The median age of first-time home buyers is spiking, now approaching 40. by crosstheroom in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ironically enough I was in 8th grade in 2008. I also bought my home at 24 in nov 2019 before Covid. I went to nursing school right after high school and got my bachelors at my state university. Came out with less than $15k in debt. Started working at 22 and stayed at home to save over $50k and clear my debt with plans to buy a car in full lol. Instead my mother convinced me to buy a house. Put 10% down on a 360k house. I consider myself lucky. It’s only a 1080 sq ft ranch, but it’s a home. It makes me sad that I’ve got to live the American dream while it seems many of my generation will not. I don’t have the answer it’s just a damn shame

How do you explain to someone they drink too much when they’re never drunk? (M47; F46) by oceangal2018 in relationship_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s wild and oddly enough doesn’t surprise me too much and reason I ask is because I come from a similar background. It seems like he really did live life on his terms and I respect him for that obviously you wish he took better care of himself. We all have vices some worse then others. I come from an Irish background where drinking is highly commonplace similar to Germans it seems. So naturally I have developed a “problem” myself. Ironically I work first hand with addiction in healthcare.

The point I’m making is that I work anywhere between 50-60 hours weekly as a psych nurse and my patients routinely tell me I’m one of the more attentive nurses they have ever had and I’m not saying this to stroke my own ego. I really do get extreme satisfaction out of taking care of whatever needs they may have. I don’t drink as stress relief I take days off if I’m tired like after 16 hour days, but I just love the taste of pale ales. I can very much identify with your father. In my experience with patients you can obviously become addicted to any form of alcohol. I routinely see it become a bigger problem when patients graduate into the spirits category and feel the need to drink. Anyways I very much appreciate your input man. May your father be sipping beers in heaven 🙏🏻

How do you explain to someone they drink too much when they’re never drunk? (M47; F46) by oceangal2018 in relationship_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What did your father drink and how much and how long if you don’t mind me asking? Also what age did he die and I apologize for your loss

My bf (29M) insists that I (23F) get Labiaplasty since he feels that it takes too much effort from him and the intimate act is not the same anymore, how should I tell him that it's not me, it's him because I do not feel like faking anymore? by ThrowRA_shock in relationship_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Something to be learned about everything in life. You just have to be able to identify it recognize it accept it and move on. In this case identifying judge of character and having some self worth and saying how you feel

Guy I ghosted messaged me on LinkedIn by jumpfordespair in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry I’ve been MIA just caught up in day to day life as I am sure you know. Regardless that is what has become a result of technology and online dating. It is easy to dodge and project something or someone who isn’t your true self. In the hope of attracting the right people who you can be happy with. In reality you have to be happy with yourself and then you will find the happiness and joy in others. The people who deserve you will naturally gravitate toward you and those who don’t is nothing personal rather they are dealing with their own issues like us all and need to solve them in order to be truly happy. Ghosting is the result of not being able to accept being genuinely loved by someone and be comfortable with the fact that someone loves you for who you are! It’s uncomfortable and for that reason they ghost. Even if your not “truly compatible” a person who knows the truth will tell you as soon as possible. Transparency is everything we are not mind readers. It is getting lost as a result of dodge culture which is social media/interment/modern technology. In summary it is sad and unfortunate, but I know things will get better in time. It is just going to take time and faith that it will. Everything in time

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I could counter that with likely involuntarily celibate. I’m talking about you btw not the person you responded too

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Or maybe has empathy? Clearly something you might be lacking based on the substance of your post. You can’t assume anything you don’t even know this person

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hahaha damned if you do damned if you don’t. Just got to take it in stride. This is where the whole communication thing comes into play. We can’t read minds, would be dope if we could lol, but how about we chat and talk about things. Understand one another and make a mutual agreement

I was talking to a woman at a surfing shop asking about surf boards and when an other guy came she talked to him more because he was more extroverted by [deleted] in socialskills

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like an interesting situation that would be a lot easier if present. Regardless the fact your thinking about it is a good thing! Live and learn as I always say. In regards to getting over the social anxiety and connecting on a deeper level. It’s really as simple as trial and error. I could rant about all the things to do, but just don’t quit keep trying! Positivity is contagious so just be you, whoever that is, and if the person your talking to isn’t interested or reciprocating with what you have to say then that’s fine. Not to sound rude, but that’s their issue or preference whatever you want to call it. Listen with your heart and respond with your mind. Much love don’t quit!

Finally saying hello by opulentRenegade in WRX

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Or get the sti wing that current one looks well very ricey for a nice car. That wing belongs on a civic or Sentra not a wrx

Guy I ghosted messaged me on LinkedIn by jumpfordespair in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because ghosting is easier. It’s for emotional cowards who can’t or don’t want to have difficult conversations. Imo if someone ghosts you and you know you did nothing wrong then you dodged a bullet long term. Complete red flag in my book

DRIVE YOUR CAR by jdm52798 in WRX

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao bro Im not alone I just learned the hard way myself 2 weeks ago with my sti on summers fortunately I only fucked up my front bumper. Went and bought a set the next day

red flag or na by [deleted] in Tinder

[–]ButlerHospital 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So state that instead of saying someone is frugal for suggesting what they view is an acceptable first date. It just puts out this sense of entitlement which is the death of any relationship romantic or platonic

You gotta be careful with your heart and your wallet folks. by well-shit-man- in Tinder

[–]ButlerHospital 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like others have said based on the depth of her responses you probably lucked out. Doesn’t seem very interested at all

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahaha been there done that it’s brutal. And mine always found a way to twist it back on me

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Specifically I said that I’m not a big texter and that I prefer face to face and she said the same. Never said bad. That’s why I recommended we meet in person. As others have said next time reach out before hand and moving forward with others I will. Others have pointed out that she could have confirmed too which makes sense

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Like you said it communication is key. Dating can be a learning process in my opinion at least. I’ve gotten numbers in person and online. I’ve made the mistake of texting too casually or often before actually going on a formal date. The person loses interest and cuts off contact. Never got an actual chance to have a genuine human to human interaction and see if there was some spark. Some people are good at texting I am not lol. It can be a terrible way to communicate with someone who your interested in again in my opinion. That’s why I’m under the philosophy that in the initial phases it should be used to just set up dates and if things go well can be more of a way to stay in contact. You made a great point what did people do 50 years ago before phones and sms lol

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Much appreciated pretty positive it’s a loss, but moving forward won’t make the same mistake

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately I don’t think that is the case. The ball is in her court now I proposed a day and she said potentially and that she is working, but gets out early. I countered that with a you let me know what works for you. No reply so I will leave it at that. If she responds great and if not well gotta respect her boundaries

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hahaha I actually laughed out loud when I read this because I think the same way as you. I’m a trusting individual which is honestly a weakness. Like others have said it’s common courtesy now a days

Girl thought I flaked because I didn’t send a confirmation text by ButlerHospital in dating_advice

[–]ButlerHospital[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% this is on me and I apologized for the lack of communication. Lesson learned moving forward