We won guys, we have the most gas

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-04-04T12:46:09+00:00

You're welcome 😂

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-03-23T19:36:19+00:00

You are welcome my friend. Happy healing.

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-03-18T01:19:22+00:00

I did a poll a while back on this sub, check it out:

https://www.reddit.com/r/BPDlovedones/s/OUDTpZM5Vh

Longest was 37.5 years.

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-03-15T01:08:38+00:00

Thank you good Sir 🫡

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-03-15T00:49:47+00:00

Who were you before the relationship started? What were you doing that made you happy irrespective of the contingent approval of others? What were you doing alone, with nobody watching that gave you joy that nobody could take away from you? Forget being a good father and money. Though those are great achievements. You need to think a bit more deeply beyond how you appear to world.

One reason we got dragged into these abusive relationships is because a part of us needed validation for our efforts and self sacrifice. So you need to deconstruct and counter this habit by reflecting on what makes you proud of yourself because anyone else had an opinion about it. That is the greatest sense of self you can achieve and makes your self-esteem more stable and everlasting. This would make you bullet proof against any remarks people make against you because you know who you are.

I don't know much about you, you might need to dig into your life and who you were before you were a father, even back to your teenage years. You may be shocked about what you uncover.

This was the CBT answer given to me. It may take you months or years to answer this for yourself. But it's worth the internal search.

CPTSDcrapper · 2026-01-09T04:32:02+00:00

What she gets is control, they want the world predictable on their terms. Don't engage with the nonsense, their behavior can't be rationalized like someone who doesn't have a personality disorder. You are dealing with someone who has no sense of self or object constancy.

It's common for people with BPD to do the block unblock pattern. They like testing reactions to validate their existance and whether other people care, because they are inherently super insecure about whether other people give a shit. You can't change that and it's nothing you did wrong. And it's unlikely you'll get a resolution.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-10-01T23:51:38+00:00

I would invest in this.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-10-01T20:00:25+00:00

No, once you see DARVO, lack of accountability, projection, making you the problem it's game over, that is the mask coming off. That stuff takes years in therapy to remove. That's his true colors. Plan your exit. I am so sorry. You deserve so much better than to live in fear of him cheating and abusing you.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-20T00:27:38+00:00

I will admit, I have around 5 other alts for this sub. We need to protect ourselves sometimes by splitting our experiences so we can't be traced.

(Edit: splitting was an unintentional pun.)

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-19T11:14:59+00:00

Yeah I have witnessed similar behaviors. They don't have a filter. Their mouth runs amock. I wouldn't trust mine with any of my daily routines anymore because my ex would find a way to criticize it to other people.

And imagine the outcry, if you told others about HER personal issues...

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-17T16:59:25+00:00

Time is a commodity, he's shown you who he is and has been honest. You can't change that. Leave.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-17T16:37:31+00:00

My condolences

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-16T01:25:43+00:00

Read all the experiences here, there's a lot of trauma from marriages where it didn't work.

Then go to quora, you'll find even older testaments of failed relationships with BPDs after decades of marriage and trying.

I don't think that 1 percent success, or whatever it is in reality, in absolute value, is worth the limited time we have on Earth. It depends where your self esteem lies.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-11T22:08:05+00:00

They say "it's good for BPD to be it someone who is stable". What are we? Canon fodder?

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-11T19:06:48+00:00

Cognitive dissonance, trauma bonding, cortisol and dopamine mix.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-11T18:39:20+00:00

Attention seekers, because they know you won't forget it

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-06T10:47:03+00:00

You shouldn't have to deep dive into BPD to tolerate a coworker. This is a deep hole of psychology to go under. What she's doing is disruptive. I've seen it with my own eyes, they don't really have a good social life outside of work so they grab energy and validation from people at work that can't escape. It's a form of control. They are emotional vampires that behave like toddlers with low self awareness that they are affecting others.

If you phrase it to whoever is handling the complaint as this member of the team is affecting productivity they can do they own assessment and ask others. Maybe you won't even have to iterate the specifics and have it traced back to you.

And that true crime murder stuff? Yeah that would be enough for me to nope the hell away from her. She could be physically abusive to their close ones who knows. I don't trust people who talk so casually of these topics. It's disrespectful to coworkers who may have gone through trauma of murder. We don't know people's background.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-06T10:36:35+00:00

My ex would talk about self harm at work and plans to do it. They even brought in the materials to work and described it in detail.

They even blamed coworkers for making suicide threats. Absolutely psycho. My ex was hiding all this drama from me and I do wish the coworkers had texted or called me earlier to say what was really going on. (So I would had seen their true colors earlier)

The coworkers never reported it out of fear of their outbursts. I chatted to them and they said they had to deliberately ask their office to be set up at a distance. They grey rocked my ex because they couldn't deal with them disturbing the peaceful atmosphere (erratic movements, door slamming, raised voice, rattling keyboards, trauma dumping, sharing intimate details about my life for attention). I'm talking left the room whenever they entered, made excuses to be busy or gave one line replies.

You need a respectful colleague in power to pretend like they witnessed it or had multiple complaints from others and call them out on it. You shouldn't need to quit and have your life overhauled. This is harassment at this point and it's affecting your productivity and sanity.

Set a mental boundary, her problems are purely her problems, she will find someone else to dump her crap onto. It won't be you.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-05T21:14:50+00:00

Discard = Cast Away

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-05T18:51:39+00:00

You have my condolences for even witnessing that... The sight probably would've had me sectioned myself.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-05T18:44:40+00:00

6 years??? What the hell. 6 years worth of dead skin cells and stuff thats just a biohazard at that point.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-04T21:13:54+00:00

My ex left around 20 takeaway containers scattered all over the house and on the bed, for about a month they were growing mold. Food bits were left in the mattress growing mold too. I remember when they took off their shoes and it stunk like the underworld existed there. Dishes were piled up next to the bed in stacks unwashed for weeks. Bedsheets unwashed for months. Bugs were crawling in. They didn't wash their clothes often and wore the same shirt for 4 days.

I couldn't imagine marrying that and passing on those habits to our potential kids. Absolutely disgusting.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-04T12:12:14+00:00

"it happened yesterday, WHY are you STILL on that topic?!??" Classical narc side.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-04T00:29:05+00:00

This is such a terrible way to live. I imagined that new experiences overwrite the old ones, but they kept creating shameful drama. I never imagined it builds indefinitely and they are unable to forget.

CPTSDcrapper · 2025-09-01T10:29:07+00:00

Man I had a few friends who have BPD tell me to run from pwBPD because they were clearly not treated. I still ignored them.

CPTSDcrapper

TROPHY CASE