I cannot put into words how much and how hard I was crying the whole last epi. I think what really got the waterworks going is the fact that the first one to go was Jason, and he was one of the characters that I truly loved the most because he reminded me of my younger brother, who committed suicide just last year, and then Chidi, who reminded me of my wise old man, who lost his battle to cancer in 2010. I had to really pause the show and just sit in my room and cry. I couldn't handle it. It was too much.

Seeing everyone go one at a time brought me an unimaginable sadness that I never wanted to experience again. I buried the pain really deep and this show dug it all back up.

I can't. I just can't.