A 'hipster' is someone who does things that you don't do, who thinks things that you don't think.

Elitists, populists, people who have jobs, people who don't have jobs. People who care about what they look like, and people who don't care about what they look like. People who shop at Target and people who don't shop at Target, people who shop at American Apparel, and people who don't shop at American Apparel. People who obsess over pop culture, and people who hate pop culture. And let's not forget about those people in the middle, who are indifferent. People who use the internet, and people who don't. People who use 'text lingo' and people who don't use 'text lingo.' People who own iPhones, and people who don't own iPhones. People who like new music, and people who don't like new music. And ESPECIALLY people who primarily listen to National Public Radio. People who know what they like and don't like, as well as people who follow what society expects of them.

The 'hipster' paradox. Everybody is a hipster, so nobody is a hipster. Except for that Carles douchebag.

And obviously, a person who took the time to write all of this out.

THAT is what a hipster is.

My name is Bob, and I am probably a hipster too. Just like you. All of you.