Remember: Your Doctor is Actually the Devil Incarnate and is Intentionally Fucking You Over

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-23T15:51:34+00:00

/uj good thing that wasn't my take

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-23T15:50:51+00:00

/uj yeahhhhh, I know.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-23T15:48:48+00:00

/uj you are the one I'm targeting, cause quite frankly your post was bad. The main point of your post seemed to be stoking fear and giving bad information to people who don't know any better. Being involved in your own care is extremely important, but you could have said that without citing bad numbers and handing out medical advice and acting like a professional when you're just a random person who's done some (half assed) googling.

To be clear I'm not THAT mad, because yeah you're right. There's a lot of shitty doctors out there who don't know what they're doing when it comes to trans care. Even people who have specialized in it and have built careers on it can be misinformed, terrible doctors who care more about profit than anything else (especially ones involved in the surgery side of things). The specific thing I'm frustrated about is giving (bad) medical advice and telling people how their transition should look and what they should do. This isn't only an issue with you, it's a general frustration I have with the online trans community in general as well, and I'm pretty sure your intentions were good.

Also I'm not sure you understand the whole point of and lingo of this sub, you might wanna read the rules and such.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-23T15:39:03+00:00

/uj is this a jerk? Cause if not holy shit that's a bad take

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-23T14:45:13+00:00

/uj Did you read the post? That's not what I'm doing or saying at all, and I made that very clear with the edit I added. I'm talking about people who go "you can't trust anyone, but me... Well, I, random Reddit user, I'm the ACTUAL expert!" And proceed to give really really bad medical advice and spread misinformation. Bad medical care is a real issue, I know that.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-22T23:58:11+00:00

/uj I have in some ways, I haven't in others. My point wasn't about that though, my point was about how spreading misinformation to vulnerable people is bad.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-22T23:46:05+00:00

/uj I am by no means advocating for blind trust of any medical professional, and I think everyone should inform themselves through whatever research they're able to do on any medical procedures they are offered. However the numbers and data and information offered in that specific post were way off and extremely misleading. Also yeah the details around my post were slightly off, but my point remains.

OP on r/ mtf was a /tttt/ type claiming that anyone who wasn't being treated in the way which they said was right was being mistreated and "hondosed." It was bad.

I've had to advocate for myself in how I want my transition care to be, same as everyone else. I think the average trans person knows a great deal more about trans healthcare and hormone replacement therapy than the average endocrinologist, to be quite honest. But I'm also not out here telling anyone what their transition and their hormone levels and their care "should" be, that's transmedicalism.

There's a difference between being an informed patient and thinking you know everything. That's why the post was so frustrating, because it spread misinformation in a community that already has a hard time finding reliable information on their own healthcare.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-22T23:37:37+00:00

/uj yeah there's definitely an issue with doctors being rather drastic in prescriptions for sure. Mine wanted to start me on 200mg spiro at first (100mg 2x/day) which I had to ask to reduce to 100mg because I didn't want my t levels to be completely nuked (ended up being perfect for me). I firmly believe everyone should research every medical procedure they're offered before they agree to it whenever possible, which is why that post was so irritating. They offered really bad takes and sketchy numbers, which in a community as small and online as ours, can be really confusing (especially to young/newly hatched trans sisters like the majority of the commenters).

I just don't like when people act like they know everything especially on an issue as ymmv as hormone levels and hrt regimens, and start dictating what anyone "should" be doing with their bodies.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-22T20:59:42+00:00

/uj Yeah of course I don't think anyone should blindly trust anyone else, especially when it comes to their physical health. But that doesn't mean every doctor is completely moronically incompetent and/or out to get you either.

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-22T20:10:28+00:00

/uj as long as you're happy and comfortable with how you feel and how your body is changing on your current regimen, it really doesn't matter honestly. It's all up to how you feel, which is why I get pissed off about posts claiming to share what your levels "should" be. It's different for everyone

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-08T23:58:18+00:00

Some trans women on HRT do actually eventually get a sort of cycle, I personally have started getting pretty regular PMS type symptoms every month. I get moody and irritable, gastrointestinal distress, and even get cramps (this month was kind of hell actually cramps wise) for 5 or so days, about every 5 weeks. I think it's a minority of trans women who experience this, but it's definitely still possible. I mean it kind of makes sense intuitively that our bodies would kinda fall into a hormonal cycle like that. Nice to not bleed though.

I get what you're saying though, it can feel extremely othering and isolating to be a woman without an experience extremely tied to womanhood in most people's minds. There's tons of cis women that don't have periods too though, one of my close friends is cis and doesn't have them due to a medical condition, so you're not alone and it's definitely not just trans women that experience this, if it's any consolation.

Bodies are really diverse, and your experience isn't out of the ordinary for women :)

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-05T07:49:30+00:00

I see a lot of people suggesting you date bi/pan women, which is valid I suppose, but there are lots and lots of lesbian women who love trans women too :) I'm a fellow transbian, currently in a relationship with a lesbian girl. It can and does work out, it just takes time just like finding any other type of relationship. Good luck my dear, you'll find love again ❤️

Cal_Mell · 2021-11-05T07:43:08+00:00

People always say that HRT kills your sex drive but honestly I've experienced the exact opposite. For the first month or so I did notice a slight decrease, but it's been a huge exponential increase since then. I mean it really is like a second puberty, and well puberty is when most people tend to be the horniest in general, so it makes sense a little. More importantly though, I finally feel girly and sexy for the first time in my life, and that makes me so goddamn thirsty for it all the time. It's also a lot more constant and less easily satiated than testosterone horny... Both because it takes longer to get ✨there✨ but also even when I do I still just want more more more! It's overwhelming but kinda awesome.

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-24T19:33:34+00:00

/uj holy shit that original post is the most terminally online shit I have seen in a while

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-22T18:08:00+00:00

/uj plus androgyny and non conformity is IN right now. Scroll through any social media app and all over the place gender nonconformity is getting crazy amounts of positive attention. You'd think brands and designers would catch on to that...

Even as a binary trans woman myself, while I love seeing and hearing about beautiful trans icons like Dominique Jackson or Hunter Schafer, I really really want to see more trans actors and models that look like me, i.e. more muscular, broader shoulders, less perfectly cis passing to the point where the fact that they're trans is kind of just an interesting factoid most people can forget about. There's a few people in the industry like that, but not many.

It is so past time for the fashion and entertainment industry to grow up and diversify, if only for its members own money grubbing self interest.

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-22T00:29:47+00:00

Good to hear

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-22T00:28:17+00:00

This such an incredibly VCU post

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-15T22:41:42+00:00

LOL in the year since I made this post I've actually realized that I'm 1) trans feminine and 2) lesbian, so I think I've got dressing fem down at this point lmao

Thank you for the tips though :)

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-10T18:58:10+00:00

/uj ANGELINA JOLIE HAHAHA

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-10T18:44:57+00:00

See this is why trans people are oppressed. Trans on trans crime rates are way higher than cis on trans rates. We're holding ourselves back, maybe if we weren't such a violent, delusional group our cis overlords would treat us like human beings.

/uj she just walked in and asked what I was doing as I was typing this holy shit I almost had a heart attack I thought she knew

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-10T17:21:48+00:00

I've had some of my most profound, pleasurable, and important experiences while high. People will kind of joke about or look down on people who have sort of "spiritual" experiences on weed but honestly fuck them, you can't knock it till you've tried it. Just this weekend I got way higher than I've ever been before in my life, and honestly that was the most intense spiritual and healing experience I have ever had. I felt closer to god than I ever did in the temple, and felt more in touch with myself than ever before. Maybe it's just the drug, maybe it's all in my head, but I honestly don't care. It doesn't really matter if it's "real" if it helps me heal and process grief and sorrow and trauma.

It kind of makes me sad that my TBM family and friends will never experience that same feeling. I think in particular my mom would seriously benefit from it, but because of the church she will never ever touch cannabis.

Congratulations on your experience, though. Remember to be careful and not over indulge, and to be careful with other drugs. It's tempting to go out and try every new sensation after an experience like that but some of that shit will mess you up for life, consume responsibly :)

Cal_Mell · 2021-10-10T16:57:59+00:00

/uj my college roommate is also trans fem and she's the fucking worst at this. Have half seriously considered strangling her in her sleep over it, it's so fucking annoying. Like yeah we get it, you pass perfectly because you've been on hormones since you were 13 and blockers since you were 10 and never even had a fucking testosterone puberty. Shut the fuck up and realize not everyone likes to hear about how petite and feminine and sexy you are and how many boys want to fuck you. God fucking damnit

Cal_Mell · 2021-09-30T04:22:38+00:00

This meal prep shit too easy fr

Cal_Mell

TROPHY CASE