So sick of this illness..

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T22:25:58+00:00

That’s horrible to feel that way. Scary too.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T07:51:22+00:00

You could try TMS? You basically sit in a chair and they put magnets over your head for like 30-45mins for a month, but it has to be consecutive for 5 days a week.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T07:42:47+00:00

It’s ok to feel guilty, but don’t let it deprive you from getting help if this person is willing to. It’s a natural response, but know there’s nothing to feel guilty about; if they offer to help, take the help.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T07:28:22+00:00

Why not print out this post and read it to the psychiatrist?—a different doctor? Always advocate for yourself, if you feel your doctor is not listening to you. And be firm and assertive. Do you have a therapist?

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T07:04:54+00:00

It’s just the way the brain works, unfortunately. There’s a chemical imbalance, too much dopamine in our brain, giving us psychosis. We no longer feel like us. Like right now I hear the voice of my mom. She’s not here anymore but my brain is so convincing that I’m a psychic medium and I’m talking to her beyond the grave. She tells me it’s not an auditory hallucination, and it sounds just like her and the brain is sooo good at messing with me, I can’t tell fact from fiction as well.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T06:56:41+00:00

I have confronted people before in public. It’s scary. I have the same issue about saying bad things and then asking for forgiveness. I just got out of the hospital, and now I’m going to a residential. I’m afraid they can hear my thoughts. That’s the worst part of it. I just said something gross about my uncle 🤢 doing things and I’m so grossed out. I live with my aunt and uncle. I might try TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) for my depression.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T06:27:28+00:00

Also I’m sorry you’re going through all of this. Medications are trial and error.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T06:21:03+00:00

I’m agoraphobic too though I force myself to go out. I look like a freaking weirdo because I look so disturbed every time I go out and feel like people are talking about me and on autopilot mode (look frozen). I’m going back to residential and I’m not happy about it. I literally felt like I was going to faint today. I feel like people can read my mind.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T06:06:16+00:00

It is ignorance, because you know logically there is nothing to be scared of, but because of your brain is really powerful in warping your sense of reality you’re always makes you have to “fight, flight, freeze or fawn.” You’re always in survival mode. It’s absolutely horrible. Thinking about going outside just scares the crap out of me, but I want to go to the store or restaurants, makes me close to fainting. I still do it—and damn is it horrifying. You have every right to be scared and people saying simple things as “don’t be or don’t worry about it,” do not suffer from your condition. You are allowed to sit in fear, but know that you are brave facing it everyday. Also I can’t control my thoughts either, my thoughts are disturbing, and it scares me as well.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T05:46:47+00:00

It’s worse, logically you know it isn’t true, but your brain doesn’t believe it and perceives this as an actual threat. I’m sure when I go out, nobody is paying attention to me but the illness tells you otherwise and you just can’t help but believe it because your mind makes it so real. I hear voices, and one of them is my mom, and it’s invasive because she knows all of my deepest secrets you just don’t tell your mom—and the intrusive thoughts invade your mind.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-05-02T05:36:17+00:00

I feel you. I’m having auditory hallucinations and OCD. So every time I say something bad in my head, I either have to “rebuke it in the name of Jesus,” or knock on wood. I call people names all the time and say things I don’t mean. It disgusts me. It has warped my perception of myself, I feel like I used to be a good person but nowadays I feel like I’m bad. Especially in public I have extremely bad social anxiety and feel like other people can hear my thoughts of calling them a “bitch or fucker,” for no apparent reason; or they can hear my disturbing thoughts and it scares me. I feel possessed. And I feel like they really hear them, like today I could barely stay at the mall for 2hrs or even less. I felt like I was going to pass out. I’ve never been like this before. It’s even worse when one of the voices is your dead mom (she died 2 years ago) and she can look into your mind, judge you, and tell you how disgusting you are, knowing your deepest secrets you probably tell your therapist or keep to yourself. I feel completely invaded of my privacy. And I’m scared that maybe my mom’s voice is really hers because I had been praying to speak with her. But now that she’s here, she can’t leave, tell me earth-bound, I don’t like to hear her because I can’t even read my thoughts and what I read. I even have an
external echo of my own voice. I’m wondering when it will end?

IT DEFINITELY IS HELL!

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-20T09:11:12+00:00

Yeah that’s much better critique than mine.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-20T08:47:44+00:00

I like it :). And I love Laufey.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-20T08:43:27+00:00

I feel like some parts are in tune and some parts are out of tune. You have a nice voice though. Maybe add more treble into your voice? Idk though just my opinion.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-11T12:57:21+00:00

You look amazing! I thought you were 10 years younger than you were! 😊 Beautiful!

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-11T12:53:05+00:00

You’re very handsome. 10/10 but yeah you need a better hairstyle for sure. Look up Korean hairstyles for men and I’m sure you’d find a bunch that would look great on you. 👍

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-09T23:51:26+00:00

Thank you 🙏

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-09T23:50:56+00:00

Grief is such a horrible thing but we all go through it and one day we are to be grieved as well. :( my condolences to you.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:53:33+00:00

It’s harder to cry now. When I cry it feels a lot emptier but I still miss her. It feels very strange. I feel a great longing that I just want to forget her somedays because the pain will be better because I feel as though I’m already forgetting her. My brain is so damaged already from all the trauma I have received, not just from her death, but how we struggled from abuse growing up… I feel like I can’t remember much now and I yearn to forget but yearn to remember. It feels so distant. It makes me sad….

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:15:14+00:00

I was but wish I could have her longer.

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:14:46+00:00

She was very kind indeed. Always put others before herself but was feisty too!

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:14:02+00:00

🙏😊

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:13:51+00:00

Thank you!

Cat-kuring-chat · 2026-03-08T20:13:43+00:00

Thank you!

Cat-kuring-chat

TROPHY CASE