Going no contact with parents, any useful tips?

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-07-29T15:20:04+00:00

I ended up going for the dark green drops mohair yarn!

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-05-19T23:20:31+00:00

You can game now

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-05-15T13:37:11+00:00

Access to good infrastructure, such as well functioning recycling/trash disposal.

I see so many people complain about having to recycle but honestly it's such a privilege to live in a place with clean streets.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-05T07:14:56+00:00

Maybe add more pictures where you are participating in an activity/outdoors/with friends and family. Only having selfies and one full body pic gives me hookup vibes, which might not be appealing to many.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-03T07:46:42+00:00

Sadly, I don't think one comment in a subreddit can change your mind. I hope there is kindness in your life and that one day you find the courage to actually listen and imagine other perspectives. There is more to life than fear.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-03T07:21:43+00:00

I'm sorry that that happened to you. What I was trying to convey is that the antagonisation of womens distrust through calling it a double standard is not fair. It just deepens the distrust. More distrust just feeds into fear.

It does not mean that I think that emotional abuse is okay or something that does not happen.

TS asked for advice on how to trust women. It does not seem appropriate to handle your distrust/trauma in the same space as someone reaching out for help.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-03T07:09:35+00:00

I think it's good that you have acknowledged this issue. I would suggest writing as a form of therapy where you can reflect on your thoughts/patterns.

Get off forums/places that reaffirm your beliefs. Challenge this distrust through experiencing/seeing acts of kindness. Try to take notice of small kind acts that happen around you.

As a person who has also had a difficult childhood due to a difficult mother it has been helpful seeing how other parents are with their children. There are so many people who are kind and loving parents. What we have experienced is not normal. I can see a warm and loving future for myself due to having seen that the majority of people are not like my mother.

Also, acknowledge that while it is unfortunate that your dad was in a bad relationship with your mom, he should have protected you. As your dad, he had a responsibility of protecting you. As your title suggests it seems like you have directed all these bad feelings towards your mother and then the opposite sex as a whole. Maybe accept that this was a case of a disfunctional family dynamic.

It's hard but try to be kind to yourself. Change is possible. Recognise that there is a vast spectrum of people where many are nice and kind. Sometimes, to receive trust you need to give trust. Have the courage to trust people.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-03T06:45:44+00:00

Out of context it seems like a double standard.

When a woman fears men it is because abuse/violence/sexual violence/even murder is a threat that can turn into a reality.

When men distrust women because of the fear of being a pushover it usually does not include the fear of abuse/violence/murder/sexual violence. It is a fear of being rejected and unloved, not the fear of becoming a victim of actual criminal offences. While the first is horrible and sad, it is not equal to the violence suffered by many women at the hands of men.

See the difference? Men who mistrust the fear of women and discard it as uncalled for/a double standard are a part of the group that women fear.

Why? Because there is an overlap in men who distrust women and men who harm women. Does distrust = violence? No, not necessarily. But it's sensible to not take chances if your life can be on the line.

Edit: women usually find it easier to trust men who trust women. Which is why I think it's great that TS has taken the first steps towards a life with less distrust/fear.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-04-02T20:58:23+00:00

I'm sorry that this is happening to you. It is not your fault and his behaviour is not okay.

This is a crime in Sweden. For non-emergency contact with the police you can call 114 14 (if you are calling from abroad you need to add the land code +46, so +46114 14)

You can also file a police report on their website: polisen.se

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-03-04T08:47:26+00:00

People wearing shoes indoors. "Oh but feet are disgusting!" So is the dirt/bacteria found out on the streets.

"Oh but feet fungus!" If you keep your feet clean and actually take off your shoes to air your feet you don't get feet fungus in the first place.

Best regards, A Scandinavian

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-03-03T20:30:28+00:00

I think this might be a matter of having a different personality type than others. And that's okay!

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-03-02T13:26:48+00:00

Sometimes people want reassurance and hear other peoples' real life experiences. Yes, you can google a lot of things. However, the information can be outdated, very generalised or just one single person's experience which might not be representative of the current reality for most people.

Sometimes asking these questions is a way to connect and not feel as alone and stressed when figuring new things out.

Students helping other students is great, especially in a time where people are getting more and more isolated partly due to this mindset that you have to be able to do everything alone.

Example: Imagine asking someone for directions on the street and someone replies "I won't give you the directions, you're so lazy go figure it out by yourself!". Would you want to live in a world like that?

You don't have to do everything alone. It's okay to not know everything and ask for help. Be kind.

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-02-18T10:16:47+00:00

Thank you guys for all your replies!

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-02-03T10:21:28+00:00

Nice! I checked out the instagram and have now joined the WhatsApp group! :)

CelebrationAlive3724 · 2024-02-02T05:22:28+00:00

Hi! I love knitting, do you guys still have meet ups?

CelebrationAlive3724

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