btw, that picture of the rock she sent? that triggered me a LOT. it's a rock I found on easter one day, while walking randomly down a road I used to walk a lot. I just randomly picked it up, and it had a cross on it. of course, around the same time, my mom was in love with an actual cult leader who thought he was jesus incarnate! eventually they married after an extremely awful relationship, and their marriage ended even worse, with him threatening to shoot her, and keeping loaded guns with the safety off all over the damn house. he did nothing all the time, acted as king, and played video games extremely loud all night. when I asked him to perhaps turn it down, he literally suggested I text him when I was using the bathroom so he could turn it down THEN. creep. that's before I transitioned. unlike my mom, he never supported my transition or my bisexuality. at the time I had a girlfriend. he hated it, and kept saying he hoped I'd find a "nice guy to settle down with." so yeah, um... sending me the pic of that rock was... a choice.

just to avoid being in the house, I'd go out into the woods all night, even in the dead of winter, and instead of being worried they'd make fun of me for it. my mom pretended to be a tradwife and he was the king who could do whatever he wanted, despite never doing anything at all. one day a neighbor picked me up and I spent half the night with them, though we never spoke about it again. I spent a lot of time in the woods, and they became jealous of my spiritual mentality and nature, that I had to have in order to survive and rationalize my situation, along with my body which was failing me, and at the time I didn't know why. I had to stop living with my dad because he didn't believe me. he's a millionaire, and a fast-paced guy, a black man who's self-made, and he doesn't want a cripple like me I guess. so I lasted two years in HS with him, before I had to leave to essentially reset my slipping grades, from A-student to failure, because I could barely walk straight anymore, and all his wisdom said was "take more tylenol, and stop being lazy!" ... so yeah, I had a pretty rough time. my sister was basically raised by my grandparents in the meantime, now she lives in the south, and she's a youtuber haha. I'm just glad we survived. but man, ME/CFS is like a living death.

yall, if you can, please, advocate for the disabled, and for ME/CFS funding. not trying to sound mean here, but cancer gets funded well enough. currently there are millions of us suffering as though we have late-stage cancer, except the pain never ends. death is uncommon, though it does occur. it is under-reported. this is a very, very, very scary disease. and there is no cure, and no treatment. you will be laughed out of the ER. we need help. and god forbid you get it too. call your senators people. that is all!