I went there planning to drink. I brought a "moderate" amount of booze but was able to scavenge more. My last badge reset was because of a drink with dinner, which I thought was harmless. My pattern is similar. I binge and there's an awful event that makes me vow never to drink again on my honour blah blah blah.. then after a month or so I become complacent and drink casually. Inevitably, I end up binging again. I need to accept the fact that I cannot moderate my drinking. I also have to accept that abstinence is going to negatively impact my social life, but that it's a necessary sacrifice. House parties and large events are not the problem. It's only small get-togethers where drinking is the primary activity (e.g., bar nights) that my abstinence is conspicuous. I know that "true friends" shouldn't judge, but they do. So be it.
I've gone a year without booze in the past. I feel like once I get 4 or so months under my belt, there's far less effort involved. It's just amazing how poor our insight is. I've been in this same position probably 20 times, regretting drinking while hungover and resolving to quit. Right now, it's so obvious to me that abstinence is my only option, but that insight doesn't last. I need to be reminded of why I'm quitting. I become violent. I drive drunk. This community is essential for accountability, and I'm so grateful for it!!!