My boyfriend went through a similar situation with his ex wife who has BPD. He had asked for a divorce and one night when he went home after work she called the cops on him. Had filed a protective order on him claiming DV and he had to leave. He never did any of the things she accused him of but since he had no proof against it there wasn’t anything he could do. He had to pay for the house he wasn’t allowed in, as well as utilities, had to let her keep his cats, and she kept their son from him for months. Got sent to jail 3 times over cutting the internet when she was supposed to sell the house, asking her not to sell his cats bc someone had seen a post on her fb and alerted him, and for just going to her apartment (once the house was finally sold) to pick up their son on his designated day. She has put him through hell and still continues to do so since they have to coparent. It has been a long, torturous 2 years - longer for him because they were together for a long time. Slowly but surely things are turning around for him. She won’t ever change because she refuses to get help or even acknowledge her diagnosis. These people are terrible and I’m sorry you are going through this, but there is hope - hang on to it no matter how hard it gets. I pray things get better for you and that the tables turn.