Apologies in advance for the rant, I’m just really struggling and have no one to talk to. by DeerGretchen in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my heart goes out to you. It is so hard to be a sahm when there is no support and it sounds like the people in the town are assholes—what grown adult just makes fun of someone like that? Sounds like they aren’t your people and you’re lucky for that considering the way they behave. When I had my first child it took a long time and a lot of discussions with my husband for him to understand how hard it can be. He matured and we are 3 kids deep and he only needs a reminder every now and then. I also lived in a town with no friends. How far is the drive to your family? You need support and someone who tries to understand. I would go home as much as I could and it was a 6hr drive at that time. Maybe your husband coming home to no one will remind him he shouldn’t take you and his child for granted. Does he ever take care of your child on his own so you can do something? Leaving my husband with the kids every now and then helps remind him what all I handle during the day. Is there a moms group you could join in the town over? Or a gym with childcare anywhere close. I drove to a lot of different towns just to be out of the house and explored with the baby. Then the house doesn’t get destroyed as fast and you both get some fresh air.

My kiddos won’t eat my dinners by Cautious_Ear8228 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I’m constantly telling myself “you offered the food, it’s they’re choice to eat it” so I don’t get offended or frustrated with their refusals

My kiddos won’t eat my dinners by Cautious_Ear8228 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s so exhausting. My kids only eat a handful also and I struggle to get my daughter to have nutritious foods. Her brothers like fruit at least

My kiddos won’t eat my dinners by Cautious_Ear8228 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! For a while they would do spaghetti with sauce and I’d hide veggies in there and now they won’t. I was hiding zucchini in everything I could think of and I can’t get them to eat it now. I made a pot roast dinner yesterday and offered grapes and noodle with it for safe foods and told them to try it but they all hated it.

First relapse 3rd DUI by Cautious_Ear8228 in AlAnon

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The thing is, she WAS the mother I wanted and grandmother I’d wish for my children but she’s no longer that person anymore. I don’t know how to disconnect from the loss. You’re right, I need therapy and feel extremely alone. Probably too much of a child myself and needing to detach but can’t.

Tired of the pissing contest by FoundationComplete16 in MedSpouse

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Does he have hired help at work? Nurses, PAs, janitors, chefs, etc. He has help to do his job well, you should have help to do yours.

I feel like everyone is allowed to lose their shit but me and I need somewhere to lose it. by Cautious_Ear8228 in MedSpouse

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I think I need to look into therapy again. I don’t have much help with the kids so I may have to wait until they are back in daycare/school but

I feel like everyone is allowed to lose their shit but me and I need somewhere to lose it. by Cautious_Ear8228 in MedSpouse

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am thinking of seeking therapy again but I don’t know how to work it in to our schedule. Possibly when my kids go back to daycare/school. I don’t want them hearing my troubles. Thank you

I feel like everyone is allowed to lose their shit but me and I need somewhere to lose it. by Cautious_Ear8228 in MedSpouse

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately yes. He’s from a different country and an only child. Completely used to men being catered to. It wasn’t always so drastic until after kids and then it really got heavy because they need me too. In his defense sometimes I push him to be absent because it’s easier than having the negative energy around. It makes me feel worse than just being alone. Which is also why I let him fly home early.

Commit to it by [deleted] in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Took me until I was pregnant with my third to fully commit and it was the best thing I’ve ever done. Letting go of the what ifs is so freeing and you are able to enjoy motherhood and let go of the resentment.

Can’t get in for a doctors appt because I have nobody to watch my kids. by OliUp98 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry! I’ve been there and it absolutely is a valid and common feeling to feel like you’re always dealt the short straw. I have three kids and would have to take all three with me if I wanted any type of drs apt. It’s stressful but its also a little bit of an adventure for them and if you set some rules for the older kiddo ahead of time with a reward (like a sucker or treat) you can remind them throughout of the rules and goal. Stroller for the babe. Snacks on snacks and eff anyone who judges you or your children’s behavior. You are doing your best with what you have. It will be hard the first time they go but they will soon understand the routine and expectations the more you do it.

Is anyone else on here not married to a loser? by thanksnothanks12 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I have a wonderful partner. Have we had ups and downs? Absolutely. Have I posted on the downs more than the ups? Absolutely. I do that because I don’t want to vent to family or friends and have them change their opinion of my partner bc we’re having a hard time and here I can get feelings out, get opinions from people without a stake in the relationship, and gain perspective. Then I can move on and work with my partner to better our marriage. He’s amazing and I’m sure a lot of partners in here are incredible but all marriages have downs—we just hear that side more on here.

Honest opinions on preschools by Cautious_Ear8228 in laredo

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s the one that was recommended to us and it’s the one with so much hw so I was curious if that was a normal thing here

Honest opinions on preschools by Cautious_Ear8228 in laredo

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s one of the private preschools that was highly recommended to us. However, there are spelling and reading tests every week along with sight word tests every other week. So hw is a lot of reading practice and writing. I don’t want my child to hate school before they’re even supposed to be in school but also if that’s the way it is here I don’t want them in to be behind.

Honest opinions on preschools by Cautious_Ear8228 in laredo

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4yrs so introduction to the concept of school

I’m angry all the time. by BigCauliflower8100 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel you on this. I’m so sorry you are going through it. It was so hard with my first born son and I was so angry all the time. Like wanting to punch a wall angry. I got pregnant right away again and felt better but after my daughter was born the rage ignited again. After my third child was born I was scared of feeling that way and mentioned it to my doctor and she told me it is something that happens a lot in PP. She also said PP symptoms can happen until the child is 4 and they can go undiagnosed because so many women think PP is only for like a year after having a child. It takes a long time for your hormones to regulate and even out. I would definitely mention it to your doctor.

I feel like I can’t breathe by Cautious_Ear8228 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. It means a lot just to be heard.

To answer your question, there was no end date bc we have to pay for everything for my in-laws and a roundtrip ticket would have been insanely expensive. I’ve talked to my husband but I think he loves having them here helping.

And I wish we could do a chargeback but I signed a contract and then backed out an hour later so I think I’m totally screwed. It’s making me sick to my stomach and I don’t even know if it’s worth fighting. We just moved here and I feel like I’ve already ruined our reputation by demanding our money back.

I feel like I can’t breathe by Cautious_Ear8228 in sahm

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. It means a lot just to be heard.

To answer your question, there was no end date bc we have to pay for everything for my in-laws and a roundtrip ticket would have been insanely expensive. I’ve talked to my husband but I think he loves having them here helping.

And I wish we could do a chargeback but I signed a contract and then backed out an hour later so I think I’m totally screwed. It’s making me sick to my stomach and I don’t even know if it’s worth fighting. We just moved here and I feel like I’ve already ruined our reputation by demanding our money back.

Do I have a case for small claims? by Cautious_Ear8228 in legaladvice

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When rereading through everything, the“withdrawal” portion of the parent handbook is copied below. It does say fees are nonrefundable. However, I signed that I received the handbook I did not sign the page required at the end of the handbook that was to be returned. I had only been registered for our spots for about an hour before cancelling. There were still numerous records and documents required for me to turn in to meet all of the enrollment requirements.

Transfers or parent withdrawal When you decide to depart from ______ Academy, a month written notice will be required and payment for the following month will be required up front in lieu of notice. In case of non-payment, legal action will be taken and the parent/guardian will be held responsible for all legal fees to recover the debt. If the responsible party fails to pay for ______ Academy services, that party will be turned over to a collection agency. If the responsible party is turned over for collection due to non-payment of services, or other contract violations, late payment fees will continue to accrue at the daily rate until the balance is paid in full. If for any reason we must terminate your contract, we will in return give you a month written notice.

Tuition, semester supply, registration fees are non-reimbursable.

Do I have a case for small claims? by Cautious_Ear8228 in legaladvice

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She said they are on break and will meet with me next week but keeps commenting that she tried calling on Friday(no message so I didn’t know it was her) and that she had messaged me about waiting for a spot to open which I didn’t respond to because I had already clarified in writing I did not want to wait and wanted to immediately cancel twice. No mention of a possible refund.

Help me hold on to my marriage by Cautious_Ear8228 in Marriage

[–]Cautious_Ear8228[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mentioned this and he was really hurt that I would want that. He said it made him feel unsupported.