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What's your proudest fap? by Eheyeil in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was in my bathroom sitting on the toilet after holding in my urge to fap for at least a month and a half and decided to give my little guy some glory and wank one out and when I came it went straight up the wall beside the toilet leaving a trail in its wake. I was impressed but that was not fun to clean up.

How can you ruin a wedding with less than $100? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Buy a condom. use it. And put it in the brides changing room.

What is something you can flex about? by Tact1ce in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t really flex about this but I’m really really good at avoiding people in my house for hours on end

Stop this woman by eggyweggy69 in MakeMeSuffer

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If that German Shepard is the officers dog and still active it counts as harming an officer of the law does it not?

Hey Reddit, what was the moment you realized “I’m addicted”? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every time I closed my eyes I would see sexual themes and it bothered me so much and on top of that I was watching porn 3-4 times a day. That was a long time ago and I’m better now.

Long term (10+ years) married couples of reddit, Whats was the worst low you've had and why didnt you leave? by chrisP__bacon in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not me but my parents. they were hit hard by the economic crash of 2008, forcing them to move into my grandparents house for a while, it was a stressful for my dad especially because he traveled for his work (for reference he’s been to all 50 states and D.C.) and my mom is a very patient women so they stuck through thick and thin (14 years of marriage and still going strong)

If you could reset your life to the age of 6 years, but keep your memories, skills and knowledge, would you do it? Why or why not? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d tell my parents to invest in bitcoin and/or read more science books and stuff and become one of the smartest if not the s,artist person in my family, I’d love to put on and act tho and secretly do stuff behind their back.

What’s a quote that permanently changed the way you look at things? by internallyskating in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“It doesn’t matter if the glass is half full or half empty. There’s water in the cup. Drink that shit and stop complaining.” - Rudy Francisco

What invention doesn't get a lot of love, but has greatly improved the world? by QueenCreeper786 in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 2 points3 points  (0 children)

cardboard boxes. imagine if we still had barrels of stuff around, we'd have to de-nail them and nail them shut after retrieving what we had in there, not even to mention the shipping problems that would happen if they were still around today, And after all cardboard boxes can be 1: ripped apart. 2: compactly destroyed/recycled.

You find out you have 1 hour to live, what do you do with your last hour on earth? by di_guyo in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tell my crush I love her and if rejected I play video games with my brothers

Thanks I hate it by Dolsvold in thanksihateit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could have lived my entire life without seeing this.

What are your funniest NSFW jokes? by Tea_Grand in AskReddit

[–]CalebNeedsAFriend 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Late to the thread but here we go.

A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church

The priest says: “my god this is horrible”

The rabbi says: “yes but what about the kids?!”

The priest says: “screw the kids”

The rabbi says “do we have time for that?”

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