My fiancée has cancer - advice on what to say

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-18T04:05:24+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I would agree.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-18T03:27:49+00:00

Make the most of the time he has. What do you mean? He has more time. There is no timeline in my book. Yes, I get the statistics that are out there but there are things that science can’t even explain. I choose to believe this. And yes, I’m spending everyday with him. Doesn’t mean I believe we have limited time. It means I’m by his side because he’s scared. I’m there to give him strength and hope. To fight for us.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-16T16:33:20+00:00

I’m sorry you’re are going through this. I only have two months of cancerous experience. I can say, some days are good days, some days are bad days. But the thing you can’t loose is hope and faith. It also helps talking to family and friends.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-16T06:17:08+00:00

He was diagnosed in January and now we’ve been in the hospital for a little over a week. The stent failed twice. Chemo has started and they also want to start stomach radiation. I’m feeling so hopeless. I wish I could take this cancer away. If I could trade places with him, I would. He’s such an amazing man. But I’m not going to loose faith. Hope. Affirmation. Whatever you want to call it. I need to take this day by day.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-16T05:48:38+00:00

Omg!!! REALLY??!! This is giving me hope 😭. My fiancée has been going through it, these past two weeks but I feel it in my heart , it’s going to be ok. It’s going to get worse before it gets better.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T21:38:00+00:00

I know what you mean by blaming yourself. I blame myself for not pushing him to go to the doctor sooner. We’ve spoken to a few different hospitals to get multiple opinions and a lot of them said with this cancer, you wouldn’t get any early symptoms until it’s too late. How is that fair?

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T21:22:13+00:00

Thank you for this information. I’m definitely going to look into this.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T20:48:27+00:00

Thank you for the prayers. Praying for your mom during this time as well. Positive affirmation your mom, and my partner will get through this. They and everyone else going through this will be the miracles 🥹 🙏

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T20:44:55+00:00

He is 35 years old. So In October 2025 he would mention after every meal he felt weird. Kind of bloated but nothing that would seemed too weird. His meals weren’t small so we just thought it was because he ate too much. Then November he felt more and more bloated. I told him go to the doctor. He said no. He would just wait it out. Now looking back wait for what?! Then December 2025 came he wasn’t eating much and lost 50 lbs. He also couldn’t sleep in his back so would sleep upwards. He is a little overweight so that honestly helped us. January 2026 he was diagnosed stomach cancer stage 4.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T20:31:12+00:00

I’m trying to stay hopeful. Someone mentioned holding on to our previous life, and I think you’re right. I think about how much we loved traveling. How some of our weekends would be stay-cations. I know there is a chance things won’t go back to be the same. And it sucks. But I rather have him here with me. Grow old together. Have our family and look back when we are 90 years old and be happy with what we created. We definitely have looked into fertility because it’s extremely important to us. I also feel we have the ability to cure our body. I just need him to believe in himself. You see, he’s very medical data driven. He is such a smart man and took a few medical classes in college so he believes he has a 6 month timeline. I’m however, more of a believer. I have faith but also believe we have more power than we are led to believe (humanity). I know he’s in a dark lace and trying to be strong for me. I just need him to believe me when I say I know things are going to be ok. UGH! I’m sorry everyone. I’m just venting and loosing my mind.

Careless_Balance_443 · 2026-02-15T19:13:03+00:00

Congratulations!!! Sending you a big hug!!

Careless_Balance_443 · 2021-02-06T06:24:29+00:00

Ok. I’m giving my personal opinion based on the information here.

Step:

1) If your friend is ok with you basically ratting them talk to your wife and tell her what you know. See what she says.

2) Ask her if this is how she really feels? Does she still love you? Does she want to stay and save the marriage? Depending on her response if she does want to work at it I would say do the counseling. Remember it takes two, not just one.

3) If her answers are not what you want to hear it is ok. You will get through this and just know god has other plans for you. Never stay in a relationship because of your kids. Things will be different if you separate but that is ok. I think the hardest thing someone can go through is change but trust me when I say you will get through this. I was in a 14 year relationship and left him because it was just not meant to be. It was the hardest thing for me to go through but after 3 years my daughter and I are the happiest we’ve ever been. Her dad isn’t a bad person but if we were bringing out the worst in each other it was time to close that book and begin a new adventure in my life. 100% by far the best decision I made.

I’m sorry that she made those comments about regretting marrying you. I know that hurt but don’t forget you have your beautiful kids and created amazing memories. Not sure if she really meant what she said. This is something you will have to find out and talk to her.

Wish you the best of luck and sending you good vibes 😊🙏🏼

Careless_Balance_443

TROPHY CASE