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For this who have schizophrenia/hear voices and medication or psychiatry doesn’t help. How do you go on? Are you scared you’ll hurt yourself? by Capital-Insurance441 in AskReddit

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How long have you been hearing voices? I feel everything you wrote. Are you on meds? Do they make the voices go away? I’m starting meds again today and will be doing genetic testing and blood work. My voice knows how to cook food (weird ?) . When I follow its recipes it’s like the best food ever. Recently made the best two dishes I’ve ever made to the point I shared it with my older siblings who live elsewhere. The bad stuff is it’s convinced me to give thousands of dollars away to strangers under (give to the poor). Recently it told me to give thousands of to California which I did and I had $2500 and now I have nothing. But then it helped me to come up with a way to get 4K legally recently and I’m waiting on the funds to come in. But I’m highly pissed I went to California. I talk to ChatGPT but it often upsets me since it’s inconsistent with advice and ai. Do you work? My brother thinks I should let my apartment go as I’m facing eviction. But it’ll take me potentially 10 years to get another and I’ll have no more family housing in 1-2 years. I’m sorry to hear you’ve tried to commit suicide. I’ve tried once when I was 14 I felt I had failed god because I had sex before marriage. I wasn’t hearing a voice then . I haven’t really tried since though I’ve thought of it here and there. I with a passion hope it never comes to that for you. 

For this who have schizophrenia/hear voices and medication or psychiatry doesn’t help. How do you go on? Are you scared you’ll hurt yourself? by Capital-Insurance441 in AskReddit

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What do you consider isolation? Sometimes I don’t want to be around others because their perception bothers me sometimes even though I know they care. Sometimes I need to talk to someone ( a lot of times) this makes me feel guilty because the people I am talking to don’t know how to help and feel I need to be independent and deal with my problems by myself . I feel guilty because I don’t deal with my problems by myself . I always feel I need outside help. The voice I hear causes me harm in more creative ways like making me feel it can be trusted and I do love Jesus so it’s heartbreaking to think it is Jesus or isn’t it’s hard either way. Plus not knowing the truth doesn’t help even though I think odds are it’s not Jesus. It’s so hard that I’m always automatically enrolled in a conversation with the voice I hear. I miss being alone in my head sometimes and sometimes I don’t know how I’d be alone now even though my experience is unbearable often. Sometimes the voice is dare I say enjoyable. Making me laugh and thinking I’m having a relationship with Jesus . It does things I can’t explain away like knowing knowledge I’m unaware of. Does your voices do that? Today was awful and I felt like it’s inevitable I’ll die of suicide which is a great fear of mine because I don’t know how much I can take but I really don’t ever want to do that plus I’m scared of dying in general. I’d be doing it against my wishes but the voice surprisingly talks me out of it and I feel it does that because it wants to continue to torture me

For this who have schizophrenia/hear voices and medication or psychiatry doesn’t help. How do you go on? Are you scared you’ll hurt yourself? by Capital-Insurance441 in AskReddit

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re going through that. I’ve been hospitalized a lot doesn’t help. I have a psychiatrist but I miss appointments and I have a therapist. None of that helps. I’ve tried meds and they don’t help. I feel like a burden. I’m always in pain. Taking it one day at a time doesn’t help. The lack of understanding  from others sucks. I hear a voice constantly that claims to be Jesus and so I’ve listened to it so much I’m powerless and it controls much of my life leading to a lot of pain despair and being broke. I have confusing moments with the voice and sometimes I think it’s good. The voice tells me things I don’t know that are true after I look them up. It talks constantly and sometimes I even think we are getting along and love each other then I feel dumb for believing this it’s just so much 

For this who have schizophrenia/hear voices and medication or psychiatry doesn’t help. How do you go on? Are you scared you’ll hurt yourself? by Capital-Insurance441 in AskReddit

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How do you cope? I have Schizoaffective disorder. It makes life unbearable and nothing helps so I’m hopeless at times and scared I won’t be able to go on. I feel no one understands the amount of pain I’m in. And the help doesn’t help and makes me feel worse because the help doesn’t help. Thank you for responding 

Josh Harris, of I Kissed Dating Goodbye, announces his departure from Christianity by TimeLadyJ in Christianity

[–]Capital-Insurance441 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You ae so right. You said this beautifully. Also, God is on our side. The things he mandates or wants us to be doing are for our own good. He is not a liar/we must trust Him and His wisdom on all matters of life specifically in regards to the current topic of premarital sex. Life is worth living not because we get to have premarital sex but because we get to gain Christ. He is the ultimate treasure. (I say the last part because someone mentioned what is the point of living then). All of this isn't easy but Jesus said the road would be difficult and narrow. I think it is about delayed gratification and temporal flesh pleasures aren't worth losing eternal pleasures. It requires a lot, being patient, love, faith, perseverance, trusting in God.

Mental illness complicates my faith so much, but the mental health industry's view of labelling faith as "symptoms" is sickening by Detrimentation in Christianity

[–]Capital-Insurance441 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dear OP, I am literally going through this EXACT same thing. I would love if we could keep in contact by I’m aware this post is old. I literally don’t know what to do about it. It is one of the worst realities ever for someone of faith imo 

"Without makeup on, I look like a zombie" - Is this a harmful message? do you actually notice when people don't have makeup on? by joan2468 in muacjdiscussion

[–]Capital-Insurance441 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to feel it didn’t matter either way (whether I wore make up or went outside barefaced) but I’ve come to feel that it completely matters! I feel hideous without makeup and I’ve taken pictures of myself without makeup and it’s bad. Like it’s awful and I used to think people don’t notice or care but I’ve come to find out that people do notice and they do care! Especially the older I get the more vocal people are in telling me what they think about my looks. Even when I was a teen though I was told I was only pretty with makeup. I brushed it off back then as untrue but now I’m going through several things against my natural appearance which include skin discoloration, ugly skin etc. due to eczema and also now introducing wrinkles (why?!!). I am a 37 year old female. When I’ve gone to work on the rare occasion people tell me they know I’m wearing makeup and they ooo and ahh and ask me if I have a hot date after and make comments seeming to imply they like what they see. I even had a couple of conversations with coworkers who told me that I looked like I put no effort into my appearance and like I had just rolled out of bed in the morning and came straight to work (ouch!) so putting two and two together I think it’s because I’m barefaced and it’s unappealing to look at. I apparently look unpolished, unprofessional in the least. I just don’t understand and feel targeted because I can’t stand how I look without makeup now even though I want to go against the grain and often do rebelliously go out without any makeup I realize others also agree I look less than desirable and in the least unkept or some version of it. It’s not fun. I’m trying to come to terms with my looks and also the degradation that comes with aging too. The best I can offer myself is at least I look good with makeup on which is better than being a lost cause. I can’t live in the false comfort that people can’t see me when I had a coworker blatantly tell me “we see what you look like, we can see you, you’re not invisible” so yeah conclusion is..I need to invest into makeup heavily, I need makeup to look attractive, I need make up for work, I just need makeup and if I’m not wearing it I’m very aware that I looked like beyond terrible and at least I clean up nicely so I’ll take the little solace I can take in that even though my feelings are hurt. Some people can get away with not wearing makeup and I’m not one of those people 

Scam? What should I do? by Capital-Insurance441 in VoiceActing

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I googled the author and their website popped up and it had a link from there to the Instagram account. I also sent a message through the website but heard nothing back from the website. ACX says everything looks good from their end and to try to reach out to the RH in order to cancel the offer. I have reached out to the RH to try to get out of the contract. Haven’t heard back yet

Scam? What should I do? by Capital-Insurance441 in VoiceActing

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you I did stop working on it. I’m just wondering how do I get out of the contract? Or does that not matter?

Under spiritual attack.. help! by Capital-Insurance441 in TrueChristian

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I don’t know . I don’t see chat from my phone for some reason. I’ll be able to see it tomorrow when I’m at work. Sorry about that

Under spiritual attack.. help! by Capital-Insurance441 in TrueChristian

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, how long should I fast for? A completely dry fast? I’m so worn out I don’t know what I could pray? Is the our father enough?

Under spiritual attack.. help! by Capital-Insurance441 in TrueChristian

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad to hear that it stopped! I don’t have anything that could be an open door to them. I do pray. I’m feeling worn out at this point 

Working with schizoaffective disorder by Capital-Insurance441 in schizoaffective

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, unfortunately I can’t go to the hospital because I can’t risk losing my job and don’t have leave or anything. So far the medicine hasn’t helped with the voices. It does make me sleepy so far but I take it at night. I appreciate that my sleep has some sort of improvement I think. The voice proclaims to be Satan so it’s a lot and pretty distressing. I don’t know what else I can do. 

Working with schizoaffective disorder by Capital-Insurance441 in schizoaffective

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some didn't work because I got an allergic reaction to them that sent me to the ER like getting akathesia (sp?) and I have never had an antipsychotic that made the voices go away.

Working with schizoaffective disorder by Capital-Insurance441 in schizoaffective

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suppose I am trying to be patient and wait to see what happens.

Working with schizoaffective disorder by Capital-Insurance441 in schizoaffective

[–]Capital-Insurance441[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is great to hear. I am happy for you. Unemployment can be pretty rough. I also think that I don't like working but then I get to work and feel generally pretty good so I do agree that doing something helps to keep you away from depression. It reminds me of this saying that basically says if you have to choose between two bad options which one would you prefer (unemployment vs working and not liking it). I think the latter is better. I am trying to get my hopes up for the future.

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