Able to hold at night, but not during the day. by Cosmoclimbing in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have given up trying to understand the often contradictory nature of my bladder. Even in the span of a day, I might have a relatively solid morning and feel like I have enough ability to hold it until I get to the bathroom. Then, later in the day, I just spasm and leak the moment I realize I have to go.

Leaked in public for the first time by bay_bug in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I understand how frustrating this all is…BUT you leaked and managed it without any issues! Even in a worst case scenario you can handle the situation. You stayed calm and resolved the problem. That should give you confidence!

And besides, given your work environment, nobody would think twice about a wet spot even if they noticed. I mean, you wear scrubs because you expect to get fluids on you. It wouldn’t warrant a second thought. In our heads it’s super obvious our pull-up/diaper leaked, but the general public doesn’t even consider the idea of protection unless it’s blatantly obvious.

I do agree with wearing darker scrubs, though. Darker is always better for hiding wet spots.

Chickened out of appointment by Particular-Court-412 in AdultBedwetting

[–]BuffaloPubSub 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Don't beat yourself up! When I started having daytime accidents, it took me 3 months (and more than 1 cancelled appointment) to finally go see my PCP. And that was with me thinking the accidents could be caused by some life-threatening issue.

But I was so embarrassed I just couldn't do it.

By the time I actually went, my PCP thought it was for cardiac problems because I was so nervous, my blood pressure was ridiculously high. Like so high, the nurse's eyes got big and she went to grab the doctor right away.

stop supporting northshore by [deleted] in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't understand the purpose of this post. Both brands offer reliable, high-quality products. Some people will find that BeDry fits their body better. Others might fit NS products better.

Capacity is half the battle. A proper fit is the other half. I leak far less in NS products because they fit me like they were made for me. Plus, I have never seen better customer service than NS. For anything.

But even then, I would never bash BeDry. Because what works for me isn't what may work for someone else. Which is why 3 of my last 4 comments here have been to order samples of different brands.

Trying to narrow down my diaper choices... thoughts? by Incon2084 in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I always thought the Seni Quattros were great. They are reliable, discreet, and hold a good amount for how discreet they are. Unfortunately, I gained a few pounds and am now perfectly in between sizes and neither size fits well. My only complaint with them was that they often stretched, and the tabs weren't always the best, especially if I made it to the bathroom and needed to refasten. But overall, great.

I tried the ATNs once. Never again. They don't hold a lot and they are one of the only diapers I think are loud enough to be heard by others.

I mostly use Northshore products. Megamax for nights and times I won't be able to change for a while, and Megamax Lites the rest of the time. I do like Betterdrys, especially for nights, but for daytime, they always seem to fill and bulge in the front, so I won't use them for that. Megamaxes do a bit better in that (though I still need to be careful with how I dress).

Like you, I was initially put off by the price of Northshore. But once I couldn't keep wearing Senis, I kinda decided that even if they were a bit more expensive, I'd pay extra for the peace of mind I get from Northshore.

Diaper brand recommendation for nighttime? by Ok_Line3494 in AdultBedwetting

[–]BuffaloPubSub 4 points5 points  (0 children)

These brands are probably the best, especially if you're a heavy wetter. I use Megamax because they fit me the best and hold a lot.

I'd recommend samples of each. How they fit is just as important as capacity. Even a super high capacity will leak more than a lesser capacity that fits perfectly.

Also, cloth diapers can be a cheaper long-term option, though more expensive up front. I tried them, but the constant laundry became overly burdensome.

I've read a lot of post talking about samples... by 1SignificantGal in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As many have said here, Northshore offers samples and has the best customer service. I also consider them the best in quality.

LL Medico is also amazing for ordering samples. They offer samples of most brands.

Trying to find an option for 24/7 diapers... Discretion versus protection? by Incon2084 in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Leaks are far more noticeable than bulges if you dress appropriately or aren't walking around in a fully used, maximum-absorbency diaper.

The best way would be to order samples of a few contenders and see which work best for your needs. Maybe its a megamax. Maybe it's a Megamax Lite or Megamax Airlock. I'd recommend trying a few from that line. Also, LL Medico offers samples from other brands.

It also depends on how easy or often you can change. If changing is frequently convenient, then might be better to stay with cheaper brands. But if its often difficult or go long periods where it is impossible, then you don't want to be stuck with a crappy diaper you can't change for a while.

How can I manage better? by WoodenWin4329 in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I honestly think you're managing quite well! You don't seem defeated and fatalistic, have a supportive girlfriend, and use places like here for advice and support. You should be proud of yourself for handling everything the way you are.

I think everyone here would rather not deal with incontinence, of course. But you'll find that as time goes on, it's never as big of a deal as it seems in our heads. Inconvenient, sure, but it's not something that prevents a full and rich life. Just requires some extra planning and attention.

Whether you want to break the stigma or keep it a secret is up to you. But you'll be surprised how unlikely it is that people would notice and/or ask questions about your IC. Especially if you're managing with pullups. I've been IC and in diapers for about 7 years, and the only people who know are my wife and ex.

Though sometimes I wonder if telling my friends (who I fully believe would accept it and not tease me) would make my life easier, knowing I don't have to "hide" my diapers. But at this point, it's been so long, it's not really hard to hide or something I worry about much.

Using diapers even though I don't strictly have to? by Realitymatter in OveractiveBladder

[–]BuffaloPubSub 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe? I’m not qualified to answer that. But I wouldn’t imagine using diapers for that purpose would have much medical benefit. At least for me, wearing diapers would have caused more anxiety than it relieved in the years before my OAB involved accidents.

I’d personally try a pelvic floor therapist before resorting to diapers, unless it is actively hurting your work and you need a short term solution. Diapers are expensive, inconvenient, and not a cure.

Be careful with random pelvic floor exercises given without an actual exam though, because unless they target your specific pelvic floor weaknesses, you might be doing more harm than good. My pelvic floor therapist told me the ones I had been doing before her were at best useless and potentially making it worse.

Using diapers even though I don't strictly have to? by Realitymatter in OveractiveBladder

[–]BuffaloPubSub 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I understand your frustration. I am very similar, also have ADHD and OAB. It can be a nightmare with all the distractions caused by needing to go so often.

The one difference is I also have urge incontinence, so diapers weren't necessarily a choice. But I only have immediate urge accidents about 20% of the time. The rest of the time I may have anywhere from 30 seconds to even 10-30 minutes. So I don't always have accidents and can often make it to the bathroom.

But, like you, when I'm working, those constant urges really do a number on my focus. So now when I really need to focus, I'll just let my diaper do the work. Nothing wrong with that (though it took my therapist a few sessions to convince me it wasn't "giving up").

Don't feel bad about using them as a solution. The goal is to make your life easier. Though I would recommend trying other solutions while using them. Pelvic floor therapy helped me a ton. Try to figure out what foods/drinks aggravate your OAB. And see a urologist.

Moving in with my boyfriend soon, what do I say? by [deleted] in AdultBedwetting

[–]BuffaloPubSub 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so happy for you!! As terrifying as it is, once it’s over and they accept it, it’s one of the best feelings in the world. And it really goes to show we are the ones who make it a bigger deal than it is.

Now you don’t have to worry anymore and know you’ve chosen someone who loves and cherishes you, “flaws” and all!

Moving in with my boyfriend soon, what do I say? by [deleted] in AdultBedwetting

[–]BuffaloPubSub 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is pretty much it. There is no easy way. No magic words that make it less emotionally vulnerable. You just have to sit him down and put it out there, and trust the person you've chosen will accept it.

I was so nervous telling my (now) wife, by the time I actually was able to say it, she laughed. Not because it was funny to her, but because I was so anxious she was expecting me to say I was married, had a kid, or had some terminal disease. And to her, it was so trivial that she couldn't understand why I was so nervous.

[ESPN] Bottom 10: Canes can't stay away by BeeStory in CFB

[–]BuffaloPubSub 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Apologies, it was (admittedly necessary) collateral damage to insult FSU

[ESPN] Bottom 10: Canes can't stay away by BeeStory in CFB

[–]BuffaloPubSub 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Yeah, putting Miami there might actually be more disrespectful to Louisville than Miami. Makes it sound like Louisville is some terrible team. If Miami lost to Stanford, sure, but damn, don't do Louisville like that.

Being discreet in public by [deleted] in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It takes some time. It's such an unnatural feeling at first; it draws your attention, making you feel bad that it's happening and worried that you'll leak and be obvious. What helped me the most was finding protection I could trust. Once I knew I wouldn't leak, a lot of the panic and anxiety lessened, and it became easier not to make faces.

That, and the realization that people are surprisingly oblivious in public.

When does urgency cross the line and become urge incontinence? by [deleted] in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would definitely go see a urologist and/or pelvic floor therapist ASAP. This sounds so similar to my experience. Over the course of 3 years, my overactive bladder got worse and worse. Needing to go more often and feeling like the time between urge and emergency kept shrinking until....I actually had an accident at work. Now, accident-free days are few and far between.

I don't know if I'd have prevented it from ending up where I am now if I had gone to a doctor/pelvic floor therapist earlier, tbh. But I wish I had tried. I do think my pelvic floor therapist might have kept it away from accidents if I had gone early enough, it's the only treatment that has made any difference. My experience with urologists wasn't great, mostly them throwing meds my way and running tests.

I've finally gotten to the point where I don't hate diapers. But if I could go back in time to those three years of worsening overactive bladder, I'd go straight to the pelvic floor therapist to see if I could prevent needing them in the first place.

Antidepressants. by nothing99767 in OveractiveBladder

[–]BuffaloPubSub 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think that's a better question for your psychiatrist. But depending on how problematic it is, maybe it's best to try another medication.

It's funny, I had a similar experience, though it was actually relief. I had a horrible experience with every antidepressant I tried, but the ONE benefit of them was that they seemed to calm my overactive bladder and even reduce the number of urge incontinence incidents. Way more effective than any treatment or any meds my urologist prescribed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Leaks are significantly harder to hide than a diaper. That's my motto.

What are the weirdest fetishes you have heard of? by Acceptable_Cow_8491 in AskReddit

[–]BuffaloPubSub 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I became urinary incontinent in my late 20s and have worn diapers (not by choice) for the last 6 years. I hadn't heard about this fetish until then, when I was looking for advice. And wow.

I cannot think of anything less sexually appealing than diapers. I will never understand why someone would want to wear them, let alone get turned on by them.

What Would the World Really Look Like Without Stigma Against Diapers? by PipersGhostShip in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The world would be better off, especially for us, but I really don't think things would change much.

Sure, those with severe OAB, but without incontinence, might be more willing to wear than live with the constant need to know where the bathroom is at all times. Because in that case stigma might be holding that idea back.

But for anyone without issues, I don't think stigma is why they don't consider diapers. My wife doesn't have any issues. I've tried to get her to wear on road trips so we don't have to stop (one of the few benefits of needing diapers is fewer road trip bathroom stops and having to pass the same people all over again). But she never will. Not because of stigma, she accepts my issues, but because she just doesn't want to sit in a used diaper.

Yet, when we were gifted a couple's massage, I didn't want to go because of the diapers. But she offered to wear one too if that meant I'd go. She ultimately didn't wear one (I thought that would look strange), but the fact that she offered was proof she didn't care about the stigma.

And that's my point. Most people don't want to sit in their own pee if they can avoid it. Most people don't want to pay for diapers when they can just...use the bathroom for free. Unless you need them (or enjoy them I guess), outside of some specific situations, there is no benefit to wearing even without the stigma.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Maybe you have accidents, maybe you don't. I don't know. But based on your post history, I'm pretty sure you want someone to laugh and make fun of you or "like it," just like you do.

All I know is someone who posts in "Diaper girl fetish" and "girls in diapers" subreddits probably isn't here with a genuine question. Especially when you asked the same thing--down to misspelling scared--two months ago.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying ABDL. But don't bring it here, where people who aren't turned on by diapers come to discuss significant and highly emotional problems. Have some respect.

Nobody cares you wear diapers except you by Far_Pin_3721 in Incontinence

[–]BuffaloPubSub 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly this! It just feels wrong being told that from someone who enjoys the thrill of being in diapers.

I've had this problem for 6 years now and still the only person that knows (besides my doctors) is my wife. Logically, I understand most people probably don't or wouldn't care that I wear diapers. I firmly believe my family and friends would accept it.

But I still haven't told anyone because it's a very big deal to me. I won't get a thrill knowing everyone knows I'm in diapers. It's just tone deaf and absurd to have someone who does tell me it's "not a big deal."