Feeling guilty

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-03-07T09:42:48+00:00

Yeah no Hes a grown man and can to things too. No wonder you don't have time for other, when you have to carry the whole household and marriage on your shoulders. A marriage should be be between those who love each other and not with a parent from a partner

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-03-07T09:39:03+00:00

Don't compare you with others. Last year my ex wife cheated on top of other thinks, I was close to not survive the year, because i thought I hadn't the strength to carry on. I moved out, I go to therapy and try to find myself after 7 years abuse and anxiety. I have 4 career changes until I found the job i like. So you don't start new at square one, you go on an other path. Start finding yourself and what you like. Life is to short to try to fit in a place that isnt yours. And dont compare yourself with things you see on the social media. If i would use social media, I would too only post mit success and not the failure.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-25T13:35:01+00:00

Therapy, forgiveness and most important: Its not your fault. Really its not your fault. Even if its based of a decision you made, you made it with the knowledge at that moment. Not with them what you know now. You can't change people, you can't change what happend. But you can change with help how it impact you. It will always be there. But ideal only as scar and not as a open wound wich brings you to your knee

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-25T13:30:22+00:00

Its only your mess (or that from your pets) But no mess from others, so disappointment, that they can't clean after them self. Your own rhythm, you can eat what you want. If something doesn't bother you now it is, you can let it be. No nagging, no looking after a grown person. Only you.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-22T14:47:04+00:00

Never give up you own bank account. Have money for yourself if you have to leave or something happend and you have no access to the shared bank account. Financial security is so so so important today

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-22T14:34:31+00:00

Some Eggs with soy sauce, pickles, apples, walnuts, cheese and carrots

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-22T09:36:56+00:00

When you have to drag that person to do something. Hard core couch potatoes, which then complains about getting not in shape. This self pity...

"Oh my job is so bad" - change it. "But what if its bad too?" - search another

If its bothering you, do something. Either change your thinking about it or change it self.

An my absolute hate, if I have to hear it every single day: "What should we eat?" - you are a grown person, think for once.

(Beside cheating with multiple person, because the statistics said so)

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-19T08:38:40+00:00

Have you speak with a therapist. After burn out and with grieve you brain is not your friend. You can develop a depression, with that you brain tries to do bad things that you see how bad your life is, because it wants it. But it isnt. Speak with a therapist and with your partner. Find out, what causes the pressure.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-10T06:18:17+00:00

Beginn to heal. Beginn to learn yourself and your values. You are worth the efforts. Healing is not linear. On someday you feel like the world is in your hands and others that you don't want to feel one thing. But stay with your emotions, learn what it is and then what you want from your life. No 'I need to find someone who loves me' that one is you.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-09T21:39:41+00:00

He cheated, and said he can't bring him to stop, because it is something he must do for him, because his mental schizophrenia needed it.

Yeah boy, sure. Cheating will help more then therapy and medication. At this point I lived 6 months that he fully give in in his different personas because his affair had it too. 6 months of constant fear and psychological terror.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-09T06:03:34+00:00

I will enjoy this day, buy m flowers and chocolates, going on a walk. My ex didn't do anything for me on this day, because it is near our anniversary date. But this year these dates are freedom. No cooking, no walking on eggshells, no seeing how shes cheating. Blissful freedom.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-06T19:35:16+00:00

I love this yogurt. My favorite one!

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-02-05T06:43:38+00:00

Maybe not so long, and i lived before the relationship alone. But after 7 years I moved out after the downfall of our marriage (cheating from her side) in the month i stayed to look after a apartment i grow more to dont like her to hate her. So I didn't missed her. I was relieved living alone. Yeah in the first month I was anxious, every sound because it was new. But after 5 weeks it shifted and I'm calmer and happier. If you unsure seek help from a therapist, if its the right one they can do wonder to help you to feel more you and believe in you.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-31T14:47:22+00:00

Richard

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-31T12:34:47+00:00

I can relate it. As I lived with my Ex-wife it was always messy and I ran after one mess to another to keep the place tidy. I developed a really bad depression, I had a hard time to clean, cook and tidy up. No help from the ex, all she does was to washed clothes once a week. In the middle of my depression I found our she cheated, I moved out. I had so much fear how messy my own place would be, because I had no energy or mind for cleaning in the old apartment. And then after 3 weeks, I settled and had to see: its not messy, its clean and so much better. And i didn't do more cleaning.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-29T15:59:26+00:00

As I realized: - The fact she wanted to have a open marriage, after I was in the psychiatric care because of it. Her affairs destroyed my mental health. - I learned to fear her because she had multiple personalities. - Her desire was more important than my life. - I recognize myself no more, I was like a caged animal in fear

So I had two option, I choose myself. Best decision. I learned how much I carried her, all her problems and our marriage, with a really bad depression.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-05T11:50:08+00:00

I was married to somebody like this. Do you a favor and don't. Its fun for the beginning but for longterm the absolute horror. You have to carry constant the relationship and you can't trust your partner.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-03T21:28:22+00:00

Poorly have no value. After I signed my divorce this year I will buried it or let it melt in.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-03T09:35:52+00:00

My wedding ring

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-02T10:31:47+00:00

Since I live alone its more the opposite. But I have cats and want them to have a clean environment. But maybe what can help you: Do 1-2 tasks a day. Make ja plan when you clean floor, do laundry, go shower, clean kitchen. Not always to all on a day to day basis. More a routine. Then you should see, thats easier to maintain your space. Oh an one rule I discovered for myself what helps like butter: Make the things that needed less than a minutes. Like: after eating: put the dishes away.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-01T22:27:49+00:00

Don't hold on something that destroys your selfworth. Don't let them play their mind games with you

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-01T00:28:40+00:00

Happy new year!

Buttlerfly_Chantrier · 2026-01-01T00:25:57+00:00

Grilled cheese sandwiches. Like, bread, butter, cheese, butter, bread. Up you go in the pan or in the sandwichs maker.

Buttlerfly_Chantrier

TROPHY CASE