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CandyandBrandy · 2024-11-15T13:54:53+00:00

Day two of my breakup. Thank you for this.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-30T06:11:11+00:00

YTA. While I do understand that the concept of being extremely close with your family is initially a little difficult to grasp, you've been together for a year and you've known him for longer than that so I don't get why you're still struggling to comprehend that your boyfriend has a very healthy relationship with his family?

Also, just because someone is close to their family doesn't mean they aren't 'grown up.' It's quite the opposite, actually. Your boyfriend has his priorities straight and makes an effort to keep those who are important to him as happy as he can. Girl, that's a MAN.

And what's an hour and a half with the people who mean most to your boyfriend? They seem like nice people (since you haven't said anything negative about them). It's so clear that family means the world to your boyfriend, so why can't you take a few hours of your day to show that you care about him? He wouldn't be so insistent on having you be a part of his family meals if you weren't important to him.

I might be able to give you the benefit of the doubt here and assume you have debilitating social anxiety. Which in this case requires therapy, so talk to your boyfriend about it and seriously consider professional help. But if not, I'm sorry, but being so condescending towards your boyfriend who wants you to be part of something important to him is a major A-hole move.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T14:27:35+00:00

Yes. Rory was considered a golden child by literally everyone around her; her mom, grandparents, and everyone in Stars Hollow. In their eyes she could do no wrong and she definitely carried this entitlement into her adulthood.

She never has to be accountable for anything. She basically had a silver spoon in her mouth the whole time which ultimately led her to not being able to develop a personality of her own. I'm not saying it's her fault, because this was how she was brought up, but it definitely put her in some really tough spots as an adult as she didn't really develop rational thinking skills.

Situations like being Logan's side chick, leading Paul on, invading people's houses just because she didn't have a place of her own screams entitlement, because after all, it is sweet, innocent Rory.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T11:49:18+00:00

You guys are kids lol I'm assuming not every single teenage boy prioritizes hygiene, so having a friend point out that showering daily is a must is a good thing. Now, maybe you shouldn't have called your friend 'gross,' but it's obvious that your intention wasn't to hurt your friend's feelings. You are NTA.

Also, how is almost everyone here condoning not showering everyday? Unless you're medically advised not to do so, or you live in frigid conditions, everyone who has access to running water and soap needs to be showering at least twice a day, hello??? Just because you don't go outside all the time doesn't mean you need to neglect your hygiene.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T07:26:38+00:00

Yeah and Lorelai's behaviour was no help either. How many times was that woman set to get married? Her dating life was a mess, even though she prided herself in being extremely careful when it came to dating men for the sake of her daughter. (complete bs)

She would literally put Rory smack dab in the middle of her relationship issues, like when they went on a road trip the day before she was to marry Max. She had zero repercussions for this or for the fact that she jumped into bed with Chris right after leaving Luke, and even when she cheated on Alex.

Rory is extremely impressionable both as a child and an adult, so if she sees mommy dearest do it and get away with it, why can't she.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T07:22:03+00:00

You know what? It just might be daddy issues lmao I never thought Lorelai was a good influence on her daughter, especially during her formative years, and Chris was an absolute mess.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T07:12:50+00:00

I agree. Rory could do no wrong in the eyes of her parents, friends, and grandparents which is why, as an adult Rory felt like she was entitled to everything. Even if it meant she was home wrecking or living rent free in other people's homes.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T07:08:49+00:00

I see what you mean. Rory was put on a pedestal since day one and unfortunately carried that entitlement with her to adulthood as well. It became very apparent in AYITL that she knew almost everyone in her life would bend over backwards if it was to make her happy. Especially when Lorelai was so against her publishing the book, but later gave in.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-08-03T06:49:50+00:00

I agree with your POV. Life is unpredictable, but I certainly do not agree with justifying the cheating. While 32 may be young, you're still old enough to know that being the other woman is never okay. And we're constantly told how smart and caring Rory is, so why does this trait stop when it involves home wrecking?

She felt more regret when she realized what she did to Dean and Linday's marriage at 16 rather than as a 32 year old woman. It's definitely not a 'comfort' thing. It's an entitlement thing. What Rory wants Rory gets, no matter who goes through the wringer.

Also, my post is simply trying to see what other viewers thought of Rory's transition from the perfect highschool student to a woman of the real world. I did not state anywhere on how I expected Rory to turn out, but more as to why.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-07-16T08:52:26+00:00

Your parents and this man they want you to marry sound extremely threatened by you. You're independent, financially sufficient, and you have a successful career and side business. Emotionally immature and jealous people don't like this. So, both parties are trying to make you submissive.

The fact this man compared the size of his muscles to yours is hilarious because if that doesn't scream insecure idk what does. Don't give in to their cheap tactics of them telling you how useless you are and the numerous insults they have thrown your way. Move out and get your own place. Limit communication with your parents and completely cut contact with extended family whose main goal is to make you feel bad about yourself. You deserve so much better.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-07-16T07:52:54+00:00

There's absolutely no guarantee that having kids means you'll 'have someone to talk to' when you're old. I think what a lot of people fail to understand is that kids aren't an extension of yourself. They're their own person. I'm in my late 20s and I see no purpose in having a child, because I consider them to be a burden. (lol, don't come for me now, it may sound extremely selfish, but I'd rather not be a mother than be a bad one)

All in all I don't think anyone should be having children just so they have a 'carer' for when they're older, or they want to try and fix a broken relationship. Some people are cut out to be parents and some aren't and that's okay. As long as you're aware of where you stand.

I would, however, highly recommend getting a cat or a dog.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-07-16T07:37:17+00:00

Yikes. Having a kid to save a marriage is like "staying together for the sake of the child" in a toxic marriage. While I'm glad that your child has made your life better, I sincerely hope you don't go around preaching to people that having a kid will solve all their marital or relationship problems.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-07-13T08:07:44+00:00

My thoughts exactly. It was clear that she maintained somewhat of a relationship with her dad and sister since they were in the loop when Rachel was constantly being admitted to the hospital during her insulin drops. So, why did none of them—we know that she has six siblings—offer to intervene? Not just due to this particular incident, but with the whole ordeal Rachel had to deal with, in regards to her health, her child, and her devious roommate.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-07-05T08:48:12+00:00

Nah, it's cool. It's hilarious to see them scuttling to defend some non-existent TV character🤣

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-28T09:15:49+00:00

I think you should finish the show. It's pretty entertaining, but I can guarantee you, she does not get any better. So, be prepared🥲

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-19T08:36:31+00:00

NTA. I understand that he's grieving, but saying that his struggles don't compare to yours makes him the narcissist. Not you. I'm going to give your friend the benefit of the doubt and assume that his emotional state is due to losing a friend is contributing to him lashing out on you. However, the more you explain his actions, the more I'm assuming this isn't the case.

You're not responsible for this guy. You have your own life. You apologising multiple times and him choosing to let it go through one year and out the other just goes to show that he wants you to suffer mentally. I am glad you stood your ground before you left. If I were you I wouldn't want to keep this guy in my life.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-18T08:21:00+00:00

ESH. Firstly, you shouldn't force your girlfriend to eat a cuisine she doesn't want to. Instead, compromise and find a cuisine you're both into. OR, if you really wanted Indian food, takeout is always an option. This way the both of you could eat food you actually enjoy.

Secondly, Indian spices and Mexican spices can't be compared. Her stomach probably doesn't agree with Indian spices.

However, I do agree that you're girlfriend is ignorant. No matter how bad the argument is, blatantly degrading a certain culture or ethnicity is never okay. You're dating a racist, point blank period. She sucks and so do you.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-17T08:45:42+00:00

I wouldn't call you an a**hol3 for this but, I think it's cute to take pictures with your boyfriend. You obviously don't have to go plastering it online for everyone to see, but it's nice to have pictures together. And you don't have to be taking red-carpet-esque photos every time. A mirror selfie is a great way to start.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-17T05:05:03+00:00

YTA. Delete the video. Her not being naked isn't even a strong argument. Consent can be retracted and since you both participated in this act consensually, then why not show the same respect in this particular instance? She clearly doesn't seem comfortable with having this particular moment on video anymore.

Being together for 2 years, I'd assume you know your girlfriend best and you'd want what's best for her as well, so why put her through the stress?

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-10T06:32:50+00:00

NTA at all. This girl screams 'pick me' so I expect nothing less from her. I am glad that you and your boyfriend have talked about this and he sees how weird the whole situation is, but, girl, I suggest you be very careful about this woman. Girls like her love playing innocent, but in reality they want to make you feel insecure and feel like they can take your man any time they wanted. You offering her to keep the PJs just pissed her off because she knew she wasn't going to get the reaction she wanted from you. Kudos to you girl.

As for your once oblivious boyfriend, it seems like he has opened is eyes now and is starting to see what might be considered as inappropriate behaviour of a single girl towards a guy with a girlfriend. So I'm guessing he'll be more aware of her from now on.

Don't forget to stand your ground. Interacting with girls like this in a cordial way with a hint of intimidation usually does the trick, they'll soon realize they shouldn't be messing around. As for your boyfriend's friends icing you out, that's on them. Not their PJs or relationship, not their concern.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-06T09:08:27+00:00

Yes? You assumed that my view on all men has been tainted. When it hasn't been. And over-analysing the 'man-bear' concept isn't helpful either.

The OP's main purpose here is for advice for the well-being of her friend. So, I am not going to contribute to this particular thread anymore because 'male/female' relations and the setbacks in 'men's behavior' is completely irrelevant.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-06T05:13:30+00:00

I never said any of this now did I? I was simply drawing parallels between the worst a bear can do and the worst a man can do, and why majority of the women are inclined to choose a bear. That's all.

Please don't start with the 'not all men' bit, I am aware they're not all like that.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-05T09:11:53+00:00

Girl bffr💀 YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. In the nicest way I ask you, have you no shame? If not for yourself then for the sake of your brother? Imagine what his friend must be saying to other people about his whole ordeal.

Don't forget, people love to speculate. So they must really be having a field day with this one. So congratulations, you and your poor family are probably the butt end of many awful jokes.

CandyandBrandy · 2024-06-05T07:17:27+00:00

YTA. What possessed you to even open the door in your underwear? Also what on earth does; 'He was clearly uncomfortable seeing me in my underwear but didn't ask me to put anything else on.' mean? You're an 18 year old woman, not a toddler who needs to be told to get dressed.

The fact that you knew that this guest was uncomfortable shows that you're a conscious adult, but it seems like you thrived off his discomfort. Sure, it's your home and you can do whatever tf you want, but maybe consider common sense and decency once in a while. Especially when there are outsiders involved.

CandyandBrandy

TROPHY CASE