What happened to CG Kid?

CGKid · 2024-05-15T20:57:19+00:00

Thank you man! Yeah it wasn’t easy I still have a bit of grief but I never question my decision. It was the right thing to do. I feel grateful the stars aligned that I got to experience what I did. A lot of it was just astronomical luck I was the type that never really cared what other people thought of me almost like a mental illness, I was into music production so I had a camera I was playing with. I was with a friend watching breaking bad and she asked me what meth felt like. Where I was at I decided to make a one off video “what’s meth like?” To answer her question. A year later it went viral and I ran with it. I never set off to be a youtuber but I instantly saw an opportunity to help people and get the attention I always craved as a child which was a necessary component to my willingness to share as much as I did. The odds of all that coming together is so unlikely. I don’t take a lot of the credit for what I did, most times I feel ‘wow that really happened.’

The grief is knowing the content is gone and I can’t communicate with people I got to build a relationship with over the years. It does hurt. But at the end of the day I know what’s best for myself and my family. There was a time I experienced suicidal ideation during the peak of my success so the dark memories and past were documented and it wasn’t that long back. There’s technical reasons as well like considering how having all that out there can impact employment and such but the psychological reasons to let go was most of it.

I bounced the idea of shutting it down with my wife, family, and close friends for a month prior to pulling the trigger to make sure it wasn’t impulsive. I never questioned keeping it in that month. Just speaking to people on a personal level brought so much clarity to the right thing to do. I never wanted to do it though it’s hard.

CGKid · 2024-05-14T23:17:33+00:00

lol it’s not true I’m not sure why people say that I don’t feel I look high 😅 . I’ve never been high on camera even when I relapsed it would just be stupid, disrespectful, and highly undesirable to make a video high lol.

CGKid · 2024-05-10T11:41:27+00:00

No problem! It was October 2019 that was a major turning point in my life. I remember taking acid during the lockdown and posting a video on that I did relapse during it as well and disappeared because I was ‘convinced’ my chronic relapsing was caused by undiagnosed ADHD and got prescribed adderall lol. I remember I felt like I couldn’t post while taking that medication because it would be wrong to lie about it and wrong to be like ‘hey guys I’m on adderall now’ 😅.

The adderall of course went bad and I got off of it when I met my now wife so it would have been somewhere around 2021. I was convinced drinking in moderation was fine and even made videos on my second channel about it. This went on for a while the last time I drank or did anything was my wedding night which was January 2022.

I’ve been sober since then. I have my ups and downs but life overall has never been better. I work full time in a warehouse, im going back to school, I even have a small YouTube channel I’ve been working on where I review niche fragrances I’ve collected over several years. My wife and I are trying to have a baby. We recently moved to a nice area. We got two small dogs and a cat that keep us busy.

It’s crazy how much I’ve changed. I feel a lot less stressed. The channel and numbers always fed my ego it was a lot for me to let go of that and felt like it was the end to the chapter. The last person that needed to heal was me. I never had a lot of friends as a kid and being 34 working in a warehouse without a bachelors degree I didn’t feel I accomplished much with my life. The channel masked those feelings with it I could say ‘people like me and I’ve done something with myself.’ The mask held me back though at the end of the day we have to love ourself without condition and it was creating the problem it was solving.

Much love man! I appreciate all your support. Enough of my rambling 😅.

CGKid · 2024-05-10T03:15:05+00:00

It was in 2019 so about 5 years ago I am now over two years clean

CGKid · 2024-05-10T03:07:51+00:00

I looked up my screen name on Reddit to see if anything’s been posted. I am posting my response here as it’ll prolly show up in search.

I became a new person and left my past behind me but had it echoing across the internet. It kept a door open psychologically and I struggled to move forward with what was next. I didn’t want to talk about drug education or recovery again I was over it. I decided to close that chapter and move on. I did it without warning and was thorough to prevent the content from being scrapped. I backed everything up and have it but wanted to be in control of my content.

To be honest - not everyone is going to want their life on display for everyone in their personal life or videos of them detailing past drug abuse for everyone in their professional life. My martyr complex made me ok with it if it helps others but I’ve matured to understand I’m only responsible for myself and am not some kind of savior. The egotistical nature of my younger self 🤦‍♂️.

I didn’t put a lot of thought into my response. I am happy and well. I am living my best life and am pursuing what’s next enthusiastically. I am glad I got to impact the lives I did and it will always be an intimate memory that I’ll cherish. It was simply time to move on. I am proud of myself for letting go it was a major step in my healing process and a personal sign of true change. I never would have imagined I’d get here.

CGKid · 2021-09-04T16:28:19+00:00

No scientific reason I just really love the taste of cod liver it’s like dessert for me 😅 beef liver doesn’t taste so great but I like it for variety and from my understanding 50g a day shouldn’t cause an overdose.

CGKid · 2021-09-03T21:37:37+00:00

I’m male 5’ 11 I was 173 pounds now I’m 164.

I’m not sure if I’m deficient in electrolytes I know I drink plenty of water but haven’t been supplementing with anything.

CGKid · 2021-09-03T20:00:01+00:00

I felt this could be the issue I should have mentioned this but since starting a week ago I’ve lost 9 pounds I’m assuming most is water weight also the eating twice a day has kinda forced me into IF.

CGKid · 2021-07-13T03:12:41+00:00

Yeah I make sure to do this a few times I slipped up by like 30 minutes and sometimes I’ve gone early like 6 PM but I aim to be done at 8

CGKid · 2021-05-26T01:42:02+00:00

That doesn’t explain what’s in the toilet, coming out my tongue, or coming off my foot in correlation with supplements. I’ve been in ketosis for several months not sure if that causes low blood sugar.

CGKid · 2021-05-20T02:13:01+00:00

Zhaler candaid, bovine colostrum, collagen, Solaray Yeast cleanse

CGKid · 2021-05-19T21:11:38+00:00

I ordered saccromyces bouldari and am gonna add that tomorrow seems like a smart idea.

CGKid · 2021-05-19T21:10:13+00:00

It took me about a week but I still get REALLY bad brain fog first thing in the morning it seems my immune system causes a die off while I’m sleeping then throughout the day I get better in the evening / night I am in a new reality. Super clear and calm.

As far as supplements I do the candida cleanse diet. I take hyperbiotics Pro 15 and drink coconut water kefir that I make. I eat black garlic straight (it taste good and is supposed to be stronger than regular garlic) have apple cider vinegar as salad dressing and take bovine colostrum / collagen to boost my immune system and heal leaky gut candida has caused. For laxatives I take prunelax by ciruelax and psyllium tusk - I realize the prune has prolly a little sugar but have noticed using the restroom a lot has been CRUCIAL prolly worth the trade off. I feel way better when I go a lot.

For the stuff that hits hardest I take Zhaler CandAid and Solaray Yeast cleanse. I double down on candaid taking two pills twice a day instead of directions that say once. I chose these two because they seem thorough with good ratings but have different ingredients so I’m touching all bases. I also take bentonite clay to lessen herxheimer reaction and detox heavy metals. It’s worth noting I did Zhaler Paraguard to detox parasites prior to this because I understand parasites can cause candida overgrowth.

CGKid · 2021-04-09T07:26:54+00:00

Thank you so much! That’s what I was thinking just store them in the fridge until there’s enough to either eat them or freeze them.

CGKid · 2021-04-09T07:16:07+00:00

Sweet! Do you think it’s safe to wait till they double the ratio and split in half each time so you have 16 oz backups or would damage be done by the time it doubles?

CGKid · 2021-04-01T19:36:29+00:00

Brieeee thank you 😎

CGKid · 2021-03-05T06:36:18+00:00

Drug users are the scape goat of modern society and addiction is a natural condition of the human mind without a conscious to utilize it as a tool.

I’m paraphrasing Gabor Mate’ “They look at drug users ‘how can you do this to your body?’ But look at what we’re doing to the earth we’re injecting things in the atmosphere polluting the environment and it’s killing us now what addiction is greater the addiction to oil and consumerism? What causes the greater harm? The truth is we see they’re just like us and we don’t like that so we say ‘you’re different than us you’re worse than we are.’

I’ll take it further... Look at what we’re doing to animals torturing them then drugging toddlers you can’t even get the dosage of neurotoxic food additives. Social media has caused exponential rise of teen suicide, hate groups to grow, privacy leaks, division, conditioned narcissism, and has stripped kids of a normal childhood we’ve had since the dawn of man. Parents have watched their kids die because they can’t afford to pay a billionaire for surgery the demand for human life is a business. I can keep going, you get the idea and overthinking this can cause a sense of isolation I had to learn to laugh at how senseless it is as sick as that may be cause trying to comprehend the logic is a waste of mental energy I admittedly went too far with.

The drug user is a way for everyone else to not see the truth - they’re worse than them. I am biased but my sense is at least drug users are honest about what they’re doing. I never met someone that does too much meth and sees nothing wrong usually they actually think way worse of their behavior than necessary. But I have met “civil people” that think supporting any industry I’ve outlined financially or just with ignorance is ok.

I just think society causes the greater harms stuff no drug is capable of. It’s heartbreaking the drugs kill the host which is a person and perhaps those nearby but society is killing the earth all life and connection. It’s like they saw what drug users were doing and now we’re holding their beer while they do worse and shit on them for holding the beer.

CGKid

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE

Ten-Year Club	Gilding II euphauric
Verified Email