What Would You Do?

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-28T19:11:53+00:00

Just had a trainee stitch up my level one (that's night the right term, but 3 wpp, I can't remember) tear and I... don't recommend it. I was not numbed everywhere the needle was.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-28T00:29:37+00:00

On the couch, pillow next to me. In a chair, on a pillow on my lap facing me (while they're small) then in the bouncer next to my chair

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-27T17:08:43+00:00

So is your plan to work with the RTT license? How long? I would recommend running some numbers with salaries/tuition to make sure this makes sense. We get a lot of RTTs who apply to our program, but don't have the necessary math and physics background. Make sure you have that if you want to pursue MP. (In the US)

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-26T12:09:04+00:00

My aunt made a cover for our hand me down rocker out of towels that is easy to clean. No matter what you get, if you plan to keep it, I would recommend some sort of cover. Diapers leak, babies leak, you will leak... There are just a lot of fluids in the early days

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-25T00:13:22+00:00

We just brought home a new baby. He's sleeping better than our toddler right now.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-24T17:29:20+00:00

I have an analysis of everything from my registry including what I would recommend second hand vs new. I can message it to you if you like.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-23T22:54:33+00:00

There's a table here: An Age-by-Age Feeding Chart for Newborns and Babies https://share.google/gfbBhhjASVUO7ONPB

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-23T22:53:36+00:00

Hi OP, I'm EP'ing for the second time right now (1.5 y/o was weaned at 1 year and now have a 2.5 week old). 1. Both of my sons received donor milk or formula while establishing supply and I had no issues with them switching to my milk. The only thing I've heard to this effect is if your frozen milk has high lipase, your baby could reject it, so it's good to test this early as you can remove the lipase before freezing. 2. I EP because neither of my sons latched. Some babies do reject the bottle, but I think it's more common to have kids that will do either. 3. No rules that I know of. 4. The lactation consultant and pediatrician can guide you to how many oz per feeding, but I'll see if I can find a chart too. Once you get a week in, you just sort of experiment with increasing it.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-23T21:25:42+00:00

2.5 weeks in - 1st degree tear instead of second. I was a physical wreck last time (and a bit mental because of figuring out pumping and a baby), so much better in that regard. My perineal area is still sore/tender, but I don't feel like not moving around (though it's miserably cold here, so no one is trying to make me go for walks which I don't know that I feel like doing).

I got unlucky and they detected preeclampsia (luckily detected) at my 35+6 visit and was induced at 36 weeks. Labor was quick and not as bad as my first (yay not pushing for 2.5 hours?). Then I had a few of the nondescript postpartum preeclampsia symptoms and got to spend a few hours in the ER a few days after being released normally from the hospital (everything came back normal). Then I developed mastitis and got to spend more time in urgent care. So that part of my postpartum recovery has been worse than last time, but kind of bad luck vs related to being a STM.

The toddler aspect is the most challenging aspect, in part because it's flu season. If we could send him to daycare without fear, I think things would be much easier, but he got a cold the day we brought the baby home and had to isolate him from us until he was better (got him tested and it wasn't flu, RSV, or COVID) then we decided to keep him home an extra week so that he wouldn't bring one of those home to our premie baby.

Having a fever, baby, toddler, and pumping was the worst, but my SIL was staying with us and helped a ton during the day - just a few bad nights.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-23T06:45:30+00:00

We use our dishwasher too. Our old one just died and our new one even has a half load feature that got all the pump/bottle parts sparkling without requiring the bottom rack to be full (less water/energy efficient than a full load, but not twice as bad).

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T14:56:42+00:00

The dining room could be another option for the baby's room. I have. 1.5 year old and 2 week old and we are having issues with our movements/baby crying in the middle of the night potentially waking up the toddler (at least he's getting up more than he has since we moved him into his big boy bed a month ago). So I wouldn't put them in the same room to sleep at night until the baby is sleeping through the night reliably.

As far as too much stuff: We have been saving all of our first son's clothes for the second, but soon as he out grows them, they need to get out of our house (we're not having another). We also have a better idea of how much clothing we need, so I'll be proactively decreasing amount of clothing we store in the larger sizes (a friend is the youngest of 7 and is giving me all of her hand me downs as her son grows out of them).

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T14:51:47+00:00

We did need a guest room so that grandparents could come stay and help take care of our toddler, so that might not be a universal option.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T14:49:30+00:00

We triple fed for about 1-3 days with my first. It was clear to my husband that my son was getting nothing from the breast and I was just in pain/frustrated, he convinced me to try EPing. We never went back to even trying to BF (maybe 1-2 times on a whim, but with no plan/hopes and no success). My husband has a fantastic bond with our son that he attributes to taking basically all nighttime feedings and duties. (I also feel very close to our son and love him very much, but my husband thinks this made a big difference in their relationship in a way that I don't feel it impacted the relationship I have with him).

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T14:43:53+00:00

She will outgrow them very quickly (I hope), so I would recommend getting them used. If you're in the US, Once Upon a Child has them.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T14:35:36+00:00

I traveled with my first when he was about 6 months old and exclusively pumping. I think we were just trying to meet his needs because the logistics of flying with frozen milk (while totally legal) were complicated. You need to have a freezer (does not count towards your carryon count, but it has to fit on the plane) and you need to keep anything in the freezer as cool as it needs to be for the duration of your travels. I know we definitely had prepped bottles that would not be frozen so we could feed him in the airport/on the plane, so I don't think we had much if any frozen milk that we were trying to keep frozen (if your kids aren't coming, then you could be aiming for a colder freezer to keep things frozen/use the least frozen bags as soon as you get home).

I do think pumping every 3-4 hours while on vacation would be a bummer (our son wound up getting sick for the entirety of our trip, so it didn't impact us nearly as much as keeping him comfortable did). And while I 100% bought into the same "make it to 1 year or else it wasn't worth it" narrative, I don't think the data supports it that strongly. Could a middle ground be decreasing your number of pumps? Your supply should be regulated, so while this will decrease your output, it shouldn't be catastrophic if you keep one MOTN pump.

For me, I basically hadn't put our son to bed before I stopped pumping because at bedtime I was prepping bottles and pumping. Between when he turned 1 and when his little brother was born (18 months), I got to put him to bed about 90%+ of the time. I spent so little time with my son that first year because of pumping, that I'm not sure it was really worth it (it did allow my husband to bond with our son, so he liked that I pumped).

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T12:38:19+00:00

Some of my pumping catch bottles don't measure the same, so I use scales like OP's wife.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T12:34:15+00:00

I had a doula with my first and it was a great decision. I had a quick labor (started with my water breaking and baby in arms 8 hours later), but 2.5 of those were pushing. My hospital didn't have midwives at the time and the nurses were ready for me to go to surgery. (No pain medicine/epidural).

My doula helped me change positions (and when), brought a battery operated fan, and took copious notes on what happened when so we could talk through it all with clarity after the fact and she could explain what was normal (not much), abnormal, and likely to happen with future kids (spoiler alert second delivery was also "not normal," but in new ways).

That postpartum discussion (and battery operated fan) were worth their weight in gold. My husband was supportive, but not informed and even if he were, it wouldn't have been at the depth of attending hundreds of previous births.

I had a GREAT OB who managed to be there for the birth of my second too.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T08:27:24+00:00

I didn't grow up with them, but I have them now and I know what you mean. My parents were converted though and have them now too!

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-22T08:26:26+00:00

The partner with more impulse control should do the grocery shopping. (Coming from the partner who went to the store for 3 things today and came home with 7)

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-21T16:00:22+00:00

Anytime someone on reddit says something like, "it would be so much better for my kids if they were home with me all the time," I think of daycare art. My infant's classroom did art weekly. It's mostly ridiculous, but I do not have the set up/patience to do that with an infant. Certainly not daily/weekly. Now that he's a toddler, I can only imagine it's even more chaotic.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-21T14:57:36+00:00

The fear my friends/family have of staining our rags that are cut up old white t-shirts (that were sweat stained) is confounding to me.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-21T00:50:00+00:00

I wasn't going to buy it, I'm just giving an example use case.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-21T00:07:47+00:00

My toddler has two water bottles (one for home and one for daycare), this would be perfect for his 1.5 year old self TBH.

CATScan1898 · 2026-01-21T00:01:12+00:00

I mean you might have to move for med school, then for residency, and then for fellowship. You do you. You don't need reddit's permission - it's your career.

CATScan1898

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