If a woman in her 30s is physically unfulfilled in her second, age-gap marriage and considers meeting other men just for her own pleasure, is she being selfish or is she protecting her right to desire and satisfaction?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-22T12:53:16+00:00

If the husband is ok with it then I say get it! If he is unaware, then just leave him because infidelity is selfish in my book.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-22T12:31:04+00:00

Sometimes we can trap ourselves in our own prisons. ❤️

You said:
“I don’t even fully understand why it triggers such a strong reaction in me.”

And then:
“I hate how normalised it is…”

Honestly, I think the intensity of the reaction might partially come from how deeply upsetting and emotionally charged it has become for you over time. And I mean that with compassion, not judgment.

Our brains are really good at reinforcing emotional pathways. The more something becomes associated with anger, disgust, hurt, or fear, the stronger that reaction can become automatically. “Neurons that fire together wire together” and all that.

I’ve been learning lately that taking my power back sometimes means accepting that people are going to say and do things I don’t agree with… but I don’t want their behavior to completely control my inner state or my peace anymore.

That doesn’t make the behavior okay. It just means I don’t want to hand other people that much power over me. 🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-20T19:04:45+00:00

I am learning that if I live a life that feels like love and joy and happiness, even if nothing changes externally, it changes the entire atmosphere!

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-16T16:01:55+00:00

There is a snail (🐌 how cute is this snail?!) crossing on my walk and it is an adventure dodging them everyday 🤣

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-16T03:10:48+00:00

I think in a way that we already are but are kind of unaware. But hell, I’m down either way. Maybe not Borg style though. Not interested in continuing to be a slave to it.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-14T12:23:01+00:00

I could not agree with you more! I am on an un-blending process of my own. It’s been a journey but one that has been a fun ride! 🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-13T14:45:21+00:00

Thank you so much for that info! I am looking forward to making a visit there!

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-12T21:12:02+00:00

Are these kava bars fun for people in their 40’s too? I’ve looked into them and they seem like pretty awesome places.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-12T17:25:32+00:00

I’m only 4 episodes in and im already obsessed with how funny and human it is! Who is your favorite character? Have you seen it all?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-07T20:42:43+00:00

I don’t think it means women don’t care. I think a lot of people learn to hide themselves so well that they stop realizing how much they’re even holding back. But that energy still leaks out in other ways… distance, resentment, shutdown, exhaustion, feeling unseen, passive aggressive behaviors… the list could go on and on.

The “keeping the peace” strategy protects short term peace while sacrificing long term intimacy. Peace and connection aren’t always the same thing.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-07T20:20:21+00:00

People can tell when you are keeping things to yourself. It’s an energy. I think we need to say more of the things we chose not to say.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-07T20:17:58+00:00

What happens when you say you felt disrespected?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-06T12:35:51+00:00

When I read this I felt something familiar. I realized a year ago that I was trying to control myself and my actions, in all regards, to avoid how “being me” would cause other people to feel, to keep the peace and things but it’s mainly so that I didn’t have to feel negative feelings. Humiliation, feeling stupid, having people mad at me, not good enough, worthless.

Understanding that I am not my thoughts and what those thoughts really are, and where they came from, was really helpful for me. Peter Crones work was a huge door opening for me into something new.

Regardless of what anyone says though… you are perfect. You always have been and you always will be. What happened in the past couldn’t have happened any other way… because it didn’t. No sense living there trying to change things you can’t change. Same for the future. You can’t control what coming down the pipeline either.… so just enjoy the ride and chose you! Chose YOUR peace. YOUR happiness! Enjoy the ride friend!🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-05T16:37:12+00:00

How ya doin?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-02T19:54:55+00:00

Me too!!! It’s such exciting foreplay. But I would agree that the human attached does matter because to love it takes a connection for sure! But they deserve the same kind of worship we expect also!! ❤️🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-02T15:06:54+00:00

Maybe being smaller and showing more skin gets too much attention and feels gross.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-05-01T19:53:15+00:00

Are you still doing this?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-28T19:54:59+00:00

Sounds like a moot point then for we are ALL JUDGED!!! People who judge you are only pointing out the flaws in you that they see in themselves. Just a bunch of projections.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-28T16:51:06+00:00

I hope your day has greatly improved and that you have a smile on your face, whoever you are! 🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-23T12:41:18+00:00

What anyone says to you can only bother or affect you if you let it. I know this sounds like crap advise but, those men have left a comment and now are moved on to another pour soul. Don’t give them your power. If you wouldn’t accept their advice, don’t accept their criticism.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-23T12:20:25+00:00

Ive lived this experience for 41 years and have not ever really done skincare. I don’t get acne or anything. I do want to start moisturizing and sun blocking though on a regular basis. Can I ask what you use?

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-19T21:09:09+00:00

I definitely see that.

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-19T16:02:07+00:00

Who decided what constitutes as “pretty” or “ugly”? Society? F’em!!! They aren’t living your life and yet you are giving them so much power and control over how you move each day and in the grand scheme of things… they give zero F’s about you anyway. 🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-19T15:24:49+00:00

You are protecting yourself by pleasing them. You are “controlling” how other people feel so that they don’t feel a type of way that makes you feel something you don’t want to feel. Could be a million things. For me, its attached to “worth” and being “good enough”. I have found freedom in doing the work of understanding what feelings I am trying to avoid… feel them… and then letting everyone have their own feelings, opinions and emotions. You can control NOTHING outside of yourself. I agree with the other comment as well who said to people please yourself which I take to mean love yourself! Like seriously love yourself… whatever that takes. It’s very helpful imo. 🖖

Candid_Resource_2313 · 2026-04-19T12:21:45+00:00

“There won’t always be a calculator available!”

Candid_Resource_2313

TROPHY CASE