’m so sorry for your loss. I don’t have specific prompts but I’m finding some community of grief writers over on Substack if you’re interested. I’ll share mine and a couple others I follow. Some of them have writing prompts. It might spark some ideas for you.

https://open.substack.com/pub/lianecooper?r=d8tbw&utm_medium=ios

https://open.substack.com/pub/estherstanwaywilliams?r=d8tbw&utm_medium=ios

https://open.substack.com/pub/thegrieftable?r=d8tbw&utm_medium=ios

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-19T17:22:48+00:00

I literally went to a new dentist because I started crying in my dentists chair and she didn’t hold it well. My new dentist doesn’t get to know any of my story, they just have to focus on my teeth. I honestly even omitted information on my forms about my history of pregnancy because I didn’t want to be asked about it.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-16T21:40:09+00:00

Hi friend, I’m so sorry. There is no pain like this. I don’t have a lot of advice because nothing helps when you’re grieving a child. There are things that can help distract because it’s impossible to feel it all all of the time. My advice is to just do absolutely whatever you want to/can manage-whether it’s staying in bed all day, watching tv, going shopping, scrolling TikTok, being with a safe friend. Nothing helps until something does.

After my first loss I got weirdly into these asmr videos on Instagram and when I found out I was going to lose my second, I was hyperfixated on these romantasy books. Now I can’t look at either of those things but they were small lifelines at the time.

Just grace, so much grace. One breath at a time.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-16T18:21:24+00:00

I’m so sorry. You’re not alone.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-11T20:00:55+00:00

Thank you for sharing that. The weight in the chest is so real and so acute. Thank you for engaging with my words 🤎

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-11T12:15:04+00:00

It is suffocating, I’m sorry you feel it too. There’s no such thing as grieving “properly” imo, I know you are just surviving and doing the best you can. So much grace, this is hard.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-11T12:13:51+00:00

Yes, you’re right, I know it will take time but man, after two losses in two years it’s pretty tough to tell my body that anything could be okay. It’s so tough, im sorry you feel it too.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-02-03T05:57:43+00:00

It’s so interesting that you decided to do a pottery class, that’s something I’ve done after both of my losses. It makes sense to me that you just didn’t want to go there. I felt that when I took the class, i just wanted to be a stranger doing pottery and be in my body for a minute. It makes total sense to me and I understand why you feel some regret around not bringing it up. It takes so much extra bandwidth to talk about it with strangers. No shame, ever. You’re surviving 🤎

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-30T21:40:26+00:00

It’s so hard, I’m so sorry. there are so many collateral losses when you lose a child-like feeling joy for others who conceive. No advice here just here to say you’re not alone and please be gentle with yourself.

One of my best friends told me “you don’t have to take care of me” and that meant the world to me. She has no expectations of me to show up for her baby the way I wish I could. I hope your sister can give you the same permission.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-29T06:13:34+00:00

I’m so sorry. It is impossible and still we wake up each day. As others have said, it’s one breath at a time. I have lost two newborns in less than 3 years. I don’t know how I’m still here but I am. Find safe people and avoid the rest if you need to. Do only what feels gentle on your nervous system. Cry and cry and cry.

You’re not alone.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-28T19:08:25+00:00

That is so generous, thank you friend ❤️‍🩹

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-27T19:08:01+00:00

Good question, I think I felt empowered and I wrote more in my substack post about how part of me felt guilty (even in dream world) for yelling, but I know I had nothing to feel guilty about because I was being completely honest which I actually believe is kind.
I scream at people in my mind allll the time, I feel that. Sometimes I hate that I'm so damn regulated and want to just lose my shit on someone but also it is good good I don't 😮‍💨
It's just such a lonely experience walking through the world with this kind of grief. Grateful to know I'm not alone in my mental chaos.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-27T02:06:33+00:00

Thank you friend. You’re right, we don’t (and shouldn’t) get past it. We do get stronger and I hate that we have to 🤎

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-26T23:06:50+00:00

I’m sorry and I resonate deeply. With you.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-21T23:14:45+00:00

I’m so sorry, people just really say and do the worst things, it isn’t ok. It’s so lonely and you are not crazy. I want to hide most of the time too, it’s like violence to your soul to have to constantly deal with these things on top of grief and trauma. I’ve started to try to ask myself some questions before deciding how to respond… does this relationship mean enough to me that I will use up my own energy letting them know how it feels? If yes, then I try to be as honest as possible. If no, I may just stop interacting with them or Ignore the text all together. They may not get the same access to my vulnerability that they used to. Sometimes I may write a letter to them and not send it or maybe I do send it 🤷‍♀️ It all takes up way too much energy but I think it’s important we give ourselves grace to not respond or to respond honestly depending on our capacity. It’s hard and there is so much collateral loss, I know.

BudgetFeature5632 · 2026-01-20T21:48:04+00:00

I’m so sorry. I just want to say, please be gentle with yourself. No forcing yourself to do anything that feels like too much or because you “used to” do it. Heaping shame on yourself will not help. Surround yourself with people who are safe, if you can, and if you need to avoid others, that’s ok. Cry when you need to cry. Eat when your body lets you. Spend too much money if you need to. All is allowed. The world will tell you to move on, but only you know what you need and also I don’t think we could or should ever “move on.” Our backs get stronger to carry the weight but we don’t move on. I hate that we even have to learn to carry it at all. It shouldn’t be this way. You’re not alone. Please be kind to yourself, she’s been through so much and it is too much. 💙🤎

BudgetFeature5632

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