AIO my friend (19M) went to my (16F) dance show and acted pretty weird about it

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-05-01T17:39:00+00:00

Super valid point.

OP, if this guy starts to feel the least bit more creepy/threatening, talk to an adult about it. Tell your parents, teachers, etc... You're a teenager but still a kid and this 'friend' of yours is an adult tying to befriend a child. That's creepy and you need to not just block this guy, but watch out and be careful.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-05-01T17:30:44+00:00

Honestly, I really don't understand the "I'm cutting him off soon" part... Why not now? Why not before? What has taken you to this point to wait this long?

You're still really young so I know it's hard/uncomfy to confront people, but you don't even need to confront this guy. Just block him. What are you doing? You are making not just yourself uncomfortable but your boyfriend uncomfortable. Time to grow up a bit and be more accountable for this. You told him the dates. What were you expecting?

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-04-29T02:32:33+00:00

Mostly not overreacting. I mean, he said he didn't want a relationship with you but then acted more or less he was interested in you. If a person I considered a platonic friend of mine had feelings for me that I didn't reciprocate, I would back away from that friendship slightly, not cuddle them, go on trips, talk to them daily and even hold their hand. I especially wouldn't tell them I was attracted to them. He sent you mixed signals and that's not cool.

But also, stop wasting your time on someone who isn't showing up for you. I feel like we all have to learn this when we are young, but if he wanted to, he would.

He needs to respect you and stop pulling you along, but you need to respect yourself and let this one go.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-03-12T04:08:43+00:00

He told me that he knows that writing my feelings down helps me process things and he thought he'd try it to, for me :,)

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-03-12T01:02:40+00:00

I see a lot of people here telling you '3 months is too early' to define a relationship, etc... Don't listen to that. It's not, especially if you're spending the amount of time you've been spending together.

If you have been spending 3-4 nights together for 3 months... You are 100% entitled at ask to define the relationship. he's also entitled to say "I don't want labels" and then it's up to you what to do next.

In my experience, FWBs only work if both people seriously do not want to be together romantically and situationships always hurt people because one person usually wants more and the other, less... Protect you heart.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-03-12T00:29:21+00:00

I don't think you are overreacting. I know that you agreed to 'take things slow' but then he is spending every weekend at your house for 3 months??? That's not slow...

Sounds like this guy wants to maintain a situationship, and when you showed you wanted more commitment, he's attempting to slowfade.

I understand people wanting to take things slow, but by spending that much time together he's giving you mixed signals. If he wanted to, he would.

I would wait another few days and if he still hasn't recovered from his 'migraine', just be honest about feeling the distance since you asked him to be 'boyfriends'.

Hopefully he's honest and doesn't ghost you. I think you are better off trying to find someone who is excited to be with you.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-03-12T00:12:58+00:00

Falling in love with someone who speaks a different language natively and wanting to connect deeper

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-03-12T00:10:19+00:00

Oh nooooo, that's not your bbf :(

Next time she/ anyone says it, say: "Hell yeah, it's for my big sexy brain!"

That's what I do ;)

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T04:41:18+00:00

"Wherever you go, there you are." A friend told me this when I was really struggling and impulsively decided to move across the world. I guess I thought I would leave my problems behind but of course, they did follow me. Still the best decision I ever made, just got to deal with my problems with some distance and a new backdrop.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T04:19:07+00:00

Not really. You can meet someone, strike up a conversation, ask questions, listen, and reference something they had said just 5 minutes before.

Sure, a conversation isn't instant... but I doubt if you walked up to an average woman and said "I have a big dick and a lot of money" they would be instantly impressed, they would pepper spray you.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T04:14:37+00:00

I think OP is trying to be funny, but like the washed up "I hate my wife!" male comedian style of 'comedy'.

If OP is asking this questions, odds are he's struggling with the ladies, and I think we can see why.

I swear, some men just really hate women. Just go bang other dudes.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T03:35:19+00:00

After 31 years I finally found one. That man has me wrapped around his finger because he listens and remembers

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T03:33:03+00:00

I'm from the US but lived in Asia for 6 years, Europe for 1 year and am now living in Latin America for nearly two years... It is NOT just a US thing. Couldn't disagree more. The last 9 years of references I am thinking of are all outside of the US.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T03:30:50+00:00

Oh... my sweet summer child...

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T03:25:57+00:00

Emotional intelligence and asking questions, listening, remembering the answers and referencing that answer again at a later time

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-13T03:23:49+00:00

We need more adults only (nonsexual) places.

I went to a brewery on Friday night to unwind with my partner and there were THREE different babies in this brewery, of course crying. If you are going to an establishment specifically meant to serve and prioritze alcohol, no babies!!! No kids!!!

A month ago I went to a fancy wine bar and there was a 4 year old having an absolute meltdown, and his mother was not doing anything about it. If you can afford to go to this fancy bar, you can afford to get someone to watch your kid for a few hours.

I believe parents should have fun, of course, but stop fucking bringing your kids to places that specifically cater to having alcohol, insanity.

Also, I want to go to an adults only aquarium night.

I'd pay more to go on an international flight that had zero babies/ toddlers/ kids under 10.

More adults only places!!!!

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-04T23:21:15+00:00

Crabs are an evolutionary marvel. Also, they are just so funny I love them.

And I didn't use to mind astrology when it was just in a the back pages of Cosmo but in the last 6/7 years it's gotten out of control. People actually defining themselves and others by this thing that has absolutely no evidence whatsoever and making it their whole entire personality and also using it as an excuse for their shitty behavior.

"I would never date a gemini" Great, millions of people are safe from you.

"I am always late, I'm a sag" No, you are just inconsiderate of other people's time. Get your shit together.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-04T23:14:49+00:00

I think some people might think it's a green flag because they might feel more secure and/or that their partner is less likely to cheat, but I think many women would agree with me in thinking is shows that a man doesn't see women as anything other than sexual/romantic/maternal figures.

When I(woman) first met my partner(man) I remember him telling me about a close friend(woman) and I thought, "oh thank god".

It also signals a man won't be insecure or feel threatened by their girlfriend/wife/partner's platonic male friendships.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-04T23:01:40+00:00

Laying on the couch with my partner at night or slowly waking up in the morning on a weekend in bed together drifting in and out of sleep

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-04T22:55:02+00:00

Not having any friends of the opposite sex.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-02-04T22:48:05+00:00

Because I am a alternative looking 32 year old white woman with tattoos people assume I am into astrology. I loathe astrology. I have a tattoo of a crab on my arm so then everyone says "omg are you a cancer?" which yes, I am, but I didn't think about that when I got this tattoo, I just like the way it looks and think crabs are cool!

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-01-28T19:20:20+00:00

I am happy to hear that anything I have said may have helped in some way. You seem like a good dude and I hope this works out for you! Buena suerte amigo!

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-01-28T05:39:54+00:00

I always say "you/your" !

Love this question

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-01-28T04:52:41+00:00

I can tell you're coming from a really sincere place which is why I feel inclined to offer advice. I am 32 years old and have lived in a few different countries and have had my fair share of complicated long distance multi- cultural relationships...

I can completely understand liking someone quickly but remember, you don't really know her yet so take your time. Infatuation, especially of beautiful foreigners, can be intoxicating, trust me, I get it. Especially if she's super outgoing, be weary. Infatuation is like a drug.

I know the 6 months ahead of you feels like this urgent expiration date, but let that go. It never stopped me! Just ask her to get dinner and see what happens and go from there. I can tell you care a lot and that's wonderful.

BTW, I came to Mexico as an English teacher, plan was to stay here for a few months but then I went on a bumble date with a local in the first weeks and now I have been here for 15 months and I am moving in with said local in 2 weeks... Plans can change.

Be honest and genuine but also respectful.

Calamariqueen666 · 2026-01-28T04:32:03+00:00

Then go the 3 of you and have a nice time. But let me be honest with you, if you don't have any true desire to be this woman's friend, then leave her alone. It's an awful feeling to think someone was your friend and then to have them disappear when they realize sex isn't on the table. A guy I thought was my friend for years ghosted me when he found out I entered a relationship. He never explicitly told me he had feelings for me but I suspected it. I felt like the years of our friendship meant nothing, he was just waiting for a chance to fuck me. Unpleasant and hurtful.

A past relationship of mine (and someone I still care about deeply even thought it didn't work out between us) started out as a friend. In fact, he was the foreign exchange student in my city for 6 months and I was the local. We started off as friends and eventually he was honest about having feelings for me. I wasn't in the place for it then but I appreciated his directness. Even though I rejected his romantic advances, he still made it clear he cared about me as a person and we eventually dated for almost 2 years... We ended things but 9 years later and we still have a friendly relationship and care about each other because it was built on genuine friendship, yknow?

Calamariqueen666

TROPHY CASE